FA+
Shop
The Trick Manifesto
8 years ago
I should probably post this here as well, but the link is http://www.furaffinity.net/view/23294540/ and it really is an important writing. EDIT APRIL 24TH 2017 to make more better again?
So here it goes. And while these interactions are exaggerated to better show the details and effects, this is really not too far from what people are like with my interactions.
The Trick Manifesto
I am here to write sexy things for people to make them happy and/or masturbate. I ask for little in return because I gain more personal satisfaction at seeing them enjoy my gifts to them without charge.
I do not come here to talk about my real life problems, I want to get away from them, yet people keep asking me how I feel and when I respond they are like 'why is it always about you'.
I do not want to talk about my feelings, but people ask how I am. Even in the literal sense, not the proverbial 'hey what's up' kind of why. They continue and repeatedly try to ask about my feelings. I don't understand why people are angered when I give them what they asked so many times for.
They accuse me of being selfish when I tell them my honest feelings, that it is all about you Trick, that you want to have this pity party all for yourself when I asked 38 times how are you feeling, gah Trick why is it whenever we talk it's about you?
And I further confused because I did not volunteer or offer such emotions in the first place, now I am labelled selfish when I tell people my emotions after they ask so many times?
Then they accuse me of wanting to play the victim. How could you be so callous and self-centered, Trick, why is everything always about you? People think that they are so valuable and that denying me interaction is the ultimate insult YAY I WIN FOREVER TRICK THE FOX WHO DIDN'T EVEN SHOW UP IS THE LOSEREST LOSER EVER. That'll show Trick! I will go to extensive lengths of effort in order to make sure I do not receive contact from them again HA HA I WIN FOREVER YOU LOSE TRICK
And meanwhile I'm just sitting on the park bench outside the stadium being all... 'Eh maybe I won't go the football game today, there'll be another soon' and shrug my shoulders and just wander off. It's not like there won't be more football games, why is this one so special? SPOILER ALERT: It's not.
MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE BAT CAVE I MEAN THIS GUY'S BASEMENT
The other person is giddily gleefully taking like, all the time in the world going on about how he has blocked me and isn't that the greatest? I am sol great and important, look at me now. Damnit, Trick, why don't you appreciate the effort I took to remove you from my life?
It is like they want to imagine 'I am the center of their universe' and when I do not act such way, well, we'll just call you that anyway. Gosh, Trick why are you so selfish, caring about other's feelings and not your own?
Like they want to let me know how important I am to their very existence, that I should be grovelling and begging just to spend time with them. Don't you realize, Trick, what a great dishonour and lost opportunity it is for you, me denying you the chance to roleplay with me? Don't you see that?
Meanwhile, I'm sipping some Diet Pepsi (Coke Sucks There I Said It) and am working on writing, or videoing, or whatever the Fox does best.
They act as if this is the ULTIMATE INSULT FOREVER and look at me Trick, look at what great lengths I have gone to remove you.
And I am like, "Huh? Whatever, sure, you really aren't that special to me. I mean I respect your needs and wants and desires, I am patient with you when you disappear or such, I don't let it bother me because those things are in the past, and I would like to look forward to a fun and exciting future with you."
These people really think that I am so obsessed with them that I would die or kill myself if they were not around, YEAH TAKE THAT TRICK. When it is like... these people are of such little importance, sometimes I even forget their names and sometimes forget why they are mad at me.
That's a fun one. 'Hello character I have not approached before, you look sexy and interesting, would you like to roleplay?' "DAMNIT TRICK HOW CAN YOU BE SO CALLOUS AND UNCARING JUST RUDE AND INSULTING TO APPROACH ME AGAIN FOR RP CLEARLY YOU SHOULD KNOW WHO I AM BECAUSE I HAVE AN ALTAR IN MY COMPUTER ROOM DEDICATED TO YOU."
I am like 'huh? Do I know you?" And they are like "Isn't it obvious who this is why do you not have a ginormous rolodex with all my alts so that you should know how much I hate you for some reason across all the universe because I am that important.
So I ask 'okay, sure, if you hate me that much, just tell me who you are and I shall endeavour to avoid you in the future. It is just polite after all, I do not want to bring up old feelings.'
"GOD DAMNIT TRICK YOU SHOULD KNOW WHO I AM AND YOU SHOULD KNOW ALL 37,000 OF MY ALTS WHAT THE FOX TRICK WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID AND dumb, how selfish can you be to not know intrinsically all my alternate characters already? Why are you so self-centered?"
"Damnit, Trick, how can you be so arrogant as to not pay attention to me and the great lengths and efforts I have gone through to remove you from my life, how can you be so selfish!"
"Trick, you asshole, how have you not picked up on the tiny little clues and hints over this time that I do not really like this roleplay and I am only doing it to make you happy. Why are you so demanding in that you should ask me for what I would really like to do? How can you be so selfish, always asking others what they would like and what pleases them. You are a terrible person, Trick. Your emotions are invalid and meaningless so I will stamp all over them in front of you, how does that feel?"
"I just want to make you happy."
"UGH TRICK WHY ARE YOU STILL BEING SO ARROGANT AND SELFISH! WHY ARE YOU NOT LETTING ME HELP YOU WITH YOUR OWN EMOTIONS I AM SO UTTERLY INVESTED IN THEM FOR SOME REASON."
Especially when I do not volunteer such information myself. I do not want to talk about my feelings or emotions, I don't consider them important.
I just want to write the sexy talk. Being a friend is not my primary goal. The interests we share should be in liking me writing big damn prose about sexy foxes and shit, I really do not care about your personal life because I am here to interact with your character, but I respect and appreciate your desires and needs and whatever happens in real life is more important.
And then I am told 'why do you not respect other people's feelings Trick' and it confuses the fox.
Confuse, not anger.
The fox is never angry. No matter how many times people tell him to be, there is really very little that angers or upsets the Trick Fox. And I don't understand why people want to see me as angry and bitter and frustrated and a jerk to other people, when that is the antithesis of my existence when I am all those things to myself because I don't believe my emotions are worth anything compared to others.
That I want to please you and make you happy and smile and that's all, and then people get angry at me, telling me I am selfish for wanting to do what they want, and arrogant and such, and that I am not thinking about other people's feelings when I am only thinking about other people's feelings and not my own, and they get further enraged at me when they try to help me and I say 'no thanks' why is that?
Why are other people allowed to offer support and suggestions for improvement to me, and when I kindly ask them to not worry about my feelings, it is such a grievous insult to their very core?
How is caring about other people's feelings selfish? There is literally no one else that treats me as badly as myself. I don't need anyone else's help to make me feel miserable, I am fine on my own.
I think and feel I deserve this, that this is what I should get for being a terrible person. But it is like when people go 'let me cheer you up Trick how can I help' and I say 'Thanks for the offer but I do not wish to be helped', they react as if I had just raped and killed their mother?
That it is such a personal affront to politely not accept others' help? It is like 'Hey Trick here's $20 you should go buy a nice meal' 'Naw I can afford it myself.' 'FINE THEN NOBODY SHOULD EVER USE THIS MONEY EVER' and they burn it right in front of me and tell me I'm selfish and biased and self-centered for not accepting their offer.
It just doesn't make sense to me.
People get outrageously offended and insulted whenI politely decline their help. Then they go and say 'Fine if you won't be happy on your own I will make happy for you.' And they go to great lengths to try and 'cheer me up' and 'what's wrong Trick would you like to talk about it?' And I say no thank, and suddenly it is "I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW SELFISH YOU ARE TRICK FOR REFUSING MY HELP YOU ARE THE WORST PERSON EVER."
And I am like '...huh? Did you say something?"
"DAMNIT TRICK WHY ARE YOU NOT ACKNOWLEDGING AND APPRECIATING ALL THE EFFORTS I HAVE GONE TO HELP YOU WHEN YOU DIDN'T ASK FOR IT YOU ARE SUCH A SELFISH ASSHOLE!"
I do my utmost to be a kind and considerate and gentle person, and people continually accuse me and label me as being not a kind and considerate and gentle person, and they ask why are you not a kind and considerable and gentle person, and then when I ask what I am doing wrong please tell me so I can see my flaws and try to improve or rectify them, they are like 'ugh you should already know what you have done wrong why are you so arrogant and self-centered Trick I will not help you in any way because you are so pathetic and worthless at this you have no chance to survive make your time and it's like...
I feel like it is like 'hey I went to college and studied hard and got honours degree in thinking about other people see my diploma?' and people respond with 'Why did you not study and earn honours degrees in people's feelings? Why are you so self-centered and arrogant Trick why do you not think about other's feelings ever why are you such a big jerk it always has to be about you' and then they go to their friends and are like 'hey there asshole racist Nazi baby-murderer' and the other person is like 'Hee you are so funny for insulting me I love you forever, let's cuddle!"
And I stand there like a post, saying nothing, because I know if I used such insulting language I would immediately be pointed out as being THE HUGE BITCH NOBODY IS A BIGGER ASSHOLE THAN TRICK SERIOUSLY YOU ARE WORSE THAN THAT GUY WHO HAD THE FUNNY LITTLE MOUSTACHE WHY DO YOU NOT REALIZE THAT PEOPLE HATE YOUR VERY EXISTENCE.
Then there are people who immediately pounce upon me, if I should say a single word in my defence. 'Gosh Trick shut up already why are you dragging this on why can't you let this go, can't you see how posting like two sentences in defence of yourself is dragging this argument through the coals at warp speed SERIOUSLY TRICK SHUT UP.
And everyone goes to soothe said 'victim' while I am here being all 'buh And when I politely ask to know what I did wrong, so I can improve myself in the future.' And people are like 'jeez Trick you're such an asshole, why are you a jerk to everyone? Why does this always revolve around yourself, you are so utterly selfish and egotistical and arrogant for wanting to make other people's lives feel better, what the hell Trick, why are you such a douchebag IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT YOU."
it is like there is no throttle at all, we are either at warp speed or full stop.
I just don't understand.
And I am probably going to get told 'why is everything always about you Trick' just for posting that I am always constantly concerned and appreciative of others' feelings and needs and desires. I am the only person I can directly control, it would be rude for me to tell others what to think and feel, yet they do so to me and label me as angry and hateful when I am like 'dude I love everyone you are the best you guys' 'UGH STOP SAYING THAT TRICK YOU ARE A TERRIBLE AWFUL PERSON I HATE YOU ERROR CODE 20 BLOCK IGNORE'
I just want to make people happy and feel their lives are better. This seems to be the worst possible insult to some people. I don't understand what I am doing wrong.
Trust me, I'm an engineer what the fuck am I doing here?
Trust me, I'm an engineer, I am the man who arranges the blocks.
So here it goes. And while these interactions are exaggerated to better show the details and effects, this is really not too far from what people are like with my interactions.
The Trick Manifesto
I am here to write sexy things for people to make them happy and/or masturbate. I ask for little in return because I gain more personal satisfaction at seeing them enjoy my gifts to them without charge.
I do not come here to talk about my real life problems, I want to get away from them, yet people keep asking me how I feel and when I respond they are like 'why is it always about you'.
I do not want to talk about my feelings, but people ask how I am. Even in the literal sense, not the proverbial 'hey what's up' kind of why. They continue and repeatedly try to ask about my feelings. I don't understand why people are angered when I give them what they asked so many times for.
They accuse me of being selfish when I tell them my honest feelings, that it is all about you Trick, that you want to have this pity party all for yourself when I asked 38 times how are you feeling, gah Trick why is it whenever we talk it's about you?
And I further confused because I did not volunteer or offer such emotions in the first place, now I am labelled selfish when I tell people my emotions after they ask so many times?
Then they accuse me of wanting to play the victim. How could you be so callous and self-centered, Trick, why is everything always about you? People think that they are so valuable and that denying me interaction is the ultimate insult YAY I WIN FOREVER TRICK THE FOX WHO DIDN'T EVEN SHOW UP IS THE LOSEREST LOSER EVER. That'll show Trick! I will go to extensive lengths of effort in order to make sure I do not receive contact from them again HA HA I WIN FOREVER YOU LOSE TRICK
And meanwhile I'm just sitting on the park bench outside the stadium being all... 'Eh maybe I won't go the football game today, there'll be another soon' and shrug my shoulders and just wander off. It's not like there won't be more football games, why is this one so special? SPOILER ALERT: It's not.
MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE BAT CAVE I MEAN THIS GUY'S BASEMENT
The other person is giddily gleefully taking like, all the time in the world going on about how he has blocked me and isn't that the greatest? I am sol great and important, look at me now. Damnit, Trick, why don't you appreciate the effort I took to remove you from my life?
It is like they want to imagine 'I am the center of their universe' and when I do not act such way, well, we'll just call you that anyway. Gosh, Trick why are you so selfish, caring about other's feelings and not your own?
Like they want to let me know how important I am to their very existence, that I should be grovelling and begging just to spend time with them. Don't you realize, Trick, what a great dishonour and lost opportunity it is for you, me denying you the chance to roleplay with me? Don't you see that?
Meanwhile, I'm sipping some Diet Pepsi (Coke Sucks There I Said It) and am working on writing, or videoing, or whatever the Fox does best.
They act as if this is the ULTIMATE INSULT FOREVER and look at me Trick, look at what great lengths I have gone to remove you.
And I am like, "Huh? Whatever, sure, you really aren't that special to me. I mean I respect your needs and wants and desires, I am patient with you when you disappear or such, I don't let it bother me because those things are in the past, and I would like to look forward to a fun and exciting future with you."
These people really think that I am so obsessed with them that I would die or kill myself if they were not around, YEAH TAKE THAT TRICK. When it is like... these people are of such little importance, sometimes I even forget their names and sometimes forget why they are mad at me.
That's a fun one. 'Hello character I have not approached before, you look sexy and interesting, would you like to roleplay?' "DAMNIT TRICK HOW CAN YOU BE SO CALLOUS AND UNCARING JUST RUDE AND INSULTING TO APPROACH ME AGAIN FOR RP CLEARLY YOU SHOULD KNOW WHO I AM BECAUSE I HAVE AN ALTAR IN MY COMPUTER ROOM DEDICATED TO YOU."
I am like 'huh? Do I know you?" And they are like "Isn't it obvious who this is why do you not have a ginormous rolodex with all my alts so that you should know how much I hate you for some reason across all the universe because I am that important.
So I ask 'okay, sure, if you hate me that much, just tell me who you are and I shall endeavour to avoid you in the future. It is just polite after all, I do not want to bring up old feelings.'
"GOD DAMNIT TRICK YOU SHOULD KNOW WHO I AM AND YOU SHOULD KNOW ALL 37,000 OF MY ALTS WHAT THE FOX TRICK WHY ARE YOU SO STUPID AND dumb, how selfish can you be to not know intrinsically all my alternate characters already? Why are you so self-centered?"
"Damnit, Trick, how can you be so arrogant as to not pay attention to me and the great lengths and efforts I have gone through to remove you from my life, how can you be so selfish!"
"Trick, you asshole, how have you not picked up on the tiny little clues and hints over this time that I do not really like this roleplay and I am only doing it to make you happy. Why are you so demanding in that you should ask me for what I would really like to do? How can you be so selfish, always asking others what they would like and what pleases them. You are a terrible person, Trick. Your emotions are invalid and meaningless so I will stamp all over them in front of you, how does that feel?"
"I just want to make you happy."
"UGH TRICK WHY ARE YOU STILL BEING SO ARROGANT AND SELFISH! WHY ARE YOU NOT LETTING ME HELP YOU WITH YOUR OWN EMOTIONS I AM SO UTTERLY INVESTED IN THEM FOR SOME REASON."
Especially when I do not volunteer such information myself. I do not want to talk about my feelings or emotions, I don't consider them important.
I just want to write the sexy talk. Being a friend is not my primary goal. The interests we share should be in liking me writing big damn prose about sexy foxes and shit, I really do not care about your personal life because I am here to interact with your character, but I respect and appreciate your desires and needs and whatever happens in real life is more important.
And then I am told 'why do you not respect other people's feelings Trick' and it confuses the fox.
Confuse, not anger.
The fox is never angry. No matter how many times people tell him to be, there is really very little that angers or upsets the Trick Fox. And I don't understand why people want to see me as angry and bitter and frustrated and a jerk to other people, when that is the antithesis of my existence when I am all those things to myself because I don't believe my emotions are worth anything compared to others.
That I want to please you and make you happy and smile and that's all, and then people get angry at me, telling me I am selfish for wanting to do what they want, and arrogant and such, and that I am not thinking about other people's feelings when I am only thinking about other people's feelings and not my own, and they get further enraged at me when they try to help me and I say 'no thanks' why is that?
Why are other people allowed to offer support and suggestions for improvement to me, and when I kindly ask them to not worry about my feelings, it is such a grievous insult to their very core?
How is caring about other people's feelings selfish? There is literally no one else that treats me as badly as myself. I don't need anyone else's help to make me feel miserable, I am fine on my own.
I think and feel I deserve this, that this is what I should get for being a terrible person. But it is like when people go 'let me cheer you up Trick how can I help' and I say 'Thanks for the offer but I do not wish to be helped', they react as if I had just raped and killed their mother?
That it is such a personal affront to politely not accept others' help? It is like 'Hey Trick here's $20 you should go buy a nice meal' 'Naw I can afford it myself.' 'FINE THEN NOBODY SHOULD EVER USE THIS MONEY EVER' and they burn it right in front of me and tell me I'm selfish and biased and self-centered for not accepting their offer.
It just doesn't make sense to me.
People get outrageously offended and insulted whenI politely decline their help. Then they go and say 'Fine if you won't be happy on your own I will make happy for you.' And they go to great lengths to try and 'cheer me up' and 'what's wrong Trick would you like to talk about it?' And I say no thank, and suddenly it is "I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW SELFISH YOU ARE TRICK FOR REFUSING MY HELP YOU ARE THE WORST PERSON EVER."
And I am like '...huh? Did you say something?"
"DAMNIT TRICK WHY ARE YOU NOT ACKNOWLEDGING AND APPRECIATING ALL THE EFFORTS I HAVE GONE TO HELP YOU WHEN YOU DIDN'T ASK FOR IT YOU ARE SUCH A SELFISH ASSHOLE!"
I do my utmost to be a kind and considerate and gentle person, and people continually accuse me and label me as being not a kind and considerate and gentle person, and they ask why are you not a kind and considerable and gentle person, and then when I ask what I am doing wrong please tell me so I can see my flaws and try to improve or rectify them, they are like 'ugh you should already know what you have done wrong why are you so arrogant and self-centered Trick I will not help you in any way because you are so pathetic and worthless at this you have no chance to survive make your time and it's like...
I feel like it is like 'hey I went to college and studied hard and got honours degree in thinking about other people see my diploma?' and people respond with 'Why did you not study and earn honours degrees in people's feelings? Why are you so self-centered and arrogant Trick why do you not think about other's feelings ever why are you such a big jerk it always has to be about you' and then they go to their friends and are like 'hey there asshole racist Nazi baby-murderer' and the other person is like 'Hee you are so funny for insulting me I love you forever, let's cuddle!"
And I stand there like a post, saying nothing, because I know if I used such insulting language I would immediately be pointed out as being THE HUGE BITCH NOBODY IS A BIGGER ASSHOLE THAN TRICK SERIOUSLY YOU ARE WORSE THAN THAT GUY WHO HAD THE FUNNY LITTLE MOUSTACHE WHY DO YOU NOT REALIZE THAT PEOPLE HATE YOUR VERY EXISTENCE.
Then there are people who immediately pounce upon me, if I should say a single word in my defence. 'Gosh Trick shut up already why are you dragging this on why can't you let this go, can't you see how posting like two sentences in defence of yourself is dragging this argument through the coals at warp speed SERIOUSLY TRICK SHUT UP.
And everyone goes to soothe said 'victim' while I am here being all 'buh And when I politely ask to know what I did wrong, so I can improve myself in the future.' And people are like 'jeez Trick you're such an asshole, why are you a jerk to everyone? Why does this always revolve around yourself, you are so utterly selfish and egotistical and arrogant for wanting to make other people's lives feel better, what the hell Trick, why are you such a douchebag IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT YOU."
it is like there is no throttle at all, we are either at warp speed or full stop.
I just don't understand.
And I am probably going to get told 'why is everything always about you Trick' just for posting that I am always constantly concerned and appreciative of others' feelings and needs and desires. I am the only person I can directly control, it would be rude for me to tell others what to think and feel, yet they do so to me and label me as angry and hateful when I am like 'dude I love everyone you are the best you guys' 'UGH STOP SAYING THAT TRICK YOU ARE A TERRIBLE AWFUL PERSON I HATE YOU ERROR CODE 20 BLOCK IGNORE'
I just want to make people happy and feel their lives are better. This seems to be the worst possible insult to some people. I don't understand what I am doing wrong.
Trust me, I'm an engineer what the fuck am I doing here?
Trust me, I'm an engineer, I am the man who arranges the blocks.
Harley Hyena
~sleeves1991
Some people just aren't compatible with each other I guess.
-F74M3F0X
~-f74m3f0x
You know, Trick, I've had people tell me they don't like me, and it's fine. I just read a lot of your other journal entries and I'd just like to point out that there are people in this community who care about you. People will be dicks, and it sucks when they are because it makes people just feel bad, in any version of it. But I want you to maybe re-read some of those comments on your old journals and remember that people care. And I'll throw my own two cents in. You were one of the first people I saw when I was becoming interested in the fandom. Your works of writing, the community you shared from art and friends all was inspiring and uplifting. I recently have been trying to get more involved in the furry fandom partly because I saw how you enjoyed it, and others too. And you write some damn good pieces, many of which are hilarious and thought provoking! I'll end by suggesting you listen to Somewhere Over the Rainbow by "IZ" Kamakawiwoʻole. You've probably heard it, and it's a little melancholy, so if you don't need that right now ignore this suggestion. I DO suggest it, however, because it is hopeful as well, and calming, that moment when the tears on your face start to slow and you wipe them away. It speaks of wanting to continue on and go forwards in life, physically and personally. And from what I gather from your journals and this post, it certainly seems like you are constantly trying to better yourself and engage with others, making them happy, which makes you happy. In my opinion, that is a mark of a good person. I'll post this in the other place too.
TrickTheFox
∞trickthefox
OP
F74M3F0X is a cool guy, he writes the posts that make teh fox happy and doesm't afraid of anyone.
Amur_Tiger
~amurtiger
Just remember Godwin's law Trick, when *Rando2017* compares you ( or almost anything ) to Hitler they have clearly lost any grip on reality and/or ( probably and ) any grip on history.
TrickTheFox
∞trickthefox
OP
Thank you for your support. Gosh I don't understand how these people are so lacking in perspective...
