so a month after the last thing my wife got pregnant again and we proceeded guarded and nervous well we mad it and October 23, 2018 our baby boy was born! he is now just over 7 months old and growing so well.

Sadly in the interim I lost my decent paying job and now work for less than I used to. I am driving all over the state of AZ and sometimes into California and New Mexico, i am tired all the time with no set schedule and i keep getting testy at home because of it. that makes me upset with myself and then frustrated and sad I am paying my bills but just barely and have to rely on far more "Help" than I want to i don't get to be home with my son when he is alert as much as I would like and that bothers me too.

All that and over the last few years have started to question my sexuality, A great friend calls what I describe as "hetero-flexible" I am not sure I want to label things even though it helps others understand where I am in life. I Unconditionally love my wife and regardless of where my questions lead I still see myself with her as long as I live but yet I am now drawn to homoerotic material and wonder what it would be like to have sex with another person possessing male genitalia (Is that the best way to put it since I am not ruling out Trans people either). IF I were to find someone to experiment with my wife would have to approve of them and they under no circumstances would be allowed to try to "replace" my family. and yes we have tried Pegging and it was a lot of fun but it didn't satiate the want to do this.


so here I am 32 years old with a wife and son i would never give up and having a sexual identity crisis. I feel like i am adrift in a strong current but have no idea where I am headed. and very little control over where I am going next, and I am apprehensive of whats around the river bend.