I guess I'm just back to square one on everything. The usual helping out and being unappreciated for it here. The arguments on things needed to be done, the whole lack of many things. It's hard to be alone here and really only to talk to is online from how far apart everyone is.

The one thing I tried not to be is a burden to anyone, but usually that's how I brush off on people. If that wasn't the case, maybe someone dear to me wouldn't be more in tune to say they hate me. Anyone I do chat with and someone in particular now, I just don't want to go that route with them either.

My dad got hurt earlier and might go to the er, if he does that might affect plenty more here on this end on really doing anything. I hate relying on people too much when I shouldn't or come off annoying when I am trying to impress them otherwise because of how much they mean to me. Hard to just communicate when someone you can only see them by text when they are so far away. With everything being done here, you just don't want to be in this place and would rather be there, and you miss that and them a lot.

Just another night to think until I can do more later.