Am I Trying Too Hard?
9 years ago
Okay, so a lot of things have been going on this month.
Work has been great but very time consuming and draining, the main reason I haven't been submitting drawings sooner than usual.
I really miss not having a job actually and just spending time drawing away whatever came to mind.
But I NEED the money, and I NEED to do SOMETHING with my life.
It's just, so many things have been changing for me left and right and I just can't slow down for a moment and think anymore.
Things use to be so easy, but now it's such a struggle anymore. I really don't know how other people do it. And I don't have a car or a house I need to manage.
I guess I AM stupid because I truly do not know what to do in my life.
Main thing I wanted to talk about...or ask actually, was if I am trying to hard to make my art "perfect".
Let's face it, perfect art is a fool's dream, it's something no one, not even the greats could create. Yet, my mind thinks it sees perfect art when it sees drawings done by such wonderful artists, DA, FA, anywhere really. And then I get envious and want to do everything in my power to make my art look just as good.
I'm slow because I want things to be "perfect" to be precise. I'm like that meme "When the drawing is JUST RIGHT..."
I spend hours trying to make the lineart just right, or the eyes this or that way. I spend hours coloring, making sure I get EVERY pixel and then I spend even more hours shading. And then I spend hours redoing certain parts if I accidentally goofed up somewhere in the drawing. It's happened more than I'd like to admit...
I try to be "perfect" and it feels like a curse. It feels like I'm trying too hard. Part of me doesn't mind while the other part thinks I am taking too much time than needed for one simple drawing.
What do you guys think? Can anyone give me some peace on the subject?
And last thing I want to address before bringing this to a close, YES I heard about that horrible shooting at the Orlando nightclub and YES I felt awful about it.
Not so much because they were gay and were killed...okay this is sounding bad, please let me explain.
I am the kind of person who does not separate the gays from the regular people. People are all the same in my eyes. I hate that people refer to them as an individual race. Just call them...human beings. Like we all are.
In God's eyes we are all the same, so it doesn't matter.
And so what I meant before was, I was upset because I hate seeing death, anywhere to ANYONE.
Life is a precious thing and I fear for mine sometimes because once it's gone, it's gone.
They're lives were stolen. I bet a few of them had great things planned for themselves, but in an instant their lives were stolen. Why? because they were different?
C'mon people, is it really too hard to love someone? Let alone love them for who they are?
I'm sorry if this got deep and again, please read it ALL before getting mad at me. I don't hate ANYONE nor do I want to offend anyone.
I just get really worried when saying things like this because internet is viral and I don't want to set a bad name for myself.
I'm just trying to share my feelings.
Please stay safe everyone, especially during these times.
Work has been great but very time consuming and draining, the main reason I haven't been submitting drawings sooner than usual.
I really miss not having a job actually and just spending time drawing away whatever came to mind.
But I NEED the money, and I NEED to do SOMETHING with my life.
It's just, so many things have been changing for me left and right and I just can't slow down for a moment and think anymore.
Things use to be so easy, but now it's such a struggle anymore. I really don't know how other people do it. And I don't have a car or a house I need to manage.
I guess I AM stupid because I truly do not know what to do in my life.
Main thing I wanted to talk about...or ask actually, was if I am trying to hard to make my art "perfect".
Let's face it, perfect art is a fool's dream, it's something no one, not even the greats could create. Yet, my mind thinks it sees perfect art when it sees drawings done by such wonderful artists, DA, FA, anywhere really. And then I get envious and want to do everything in my power to make my art look just as good.
I'm slow because I want things to be "perfect" to be precise. I'm like that meme "When the drawing is JUST RIGHT..."
I spend hours trying to make the lineart just right, or the eyes this or that way. I spend hours coloring, making sure I get EVERY pixel and then I spend even more hours shading. And then I spend hours redoing certain parts if I accidentally goofed up somewhere in the drawing. It's happened more than I'd like to admit...
I try to be "perfect" and it feels like a curse. It feels like I'm trying too hard. Part of me doesn't mind while the other part thinks I am taking too much time than needed for one simple drawing.
What do you guys think? Can anyone give me some peace on the subject?
And last thing I want to address before bringing this to a close, YES I heard about that horrible shooting at the Orlando nightclub and YES I felt awful about it.
Not so much because they were gay and were killed...okay this is sounding bad, please let me explain.
I am the kind of person who does not separate the gays from the regular people. People are all the same in my eyes. I hate that people refer to them as an individual race. Just call them...human beings. Like we all are.
In God's eyes we are all the same, so it doesn't matter.
And so what I meant before was, I was upset because I hate seeing death, anywhere to ANYONE.
Life is a precious thing and I fear for mine sometimes because once it's gone, it's gone.
They're lives were stolen. I bet a few of them had great things planned for themselves, but in an instant their lives were stolen. Why? because they were different?
C'mon people, is it really too hard to love someone? Let alone love them for who they are?
I'm sorry if this got deep and again, please read it ALL before getting mad at me. I don't hate ANYONE nor do I want to offend anyone.
I just get really worried when saying things like this because internet is viral and I don't want to set a bad name for myself.
I'm just trying to share my feelings.
Please stay safe everyone, especially during these times.
FA+

like you I trust you all the time
I hate feeling locked up all the time.
Being bottled up is not a fun thing.
I try to be detailed and it gets worse when I need things symmetrical. Oi...Doing the last ref was a bit of a pain because of that...
I love drawing. I really do. But I feel like it's such a challenge and I get pissed when I see videos or streams and those artists are just zipping through drawings like nothing. That's why I hardly stream myself.
I just can't figure out whats wrong with me.