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Isolation
6 years ago
So as some. not many, but some would know, I moved out recently. one month ago in fact. It's bee a long ride to where I am today, and I haven't been able to make much of a journal about it as I wish I could, thanks to my unsettling state of mind. I think I'm in a stable place right now though, that where what I can say can be true for a while, and that for me is that, personal space is kinda different now.
I have it, but it's just not the same. This is my first time moving out and well, maybe that may be why I'm feeling such a way that I am. It's not that I don't have personal space anymore, but it just doesn't feel like this space is mine and that fact hasn't changed ever since I moved in. it feels weird to be in "my room". its like a decorated guest room that coincidentally has all of the same things that i do in it.
Sometimes I don't even want to enter it, acknowledge it, or anything.
I hope things change.
I have it, but it's just not the same. This is my first time moving out and well, maybe that may be why I'm feeling such a way that I am. It's not that I don't have personal space anymore, but it just doesn't feel like this space is mine and that fact hasn't changed ever since I moved in. it feels weird to be in "my room". its like a decorated guest room that coincidentally has all of the same things that i do in it.
Sometimes I don't even want to enter it, acknowledge it, or anything.
I hope things change.
Take it from a guy who lives alone, in an apartment unit made for more than one person. Even if one room is decorated, the rest of the house is just too empty to feel like I belong here.
It definitely takes a while to get used to a surrounding, especially when you have to replace the company of friends or family. That's always the hardest thing to replace.