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8 years ago
Taken from 
chrysisi
1: What did you do last year that you'd never done before?
Started to cook for myself, meals that are more intense that adding milk to cereal in a bowl? Adding hot water to instant noodles? I bought an "Instant Pot" pressure cooker and it lives up to it's reviews on Amazon. I absolutely love it. Meals taste wonderful with it.
2: Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for this year?
I don't make them, to be honest.
3: Did anyone close to you give birth?
Uh, yeah, my army buddy's daughter gave birth.
4: Did anyone close to you die?
No, thankfully.
5: What countries did you visit?
None and no desire to honestly XD I love the USA, I have everything here, including freedom.
6: What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017?
The woman that God has for me, wherever she is. It's pointless, I feel, to keep hoping, I will meet her when I am ready.
7: What dates from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
No dates. It was a hard, hard, hard year for me in many ways, but a year of painful growth.
8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Built a million dollar house for a client. Learned some valuable new skills! Did some things I have never done before, learned a lot. Improved my skillset.
9: What was your biggest failure?
Struggling so much when I just need to trust God. Struggling needlessly.
10: Did you suffer illness or injury?
No, thank God. I have never been happier or healthier. No wait what am I saying XD I sprained my hip and had to learn to walk again XD That was no fun and it still hurts but not so bad I am unable to walk.
11: What was the best thing you bought?
The Instant Pot =D
12: Whose behaviour merited celebration?
My close, close friends. There aren't many, but I am grateful they are in my life.
13: Whose behaviour made you appalled?
Some world leaders. You know who you are.
14: Where did most of your money go?
Food! I am finally starting to eat healthy. It's expensive!!! But worth it. Also alcohol, but I am doing better in controlling it. Hard times.
15: What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The idea of spending my life with a woman. I have had so many heart breaks and setbacks. And I have struggles I desperately wish I didn't have. But all of the pain has molded me into a stronger person. But do I want to hold someone in my arms, and watch a sunset? A sunrise? Go camping with her? Play music for her on my guitar... Write stories for her... Listen to her, and just hold her in my arms and love her with all my spirit? Well, yeah...
16: What song(s) will always remind you of 2017?
IDK TBH.
17: Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder?, b) thinner or fatter?, c) richer or poorer?
I am much, much happier. Like way. I have my ups and downs... I am glad I am off all prescription drugs! Haven't been on them in at least 15 years. (Aside from pain killers when I sprained my hip and couldn't walk for a few weeks.)
I am friggin crazy blessed! I have land, trailers, trucks, motorcycles, quads, tools. I even have a diesel tractor!!!! (Oh my goshhhh yessss) The satisfaction I get from owning a tractor is just... ohmygosh. The best.)
18: What do you wish you'd done more of?
Drawing. I am disappointed in myself. Drawing for me is... emotionally traumatic. Because I have the Mona Lisa in my mind and heart, and what comes out... Looks like something a preschooler drew. I know the only cure is to draw more... Maybe I am going through too much right now. Maybe the storms need to calm before I can take on more trauma
19: What do you wish you'd done less of?
Being so worried about stuff. Especially money. And worrying that God was mad/didn't love me. How I feel has no bearing on reality. More people need to be aware of that fact. Emotions do not equal truth, or reality. Some times, but not always.
20: How did you spend Christmas?
With a friend. I was working on a story that morning and really wanted to write XD It almost ruined my Christmas.
21: Did you fall in love in 2017?
Nope. I fell more in love with my dogs, actually, and I did ask God to help me understand them and love them more. I don't mean in a perverted sense, I have to clarify that, I can not and do not condone bestiality XD Sorry I had to say it. And if you struggle with it, God has healing for you.
I mean in an emotional/spiritual sense. My dogs are such pure hearted beings. All they have is pure, selfless love in their hearts. And it's beautiful to be close to that, to hold them in my arms and feel so close to such a pure being. It's just wonderful.
One day I hope to feel that for another human being.
22: What were your favourite TV shows?
MST3K!!!!!!!!!!! I haven't laughed so much in my life XD
23: Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
LOL no. Some leaders of countries still haven't learned that life NEVER ends well for dictators. But I know that some of the things a part of me wants, don't end well, either. SO we're all kind of damaged. But people who cause other people to suffer, I do not like that. People who hurt animals, too. It's so needless.
24: What was the best book you read?
I uh... For as much as I write, I just don't read. The last novel I read was years ago. I have tried to read again, even purchased books, but I usually never get passed a few pages. I just can't. I don't know why. It's a big block in my head. I would much rather write. I don't know what's wrong with me.
25: What was your greatest musical discovery?
Christian hip hop. I am not kidding lol. NF is pretty edgy, but I like his stuff. I like it when Christians are honest and open and don't hold back. In America we are supposed to put on a good Christian face and pretend everything is fine- when it's not. And God doesn't want us to hold it all in.
26: What did you want and get?
That tractor >.>
27: What did you want and not get?
My life mate. The woman God has been exhaustively preparing my heart, mind, and soul for. The woman I will share my life with.
28: What were your favourite films of this year?
There were a few, and I've forgotten them all =D The Hobbit? I like Rogue One, too. It was a hard movie but had a good message.
29: What one thing made your year?
The tractor -_- Oh my gosh I can't stop talking about. I'm sorry.
30: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017?
"Derelict" "Holey" "I feel sorry for you, Dave, so here's some clothes" I made good money but looked homeless doing it XD I really REALLY REALLY need to buy bulk white tshirts, and bulk jeans, and just have those two things in my closet.
31: What kept you sane?
My dogs. They are my sweet babies. Writing. Getting out all the stress and broken ness. It mends a broken heart slightly, it does. Camping, and reconnecting with nature. Alcohol, yes, I am honest. It helps to escape sometimes, but I recognize it can also lead to trouble. Riding my motorcycle, riding my quad. Riding my streetbike in the dirt =D Jumping it, just a little.
32: What political issues stirred you the most?
The people who think they have good ideas, but who's ideas have never worked in history. Ever. In fact millions of people die when their ideas are followed through to the end. Like, do you even know what happens when you go through with those things?
The people who are puffed up, and hurt/kill others. Who cause people suffering. Who imprison people just for their beliefs. There's enough suffering in this world without y'all making more of it. Things can be good. Things are progressing. The times we live in, have ACTUALLY never been better! And we can continue, as a world, to even BETTER things! But no. People have to go and screw it up. And it pisses me off =D
33: Who did you miss?
My best friend, Bruce.
34: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017.
Stop worrying about stuff. Relax in God's Provision. I just spent more money in food than I ever have in my life, I am out of work, but I know it's going to be alright. I learned that even though I can be completely vexed and afraid, it doesn't change the grip on me that Jesus has. You, too, can have this provision in your life, all you have to do is ask Jesus for a relationship =D
35: Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"It won't last forever!" Impending Doom- another band I discovered and LOVE!
=D
chrysisi1: What did you do last year that you'd never done before?
Started to cook for myself, meals that are more intense that adding milk to cereal in a bowl? Adding hot water to instant noodles? I bought an "Instant Pot" pressure cooker and it lives up to it's reviews on Amazon. I absolutely love it. Meals taste wonderful with it.
2: Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for this year?
I don't make them, to be honest.
3: Did anyone close to you give birth?
Uh, yeah, my army buddy's daughter gave birth.
4: Did anyone close to you die?
No, thankfully.
5: What countries did you visit?
None and no desire to honestly XD I love the USA, I have everything here, including freedom.
6: What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked in 2017?
The woman that God has for me, wherever she is. It's pointless, I feel, to keep hoping, I will meet her when I am ready.
7: What dates from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
No dates. It was a hard, hard, hard year for me in many ways, but a year of painful growth.
8: What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Built a million dollar house for a client. Learned some valuable new skills! Did some things I have never done before, learned a lot. Improved my skillset.
9: What was your biggest failure?
Struggling so much when I just need to trust God. Struggling needlessly.
10: Did you suffer illness or injury?
No, thank God. I have never been happier or healthier. No wait what am I saying XD I sprained my hip and had to learn to walk again XD That was no fun and it still hurts but not so bad I am unable to walk.
11: What was the best thing you bought?
The Instant Pot =D
12: Whose behaviour merited celebration?
My close, close friends. There aren't many, but I am grateful they are in my life.
13: Whose behaviour made you appalled?
Some world leaders. You know who you are.
14: Where did most of your money go?
Food! I am finally starting to eat healthy. It's expensive!!! But worth it. Also alcohol, but I am doing better in controlling it. Hard times.
15: What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The idea of spending my life with a woman. I have had so many heart breaks and setbacks. And I have struggles I desperately wish I didn't have. But all of the pain has molded me into a stronger person. But do I want to hold someone in my arms, and watch a sunset? A sunrise? Go camping with her? Play music for her on my guitar... Write stories for her... Listen to her, and just hold her in my arms and love her with all my spirit? Well, yeah...
16: What song(s) will always remind you of 2017?
IDK TBH.
17: Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder?, b) thinner or fatter?, c) richer or poorer?
I am much, much happier. Like way. I have my ups and downs... I am glad I am off all prescription drugs! Haven't been on them in at least 15 years. (Aside from pain killers when I sprained my hip and couldn't walk for a few weeks.)
I am friggin crazy blessed! I have land, trailers, trucks, motorcycles, quads, tools. I even have a diesel tractor!!!! (Oh my goshhhh yessss) The satisfaction I get from owning a tractor is just... ohmygosh. The best.)
18: What do you wish you'd done more of?
Drawing. I am disappointed in myself. Drawing for me is... emotionally traumatic. Because I have the Mona Lisa in my mind and heart, and what comes out... Looks like something a preschooler drew. I know the only cure is to draw more... Maybe I am going through too much right now. Maybe the storms need to calm before I can take on more trauma
19: What do you wish you'd done less of?
Being so worried about stuff. Especially money. And worrying that God was mad/didn't love me. How I feel has no bearing on reality. More people need to be aware of that fact. Emotions do not equal truth, or reality. Some times, but not always.
20: How did you spend Christmas?
With a friend. I was working on a story that morning and really wanted to write XD It almost ruined my Christmas.
21: Did you fall in love in 2017?
Nope. I fell more in love with my dogs, actually, and I did ask God to help me understand them and love them more. I don't mean in a perverted sense, I have to clarify that, I can not and do not condone bestiality XD Sorry I had to say it. And if you struggle with it, God has healing for you.
I mean in an emotional/spiritual sense. My dogs are such pure hearted beings. All they have is pure, selfless love in their hearts. And it's beautiful to be close to that, to hold them in my arms and feel so close to such a pure being. It's just wonderful.
One day I hope to feel that for another human being.
22: What were your favourite TV shows?
MST3K!!!!!!!!!!! I haven't laughed so much in my life XD
23: Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
LOL no. Some leaders of countries still haven't learned that life NEVER ends well for dictators. But I know that some of the things a part of me wants, don't end well, either. SO we're all kind of damaged. But people who cause other people to suffer, I do not like that. People who hurt animals, too. It's so needless.
24: What was the best book you read?
I uh... For as much as I write, I just don't read. The last novel I read was years ago. I have tried to read again, even purchased books, but I usually never get passed a few pages. I just can't. I don't know why. It's a big block in my head. I would much rather write. I don't know what's wrong with me.
25: What was your greatest musical discovery?
Christian hip hop. I am not kidding lol. NF is pretty edgy, but I like his stuff. I like it when Christians are honest and open and don't hold back. In America we are supposed to put on a good Christian face and pretend everything is fine- when it's not. And God doesn't want us to hold it all in.
26: What did you want and get?
That tractor >.>
27: What did you want and not get?
My life mate. The woman God has been exhaustively preparing my heart, mind, and soul for. The woman I will share my life with.
28: What were your favourite films of this year?
There were a few, and I've forgotten them all =D The Hobbit? I like Rogue One, too. It was a hard movie but had a good message.
29: What one thing made your year?
The tractor -_- Oh my gosh I can't stop talking about. I'm sorry.
30: How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017?
"Derelict" "Holey" "I feel sorry for you, Dave, so here's some clothes" I made good money but looked homeless doing it XD I really REALLY REALLY need to buy bulk white tshirts, and bulk jeans, and just have those two things in my closet.
31: What kept you sane?
My dogs. They are my sweet babies. Writing. Getting out all the stress and broken ness. It mends a broken heart slightly, it does. Camping, and reconnecting with nature. Alcohol, yes, I am honest. It helps to escape sometimes, but I recognize it can also lead to trouble. Riding my motorcycle, riding my quad. Riding my streetbike in the dirt =D Jumping it, just a little.
32: What political issues stirred you the most?
The people who think they have good ideas, but who's ideas have never worked in history. Ever. In fact millions of people die when their ideas are followed through to the end. Like, do you even know what happens when you go through with those things?
The people who are puffed up, and hurt/kill others. Who cause people suffering. Who imprison people just for their beliefs. There's enough suffering in this world without y'all making more of it. Things can be good. Things are progressing. The times we live in, have ACTUALLY never been better! And we can continue, as a world, to even BETTER things! But no. People have to go and screw it up. And it pisses me off =D
33: Who did you miss?
My best friend, Bruce.
34: Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017.
Stop worrying about stuff. Relax in God's Provision. I just spent more money in food than I ever have in my life, I am out of work, but I know it's going to be alright. I learned that even though I can be completely vexed and afraid, it doesn't change the grip on me that Jesus has. You, too, can have this provision in your life, all you have to do is ask Jesus for a relationship =D
35: Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"It won't last forever!" Impending Doom- another band I discovered and LOVE!
=D
Number 2 easiest meal in the world. Tortellinis. They are kinda like Ravioli but better IMO. Go buy a bag of frozen Tortellinis in the store. They usually come in meat or cheese tortellini. Boil a pot of water, Throw them in. When the float, they're done. Serve with your favorite pasta sauce. (Ragu, etc) Alfredo sauce is also good over Tortellinis.
If you feel a bit more adventurous, I have a meatloaf recipe that pretty easy to make. You have to buy a few more ingredients in the beginning but it makes a really tasty meatloaf and you can eat on it for a few days. Totally worth it.
Meatloaf
1 ½ lbs ground beef
½ cup seasoned bread crumbs (or combination of oat bran and bread crumbs)
1 egg
1 cup milk
1 small onion, chopped (about ¼ cup)
1 Tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
½ teaspoon Seasoned Salt
½ teaspoon dry mustard
¼ teaspoon Seasoned Pepper (or regular pepper)
¼ teaspoon rubbed sage
1/8 teaspoon garlic powder
½ cup barbecue sauce (or favorite sauce combo)
Mix all ingredients except barbecue sauce.
Shape into loaf in ungreased rectangular pan (13x9).
Spoon barbecue sauce over top.
Bake in 350 oven until done, 1 to 1 ¼ hours
Enjoy!
I remember buying a can of Manwich, and being utterly disappointed the meat wasn't already mixed in XD
FYI, those little one dollar packages of rice sides by Knorr? They are pure win. I crack two eggs in with each one, some salt, and only water (I am allergic to milk) and put them into the Instant Pot for the prescribed time. Comes out amazing! I used to simmer them and stir them, cook time is 7-10 minutes but man. What a meal for a dollar and a little more for the eggs.
My personal favorite is the cheddar broccoli. It was all I was eating for a while LOL
They also came out with a "Deluxe" version of the packet sides, it is 70c more per unit, but the flavoring is a little better/richer. You should give it a try, they're really good... And thank you for the suggestions, I will try them!
Oh, also a thing I like to do is put pizza in the oven and have it drowning in cheese LOL.I salt it when it's done. I know I have a high salt intake but I also am very physically active/get a ton of exercise. I also have low blood pressure so the salt helps, plus it's nice when things actually taste good XD The blandness of food these days is such a turn off.
Also, if you are lactose intolerant something to remember is that most AGED cheeses are generally tolerated well by people who are lactose intolerant. My doctor explained that during the aging process it reduces the amount of lactose in the cheese. I eat a slice of CoJack or Swiss on my sandwich every day at lunch and have no problems. American, however will ignite a two shitstorm in my colon. Stay far, far away.
Another easy meal is a Pork Tenderloin (baked) These are OMG delicious. https://www.walmart.com/ip/Smithfie.....rloin/22210431 All you have to do is open the package and bake them in a dish for the specified amount of time it tells on the package. They are quite good and easy to make. Love the seasonings. They have different flavors too.
Good luck!
Unfortunately many Western Christians feel the need to put on a fake smile, and pretend everything is fine. I am so over that attitude I just can't. My mentor moved out of state recently and told me he admired that I was real. When shit sucks, I say it sucks, there's no point in pretending otherwise.
There's something freeing in telling God, "OK God, here I am, a total failure. I don't have any more reasons, or excuses, just a broken heart and a broken soul." And God goes, "OK." He wants us to be real.
If there is a benevolent God at all, I'd think he'd be cool with the fact I tell him he's a cunt every day. Sometimes I'll praise him and pray still, but my prayers, when I do have them, are less "Dear God in Heaven..." and more "Alright you gigantic cosmic voyeur, if you're really out there and you have any semblance of competence or compassion..."
I really really really fucking hate organized religion after leaving it in the last year. The good thing about your take on Christianity? You're able to make it more of a genuine relationship if God's actually there to begin with, as opposed to getting corralled into some garishly biege church full of superstitious old people who can't face reality.
I have been there, bro. Just yesterday I was gritting my teeth after questioning what was going on in areas of my life where I'm trusting Him. A few times the anger went through my heart, "God do You have even an ounce of mercy or compassion for me??" (in this area of life) Yeah man honestly I feel you.
Yeah organized religion is useless. What should be encouraged is an actual relationship with God and Jesus. And maybe acknowledge that st times struggling to hold onto our relationship with God is sometimes the hardest thing we will ever do.
When you've been through the things I've been through it's hard to find people you can relate to, honestly, even in church. And many don't like me because I refuse to plaster a fake smile on my face.
I can tell you that God is real. Life is hard and even though we end up strong through the trials, when we are going through them, it feels like God is cruel, but He never leaves us.
Then there's the whole Christian idea of suffering making one pure... one thing to go through trials, it's another to literally tell dying kids to stop coughing... I've literally seen Christians treat sick people the same way they treat the mentally ill.
Only way I'm going back to church is with my best friend. She's a transgender Ron Paul-style libertarian with left-wing sympathies, so she's cool with my anarcho-communist ass. I'm the Bloody Red Baron, bitches. She goes to a liberal church that'll tolerate my misotheism I think.
Jesus is always welcome to be my trip sitter and toking buddy.
For God never leaving us, he seems incredibly distant for a deity that's supposedly so close.
I will tell you the truth, God is a Master of breaking people. There is a reason you are here, posting this and talking to me.
We have free will, free to give God the finger, free to torture and murder people, free to put cancer causing chemicals into the ground to seep into the water tables.
Why do you think doctors ask their patients if they have a "history" of things like cancer? Because curses, like blessings are passed down in bloodlines, in genetic code, because people are free to do what they want.
If God stopped this then we'd be nothing more than robots. We'd have a big cosmic father always forcing us to do the right thing, so that we never erred or did wrong. No. We have free will and the ability to do what we want, INCLUDING destroying the lives of other people.
It's funny you mention red communism, because it is red... red with the blood of the hundreds of millions who died horrible deaths... And why? Because a handful of free-willed assholes decided they wanted power and control, and forced their ideology on a population, murder millions of men, women, and children, usually through starvation, which is a slow, lingering horror of a way to die. Not just once, but everywhere where Communism and socialism have ever been implemented unchecked.
It's not suffering that makes us pure, plenty of people suffer for no reason. It is the trial by fire that makes us pure, the twisting in helpless futility until we turn back to God, to what is right, forsaking what seems pleasurable but what is ultimately empty, and facing the void of sorrow, until it begins to make sense.
I can tell you, that you are a miserable person, because you are rebelling against God. You are going to stay miserable, until you suck it up, and take the narrow road, the hard road, and allow God to burn you in the furnace of His refining fire, the fire of agony, of frustration, and finally of surrender, to the Way, the perfect Way, that has little reward at first.
As Christians you should know that we are human beings too, just like you. Just because we embark on a journey with Christ, does not mean we have automatically achieved perfection. We make mistakes, we screw up, we screw up so bad some times it staggers the imagination. But in the end we are just flawed people. Jesus said He came to save the flawed, the broken. People who are screwed up and don't know what to do any more with themselves. I was once told, the only reason people are in church, is because they are screwed up!
The most merciful thing God can do with hard cases like you and me is to utterly destroy us, destroy what we thought we knew, and bring us to accept His way. And, my friend, this may likely be in your future. Of course, you're not going to read this and suddenly say, "Oh gosh, Dave, you're right, let me just change my thinking..." You're going to call me a foolish and ignorant. And that's fine.
But one day you are going to face the end of yourself... The end of the drugs, the end of your anarchistic thinking and ways, you are going to realize the end of it is nothing but death... And in that day, the God who is so distant will be there, for you.
This honestly sounds like the exact fucking thinki9ng my former family friend used to FUCKING BRAINWASH ME. Honestly? I thought you were sane but now you sound like just another fundamentalist.
You're still a shitty person, you just use Christianity as a mask to cover how shitty you really are. You changed on the outside but not on the inside.
At least I'm not using religion to virtue signal. You're part of this growing movement of Christians who's saying they're irreligious, but then spout out these beliefs that bring out the underlying fundamentalism.
I'm still going to do drugs and be an anarchist, that ain't the problem. The problem is I'm violent and malicious. And before you start rambling on and on about demons and shit, shut the fuck up. I have no time for supernatural bullshit.
If God's there for me, sounds like you're perfectly willing to throw people away once they're either "Christian enough, so they're independent!" and then ignore them, or throw them away for not being Christian enough.
Your beliefs are what got me hurt in the last year to begin with. Fuck organized religion and fuck you for pretending to be all friendly and coaxing me into this shit.
You probably look down on people for being atheists by the sounds of things.
What you want is blind acceptance of your error filled ways and beliefs. Well you won't get it here. I'm not going to tell you that you're fine, because you're not. Do you know what true, pure anarchy is? Have you followed it through to the end? It's you, dead. For no reason. Pointless. Because someone wanted something you had or didn't like you or whatever reason. Anarchy is hell. Nobody lives through true anarchy.
God is Love but there are conditions or there would be no need for Jesus. Everyone could do anything they wanted without fear of any repercussions. Children raped and murdered. People suffering... This is anarchy, the thing you claim to want.
My beliefs don't hurt you. If your happiness depends on what I believe you'll live and die in misery, which it sounds like you are. I don't care what other people believe about me. I care what God believes about me because I'm going to face Him one day, not you.
I apologize. I'm oversensitive, and honestly I'm just apolitical. I have my beliefs but go with the flow because there is nothing else.
I hope you have a better day. I just can't handle life anymore. I can't escape, just numb things.