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🐺 It's a journal! (And a messy one!) 🐺
8 years ago
My inconsistency in posting journal updates has been established ages ago, therefore I spare you a dozen reasons why I’m like that (tl;dr – I’m unorganised mess). In the spirit of my infrequent updates, here’s another one!
This year just flew by for me. Most of the time I’ve spent either at work or in the car which slightly affected my non-existent social life. I’ve got to the point where I wasn’t doing anything else but working. Thankfully, due to the ‘generosity’ of my company, I’ve got a MASSIVE pay-cut and now I can work closer to home for few days a week. It gives me some space to do the things I should but so far, I’m happily wasting it on World of Warcraft (again…).
On a more positive note, I’ve got another year older and had a quite eventful birthday party this year. So much has happened during that weekend that I’m still processing everything! Booze, sex, friends, drama – whole package! If I would start listing everything here, it would probably take another few pages and then barely anyone would believe it anyway. But hit me up if you’re interested in the full story!
I’m still trying to find myself in the world. Looking for that motivational ‘kick in the ass’ that would get me going but the more I’m waiting for it, the more I realise that it will never happen. All the plans, ideas, things to do. It’s all collecting dust on the shelf labelled ‘someday’. Feels like I’m living in the trap of my own making, where I understand that if I would start doing a little bit every day, despite how hard it is, it would get a little bit easier every day. But I just need to keep doing it, which is the part that I can’t stick to.
Maybe it’s depression talking or just my usual, incoherent rambling. But I feel that I’m reaching the point where I really want to get out from all this mess that I keep creating and start channelling this energy into something enjoyable.
And with age I've got really hard time to figure out what I really am. Am I dog, wolf, lion, yeen, bull, rat or who knows what! Too much want, to little commission money and writing skill!
Also, writing journals sucks! But it helps
To the next one!
~Elath
This year just flew by for me. Most of the time I’ve spent either at work or in the car which slightly affected my non-existent social life. I’ve got to the point where I wasn’t doing anything else but working. Thankfully, due to the ‘generosity’ of my company, I’ve got a MASSIVE pay-cut and now I can work closer to home for few days a week. It gives me some space to do the things I should but so far, I’m happily wasting it on World of Warcraft (again…).
On a more positive note, I’ve got another year older and had a quite eventful birthday party this year. So much has happened during that weekend that I’m still processing everything! Booze, sex, friends, drama – whole package! If I would start listing everything here, it would probably take another few pages and then barely anyone would believe it anyway. But hit me up if you’re interested in the full story!
I’m still trying to find myself in the world. Looking for that motivational ‘kick in the ass’ that would get me going but the more I’m waiting for it, the more I realise that it will never happen. All the plans, ideas, things to do. It’s all collecting dust on the shelf labelled ‘someday’. Feels like I’m living in the trap of my own making, where I understand that if I would start doing a little bit every day, despite how hard it is, it would get a little bit easier every day. But I just need to keep doing it, which is the part that I can’t stick to.
Maybe it’s depression talking or just my usual, incoherent rambling. But I feel that I’m reaching the point where I really want to get out from all this mess that I keep creating and start channelling this energy into something enjoyable.
And with age I've got really hard time to figure out what I really am. Am I dog, wolf, lion, yeen, bull, rat or who knows what! Too much want, to little commission money and writing skill!
Also, writing journals sucks! But it helps
To the next one!
~Elath
