Sadness and Frustration
9 years ago
Ugghhh.... Every few weeks just when everything starts to look brighter. Why do you have to punch me in the heart all over again. I'm not asking for you to go out with me again or move in. I just want to talk. Talk to the person I was closer to than anyone else, even if we aren't a couple anymore. I miss our conversations so much. I have so many ideas, and things I want to share and you won't give me a chance, I just want an opportunity to reconnect. These last few months have changed me so much. I've put so much effort into being a better person than I was. though it feels it matters less and less. I keep at it, but this loneliness, it eats away at me. It's so crushing, and I have no one now... No one to listen, to help when things are tough. To show how much I care every day, and how much more I care now.
Every day it feels like I'm losing a little more of you. Every balked message, and sharp turn down. I wrack myself every day and every night wondering what horrible thing I did to make things awful between us when it ended so amicably. Is there still something there your afraid of. Or was just everything so bad that now your soured to my existence. I just don't know and it's poisoning my mind. So many things I loved and enjoyed now just leave me depressed or crying.
I just want the pain to stop... this hole in my heart. And every time you talk to me it feels a little better. Like a broken part of me was repaired. And then you rip it away. tear out the stitches and leave me broken again. Broken, crying and still missing you so much.
I lost the person who made me feel whole
the one who made all the missteps and hard times better.
the best friend I've ever had, and I miss your friendship and company more than anything in the world.
Every day it feels like I'm losing a little more of you. Every balked message, and sharp turn down. I wrack myself every day and every night wondering what horrible thing I did to make things awful between us when it ended so amicably. Is there still something there your afraid of. Or was just everything so bad that now your soured to my existence. I just don't know and it's poisoning my mind. So many things I loved and enjoyed now just leave me depressed or crying.
I just want the pain to stop... this hole in my heart. And every time you talk to me it feels a little better. Like a broken part of me was repaired. And then you rip it away. tear out the stitches and leave me broken again. Broken, crying and still missing you so much.
I lost the person who made me feel whole
the one who made all the missteps and hard times better.
the best friend I've ever had, and I miss your friendship and company more than anything in the world.
Here is some advice I gave another friend not too long ago.
When things get bad enough they come to an end, it's time to just step back and reflect on the situation.
It's obvious the breakup wasn't something you asked for, but it's still something that in time you will need to accept. Relationships need to work for both of the individuals involved.
Take some time for yourself, try not to think about it. and make some space. If things have soured to the point that there is resentment, just give her some space. Give her a chance to let go of that anger. Asking for something she is unwilling to give at the moment, is just pushing her further into resentment, I would guess. Having some time and space, will also give you a chance to calm as well. Just cut off all communication for a while, find some ways to vent, and some friends to cheer you up.
Come onto tapestries sometime. I've hardly seen you around in years. :)