Indeed, a most fascinating question young Lady.

And one I shall return to later. Life carries me away, though your honest and erotic question begs me to answer. I shall heed that request soon, I promise. But for now, though I am deeply in the mood for such a discussion, I am dragged away as a sailor by time and tide...

But I shall return.

...I mean I've never had sex, chances are I won't, but I'd imagine that both would be pretty nice. To be honest, being dominated by someone (as long as it's not too much - not at all into the whole pet/BDSM/rape-play stuff when it comes to real life) sounds a lot nicer, though.

There's quite a lot of BDSM that doesn't include those things, sugar.

Oh yeah, no, I know - I just meant that pet- and noncon-play are things I also don't like. Sorry it came across like that, I'm aware they're not all the same thing!

Though there's probably some parts of BDSM that I'd enjoy in real life that I just don't know about, all the BDSM things that I can think of right now...probably wouldn't really be for me? If that makes sense? I hope it does.

Certainly! But it's good to keep in mind that what makes it into porn is everything that a subculture has to offer.

I'm guessing you meant "isn't everything" and a word got lost? At least there's certainly a lot of subculture stuff that I've heard about and never seen in porn.

But yeah, in that case, agreed!

Ahahah yes! Absolutely that. This is what happens when I try to type before coffee!

Ha, that's understandable! Lot's of people pretty much can't function without that in the morning.

I always fantasize about submissive scenarios, but in real life when having vanilla sex I take charge most of the time.
Outside vanilla sex, which is awesome, I’m very submissive. Me and my wife haven’t played with bdsm in long time actually. She isn’t naturally dominant mut liked to play the dom nevertheless, but didn’t get that much of a kick out of it as I did. She is not submissive either. But I def want to let someone else have the power over me, not anything rough though, I need gentle and loving handling.

If gentle and loving control is what you need, there's a whole world of that out there for you.

A discussion I had last night with a sub that I have accepted for training. It is a bit long, but there are real clues here to the nature of service, the role of a slave and the ability of a Master or Mistress. Granted, I say so myself...

But I am a natural dominant and a caring Master. I was thinking to write something especially for this request, but my discussion with "Young Christopher" seems the perfect thing, I hope you find it of value.

To set the scene, I asked Christopher to prove his trust by sending me a photo. He did well to clarify what type of photo- a Master or Mistress is never offended by a slave's genuine request for clarity and guidance and he was rewarded with praise for asking. (Christopher is brand new to such things, other than playing online- a terrible school to learn from.) I asked for a simple "street clothes" photo taken recently. Christopher decided to take one of how he was dressed now, and I left this to his prerogative as opposed to a prepared shot.

He then asked if he could finish watching his video on a new game that's coming out- "Only eight minutes."

I left him to watch his video and typed the following to him at my convenience later in the day when I had spare time.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

You should always assume an imperative when asked for something that you can reasonably do or give. "Cook me dinner" implies a time frame. "Take a picture does not, especially if you are simply involved in something you would rather do than obey a command. It's one thing to be stuck in public and unable to reply, but another to be stuck in a video game or some other thing that can be set aside for your Master's or Mistresses wish.

Given my busy life, I can't always await for you to finish what you are doing. If there is a real need, that's one thing- IE, eating with your family. But if you truly wish to be... accepted as a servant to a Master or Mistress, there is no better way to prove it than to drop whatever you are doing and answer their call. The more important of a thing you drop to provide service, the more impressive the sacrifice is. Consider this your second lesson, young Christopher. Drop whatever you are doing, if possible, for the call of your Master or Mistress.

A true Master or Mistress will test you, young Christopher. Will you miss that movie that you really wanted to see for them? Will you miss dinner with a friend or family for them? This is how a servant is evaluated for service. It is one thing to engage in sex at a Master or Mistresses call. It is quite another to obey a mundane command when it's inconvenient.

You need to understand young man, your service in the small things is where you prove your worth and value.

A servant that is trustworthy of a small command, like a simple photo of themselves as they look now, not even a nude, is trustworthy of much bigger things.

And if you obey quickly and with real desire to please, there is an erotic release in your Master or Mistress. This is something that you can use to pleasure them, young Christopher. Obeying, even in the small things, causes a physical release in your Master, young man. It's something to do with power and its seduction sweetie. Showing you place a high value upon your Master's call and request, so much so that you consider it a command, causes a release of what I fondly refer to as "erotic potions" in a dominant.

Being obeyed young man, with vigor and intent, is deeply pleasing to a dominant. I am a true Master, young Christopher. My mind deeply grasps what it is to own another's will, how good it feels to know they will not only obey, but obey with cheer and vigor. When my commands are accepted as such and intently complied with, my mind causes a physical change in my body. It feels good to own another, my young man. You have no idea. But if you want to be another's slave, even part time, you must learn to comply with all your heart, mind and soul.

Then you will cause in me the release of deep pleasures Christopher.

The same is true of any other real Master or Mistress. We seek to be valued by our slaves. And if you expect to be really, truly owned by a good Master or Mistress, you MUST learn that treating all requests as commands is important to you. So important that you do them now if at all possible- that should be paramount.

I hope I have made myself clear, young Christopher.

Understand, I am not angry with you.

You did however, not pass your second test.

Consider carefully my friend, do you really want to be owned?

Ownership is 24\7, young man. Your will is directed only to your Master or Mistress and what they want. Your needs will be provided for, but service to your Master or Mistress is THE most important thing in your life, dear Christopher.

Certainly more important than a game video.

I do expect such errors from a sub exploring what they think are their desires for service.

And I am not angry.

But a Master or Mistress that does not enjoy training subs into slaves... well you would never have heard from them again my friend.

This is topping from the bottom my friend, an all too common occurrence in subs that think they want to serve as slaves, but really only want the erotic pleasures involved.

Are you here for the sexual delights a good Master or Mistress can provide you? Or are you here to serve the needs of your Better?

Am I your Better Christopher? Does what I wish matter more to you than a video that may be paused?

Apparently not my young man. I say that not to hurt you, nor to elicit an apology from you. I don't need one.

But that tiny thing would doom you with a Master or Mistress looking for a true servant.

And that's not what you want sweetie, is it?

I hope not. If so, you are just another sub looking to see themselves pleased...

I should explain just what happens physically to a Master or Mistress when they see an eager slave. It’s important you understand and relish your roles and ability as a slave Christopher.

It's most important that you know this, young man, so that you can see how important your service can be, see how much pleasure you can provide to your Master or Mistress with real and eager obedience.

When I see a sub, a real sub, someone that puts my slightest wish above all but their existence... there is a deep physical, mental, even spiritual reaction.

My body responds with a narcotic like injection of the potions of lust, love, bliss- and erotic desires. Suddenly, my chest heaves, and gentle puffs of air come from my nostrils as my lungs abruptly crash against my chest- forced by my body’s injection of lust.....

If your service and obedience continues to please, my abdomen will contract with wild abandon. I may even shake, my dear young Christopher. It all depends upon my servant's obedience. It is something you need to understand. YOU cause a beautiful, and addictive, reaction in your Master or Mistress when you obey their slightest whim with vigor and alacrity.

If pursued, my stomach will fill with butterflies... And soon a beautiful, narcotic like high -better than any opiate- settles upon me... My tailhole with glow with desires and a pleasurable, deep ache resides there- provided my servant truly wishes to please.

My manhood, or Stallionhood depending upon whom I play with, will weep liquid joy... Joy I can feel pass betwixt his lips when I pulse... It is an exquisite feeling being truly served by another, young man. And it can continue as long as my slave obeys.

Do you wish to be that slave Christopher?

Do you wish your Master or Mistress to have a deep and physical reaction to you young man?

Then you must obey quickly, cleanly, fully and with the greatest happiness- even if you don't want too. What you want is of little value to most Master's or Mistresses young man. Can you obey? That is the question they ask.

It's not easy, is it Christopher?

A real Master or Mistress will test you, find what you value, and then demand that you put that thing of value down and sacrifice your own desires for them.

You seek to be slave? To be owned in a 24/7 relationship?

Be of value to a Master or Mistress- and you will be shocked how fast you may find such a relationship young Christopher.

It's not easy young man.

Are you really sure you want to?

Think upon that. It's an important question. And understand that this is not about sex. A good Master or Mistress is always in demand. I can have sex, especially online, with dozens and dozens- all more experienced and polished than you. I don't need another play partner, young man. I want a servant that obeys and is genuinely concerned that my commands are of greatest value to them. I have taken so very long, writing pages of text to you, because you claim to want to be a slave.

I wish to help you become what you wish to be.

Don't take my words too harshly, young Christopher.

Now in the future, you should only ask for release for something important. For instance, dinner with family is important. But you should ASK to be released, not assume. And it is my prerogative to say no, young man.

Well, now you understand the value of quick and full obedience.

I own a Springer dog. She serves because praise makes her feel so good. Do you value my praise more than her?

We shall see....

Please tell me that you obtained Christopher's consent for sharing this conversation!

Of course. And that's not his real name, regardless. I don't give out personal info, he can't be identified.

Phew! Identification or not, I'd hate for something this intimate to be shared without the permission of all.

Why thank you.

Yes, intimacy is such a delicious dish... It has become to me like food. I cannot live without it for long.

But unlike food, one does not fatten or become ill from indulgence in intimacy. Indeed, if more people were intimate, unafraid to share themselves like this, the world would be a far better place.

Intimacy, in all its forms, is deeply healing, deeply calming and provides a confidence like no other. Love truly is a healing drug and intimacy one of its most potent forms...

I have wondered why we avoid it so...

It is because we fear rejection. Yes, to be rejected, what a terrible power it holds over us. Especially if someone is mean or cruel with it. An entire life can be destroyed by just a few words...

But once one gets enough intimacy, their whole life changes. Refusals don't hurt anymore. And indeed, one becomes gentle with others, one values them and their feelings. Intimacy is a wise teacher, a gentle and beautiful Mistress that changes humans from a mass of confused and angry intentions, to creatures of pleasure and joy. It is part of the joy we humans feel from love, in all of its forms. But it is especially potent too. There is nothing like feeling the intimacy of a lover that really, truly cares for your body, your mind and your soul.

And there is nothing quite like the intimate bond betwixt the masculine and feminine, however it may be shared.

Yes, there is great beauty there.

And the young slave in my story above is most feminine...

It matters not what his driver's license might say. His body and his demeanor are that of a shy girl, most demur, most bashful, but most willing to experience intimacy. So much so that in my presence, he is a girl...

You mentioned the idea of power.

Intimacy is indeed a power. A power not to be abused.

With it, even a young slave may feel exactly as a young woman does, when taken in intimacy by her male. Or as a Mare does, when taken in intimacy by her Stallion. Or as a woman does, in a loving, deep, blissful bond with a lover.

I do hope you and your viewers enjoyed my understanding of intimacy. While I am an older male, I feel that age has granted me insights into the nature of love. Intimate love, erotic love, lust filled love. Insights that allow me to help heal with intimacy, those that have been hurt and rejected by the hurt and rejected.

And intimacy is indeed a drug... A healing drug. A magic potion that transforms a woman into a thing of bliss... A potion that allows a male to truly bond with her soul and mix it with his. Yes, this is intimacy, delicious, healing, blissful.

So sad we withhold it from each other...

I have leanings and fantasies that go both ways. I love to dream up scenarios for long-term power exchange. For a great many of them, I’d love to be the sub, while for some I think it would also be great fun to be the dom(me). I realize that kind of play and/or lifestyle requires a great deal of trust in one’s partner(s) on both sides. I find it a great turn-on to contemplate the possibilities.

I’m not sure I’ve said anything here you haven’t already figured out from working with me on commissions. :)