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I Am Still Here!
8 years ago
I have sometimes terrifying nightmares, a side effect of my creative drive and schizophrenia I suppose.
The fox never has a chance to rest peacefully, even in my sleep I am tormented by these hyper-realistic dream worlds. So someone prodded me to write my dreams down, and... and here it goes.
It all started at 9'o'clock in the morning today.
The first reality dream, there was a gas main break in the street, the line runs in front of our house, and it was so dangerous and there was a guy hacking at the pavement with a pick-axe and hoping we don't explode, me and my dad, my dad was insistent on getting out of the house. But when we got out of the house, it was invisible. Like it disappeared, and I couldn't touch anything and I felt a real sense of loss...
The second was also a gas leak guy, but more realistic, we have to evacuate just in case, standing around watching the guy with the gas line not exploding yet.
The third, now, we (there are other NPCs and such) were all in a classroom, teaching about something, and then a tornado occurred and I held my head down like I was supposed to, to shield myself from flying debris. The roof was ripped away, and then the tornado destroyed the buildings next to ours and I thought 'oh I hope they are in the right position.' And then someone said, I think a girl because her voice sounded female, 'that's not how you treat a tornado', and then she went up and hugged it, the tornado was now person sized and friendly more or less. And then I had trading cards for all the people that were in the tornado like hockey cards. They had red edging, like Donruss used to do.
Next, I woke up to the house in order and everything. Everything seems normal. Now I am in reality, I think. I look at the clock and, and, oh gosh hurry up Rich's dad says, you have to go nownow! Maybe it will be okay still be okay if you show up anyway.
The fifth started with me looking at the clock and panicking because I would be late, can't be late oh no! The rest of the fifth dream is fuzzy, though, but I remember being terrified that I was dead because I couldn't move my arms or legs. I was also asking my dad to punch me so it would feel real, but he never did...
The Sixth dream involved some friendly guys working on my house for some reason, I think they were redoing the bathroom and such, I was told not to interfere with them and go to your room, Rich, and I did.
And I listened to music for a bit (BILLY SQUIER THE STROKE) and then felt the ground rumbling and oh no it's an earthquake! This shouldn't happen in Michigan. I don't remember much of this one.
The final dream felt so much like reality, that I was terrified that it had happened and I'd missed my appointment. Everything looks normal, I feel all the realism, I'm sure I'm awake aren't I? Oh gods I've slept too long and missed my appointment and now everyone will know I'm such a loser because I can't even sleep right.
Then I was awake without being able to move, like I am a human vegetable. I can't move. I can't reach for anything. Oh god am I dying? The blankets are smothering me... I'm going to die somebody help please lift this weight off me!
It was so terrifyingly realistic in my mind. When I awoke for real, in reality, I felt along the sheets and mattress to make sure it was real this time. I almost asked my dad if the gas line is okay.
Then I felt the burning panic panic PANIC to must immediately confirm I am in reality (sometimes, I generate whole instant messenger conversations with people, this is obviously not a good thing when I ask about something that didn't happen yet. I immediately IM'd someone who is a very dear friend of mine, and asked them to tell me about what happened in their last thirty minutes. To make it seem real, you see. Not a generated illusion disguise...
And now I am awake. I think. Right?
So this is what it's like for me pretty much every day. But don't worry! I'm an engineer, you know, I will keep this course as steady as I can. I solve problems. Practical problems. And I hate unutilized resources...
also sorry for terrible formatting, the FA is not nice to me wordtexts...
Oh, also, I did make my appointment. I woke up with thirty minutes to spare. So this all transpires in compressed elongated time for me... anyway,
Love and foxie hugs~
Trick The Fox
The fox never has a chance to rest peacefully, even in my sleep I am tormented by these hyper-realistic dream worlds. So someone prodded me to write my dreams down, and... and here it goes.
It all started at 9'o'clock in the morning today.
The first reality dream, there was a gas main break in the street, the line runs in front of our house, and it was so dangerous and there was a guy hacking at the pavement with a pick-axe and hoping we don't explode, me and my dad, my dad was insistent on getting out of the house. But when we got out of the house, it was invisible. Like it disappeared, and I couldn't touch anything and I felt a real sense of loss...
The second was also a gas leak guy, but more realistic, we have to evacuate just in case, standing around watching the guy with the gas line not exploding yet.
The third, now, we (there are other NPCs and such) were all in a classroom, teaching about something, and then a tornado occurred and I held my head down like I was supposed to, to shield myself from flying debris. The roof was ripped away, and then the tornado destroyed the buildings next to ours and I thought 'oh I hope they are in the right position.' And then someone said, I think a girl because her voice sounded female, 'that's not how you treat a tornado', and then she went up and hugged it, the tornado was now person sized and friendly more or less. And then I had trading cards for all the people that were in the tornado like hockey cards. They had red edging, like Donruss used to do.
Next, I woke up to the house in order and everything. Everything seems normal. Now I am in reality, I think. I look at the clock and, and, oh gosh hurry up Rich's dad says, you have to go nownow! Maybe it will be okay still be okay if you show up anyway.
The fifth started with me looking at the clock and panicking because I would be late, can't be late oh no! The rest of the fifth dream is fuzzy, though, but I remember being terrified that I was dead because I couldn't move my arms or legs. I was also asking my dad to punch me so it would feel real, but he never did...
The Sixth dream involved some friendly guys working on my house for some reason, I think they were redoing the bathroom and such, I was told not to interfere with them and go to your room, Rich, and I did.
And I listened to music for a bit (BILLY SQUIER THE STROKE) and then felt the ground rumbling and oh no it's an earthquake! This shouldn't happen in Michigan. I don't remember much of this one.
The final dream felt so much like reality, that I was terrified that it had happened and I'd missed my appointment. Everything looks normal, I feel all the realism, I'm sure I'm awake aren't I? Oh gods I've slept too long and missed my appointment and now everyone will know I'm such a loser because I can't even sleep right.
Then I was awake without being able to move, like I am a human vegetable. I can't move. I can't reach for anything. Oh god am I dying? The blankets are smothering me... I'm going to die somebody help please lift this weight off me!
It was so terrifyingly realistic in my mind. When I awoke for real, in reality, I felt along the sheets and mattress to make sure it was real this time. I almost asked my dad if the gas line is okay.
Then I felt the burning panic panic PANIC to must immediately confirm I am in reality (sometimes, I generate whole instant messenger conversations with people, this is obviously not a good thing when I ask about something that didn't happen yet. I immediately IM'd someone who is a very dear friend of mine, and asked them to tell me about what happened in their last thirty minutes. To make it seem real, you see. Not a generated illusion disguise...
And now I am awake. I think. Right?
So this is what it's like for me pretty much every day. But don't worry! I'm an engineer, you know, I will keep this course as steady as I can. I solve problems. Practical problems. And I hate unutilized resources...
also sorry for terrible formatting, the FA is not nice to me wordtexts...
Oh, also, I did make my appointment. I woke up with thirty minutes to spare. So this all transpires in compressed elongated time for me... anyway,
Love and foxie hugs~
Trick The Fox
