So I got fired, and thus evicted. My boss...let's just say karma will take care of him. What he did to me, how he did it, how he spoke to me and how he set things up so that I had no warning (I had a feeling, but a boss should give you actual warning, dont you think?) that this would happen so suddenly. What he did to me, he has done to several others who came before me.

But I am happier now and want to live life much more than I ever did when I was at that house doing that job. In fact I got a practice week, if you will. Whenever I had days off, I was expected to leave the house and find somewhere to go, usually I just slept in my car. Last week I showed myself how self sufficient I can be, and still draw and get online without spending much money. So...now I get to use what I've learned, and learn much more, to live out of my car for an indefinite period of time.

I have put up ads on craigslist and such for housing in exchange for work, but I'm not going to rush into a godamn thing. I don't ever, ever want to give another person power over me like that. I will never be someone's victim or servant or bitch again (unless it's part of a kinky scene xP) and I know now I DON'T have to work a piece of shit job like fast food just to pay rent at a place I hate, living with people I hate. That is not the only way to live! Society likes to put rules on shit, like you can't get an apartment unless you show this this and this....well...fuck you and your apartment then.

I am homeless...though honestly as long as I have my car and it runs (which it does) I do have a home. It's rough, I have to constantly drive to find places to park/hide, but it's totally ok. I don't want to stay homeless. I want my own place...mostly so that I can rp and play video games and watch Star Trek in some privacy and comfort. I don't know how long I will be living in my car, but I can tell you I'm not rushing to move in with someone who is going to want to take up my time/energy.

I am entitled to financial aid money, so I will be going after that. I will even go and ask for things that I previously felt I didnt "deserve" or that I felt shame for asking. I still feel it...but it's surprisingly easy now to not swallow my pride, but ignore it just long enough to do what I need to do for basic shit. I will be haunting my VA office, the welfare office, everything.

I dont want a shitty job. I know that I can make money from my art. I've done it before. There are murals up in my town, put up because of ME. Designed, painted by me! Even if all I can raise in the beginning is a bit of gas money so I can rest stop hop for a while, that's enough. Because more always comes from that little bit...I just need a start.

so I will be creating ads and stuff for my commissions. I sure as hell have the time now lol. and the motivation is coming in strong, too. Eventually, I want to go to LA. Last week I drove down to 6 Flags and it was just amazing how it feels down south...there is an energy there that I just want to be a part of. I don't hate my current city nearly as much anymore, after I drove through Sacramento and saw the utter bleakness of life there. I was so affected by the terrible, grim vibes of that place I cried for an hour as I drove away...I felt like an external force was pushing those strong, horrible feelings into my head. If nothing else, that place would just waste my time.