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2019 - Ending the decade with a bang
6 years ago
General
So, yet another year has passed. The decade is pretty much over, so this is my final 201x review...the next one will be for the start of the new 20s.
I admit that I haven't really done much on here for the last year, except for the picture that I just posted a few hours ago. Hopefully I can be more active here again in 2020.
It certainly was an eventful year, somewhat chaotic to be honest. After a quiet January, it really started off in early February. I sat in my Latin exam for the millionth time, and despite having studied my ass off, I felt lost, and didn't seem to understand anything. And basically in the exam room, I made an important decision. A life-changing one. I'm gonna quit uni and look for job training instead. I'd need Latin for a degree at uni, but after failing that shit repeatedly, I lost all motivation to try again.
(Btw, my hate for Latin is so extreme that my new band's name is in Latin...more on that sometime in 2020 though.)
I've also generally found more and more that uni didn't really fit me, and I need a better-structured job. Basically a standard office job.
In late February/early March, found a job training ad for training as a public administration clerk that would start in August 2019. So I applied, and I even got invited to a job interview, but ultimately got rejected. So ever since then, I've been focusing on 2020. I've applied to a bunch of places and have been to several job interviews. Unfortunately no job offer yet, but I'm optimistic that I'll find something.
I also joined a local gym in February. I try to go there somewhat regularly, but really haven't been going enough. I do enjoy it though, and one of my main new years resolutions for 2020 will be actually going to the gym more often, at least twice a week if possible.
And yet another thing I started in Feburary was taking vocal lessons. Since they're quite expensive, I'm only taking one lesson a month, but I've noticed definite improvements. And I've found that I can take a lot of things I've learned during the lessons and build on them even more at home. My range has definitely increased, and I'm finally really getting the hang of my mixed voice, which will help me even more in the higher range.
Also in Feburary, but a bit later that month, Dream Theater (my favourite band) released their album "Distance Over Time". Their best album in years IMO. So when I was listening to the album for the first time, I looked at their tour dates, and when they'd be in Germany. The show closest to where I live would be on 15th June. MY BIRTHDAY. So fast forward to that day, and I got to see my favourite band live on my birthday, it was incredible!!
June was also an important month for me regarding my other big hobby, sim racing. I finally got some better pedals, Fanatec CSL Elite LC (with a load cell brake pedal). Probably the best sim racing investment I've ever made. Plus, I joined a sim racing team, and have been racing with them in an endurance league on Assetto Corsa Competizione, starting in late September.
But back to the topic of music. In early July I had my final guitar exam for uni. I did quite well. I think the fact that I've decided to not go for a degree anymore definitely helped, as I didn't really have any pressure going into the exam.
I even made some money through music this year, by playing at art exhibitions, one in September and one in December. At the one in September, I actually debuted a new song that I had written just a few days before, about being at the Baltic Sea. It was inspired by a holiday with my family on the island of Usedom in August, which was awesome, and very relaxing.
Another musical highlight of the year happened just this past Sunday actually, on the 29th December. Got to see the musical "Tanz der Vampire" (Dance of the Vampires) with my family, and it was amazing. It's the third musical I've seen, and my favourite so far. Kinda makes me wanna try to write a musical myself one day.
For the last few months I've mainly been focused on finding job training for next year. To pass the time, I'm still going to uni, but really just to pass some time, I'm just taking classes that I'm actually interested in, and not taking any exams this semester.
I've also been sim racing quite a lot. My brother and I now own an Oculus Rift S together, though I tend to use it a lot more than he does. And ever since early November, I've pretty much been racing only in VR. I love how immersive it is. It absolutely does feel like I'm in the car, sometimes I even seem to feel things (e.g. movements in the car) that I physically could not have felt...
It definitely was a great year for me as a sim racer. Not only because of the new pedals I bought in June, and joining a team to compete in a league. I've also started to make skins/liveries for some cars in Assetto Corsa. For now, I've only made skins for the Porsche 911 GT3 Cup car (which I've sat in IRL), but I'm planning to make some skins for other cars soon as well.
I've also been looking to get into content creation (YouTube/Twitch), about sim racing. Unfortunately, I didn't set myself a good regular schedule, and only ended up doing two YouTube videos this year. Last night I did my very first live stream on Twitch though, playing Assetto Corsa, and I absolutely loved it. My driving was shit for a lot of it, but I really enjoyed interacting with the viewers (even though I probably just had about 3 or 4 viewers). My plan for 2020 is to do this somewhat regularly, let's say at least twice a month.
One thing that honestly fell short this year is ABDL stuff. I think I only ordered one pack of diapers throughout the whole year. I haven't been padded since early August. And honestly, I really want to get some diapers again, it'll definitely help me relieve some stress. But it would be kinda risky at the moment, in that I don't know if I can find a good moment to pick them up (I usually have them delivered to the post office and then pick them up when I have the time, usually when no one else is home).
Part of the problem is that my sister hasn't been going to work for about 2 1/2 months. She doesn't feel like she could handle it currently, she's definitely unstable. And it's a massive source of stress for all of us. A lot of how she uses her energy is being aggressive. There are temper tantrums in this house, daily. And not by the little husky pup... Though I do admit, I can be somewhat short-tempered too sometimes. I'm just incredibly annoyed.
But at least by now least she's willing to go for multi-week therapy in a psychiatric hospital. It'll hopefully start early next year. The doctor there has suggested that in addition to being autistic (high-functioning), she might also have impulsive-type EUPD. And that definitely seems plausible.
So, as I said, it's been quite an eventful year. I'd say it was a good one though. Definitely an interesting way to end the decade. But most of all, it's been a very important year for me. I've decided to change direction for my future. But by the time I'll know more, it'll already be early 2020.
Here's to a happy new year, and a happy new decade!
I admit that I haven't really done much on here for the last year, except for the picture that I just posted a few hours ago. Hopefully I can be more active here again in 2020.
It certainly was an eventful year, somewhat chaotic to be honest. After a quiet January, it really started off in early February. I sat in my Latin exam for the millionth time, and despite having studied my ass off, I felt lost, and didn't seem to understand anything. And basically in the exam room, I made an important decision. A life-changing one. I'm gonna quit uni and look for job training instead. I'd need Latin for a degree at uni, but after failing that shit repeatedly, I lost all motivation to try again.
(Btw, my hate for Latin is so extreme that my new band's name is in Latin...more on that sometime in 2020 though.)
I've also generally found more and more that uni didn't really fit me, and I need a better-structured job. Basically a standard office job.
In late February/early March, found a job training ad for training as a public administration clerk that would start in August 2019. So I applied, and I even got invited to a job interview, but ultimately got rejected. So ever since then, I've been focusing on 2020. I've applied to a bunch of places and have been to several job interviews. Unfortunately no job offer yet, but I'm optimistic that I'll find something.
I also joined a local gym in February. I try to go there somewhat regularly, but really haven't been going enough. I do enjoy it though, and one of my main new years resolutions for 2020 will be actually going to the gym more often, at least twice a week if possible.
And yet another thing I started in Feburary was taking vocal lessons. Since they're quite expensive, I'm only taking one lesson a month, but I've noticed definite improvements. And I've found that I can take a lot of things I've learned during the lessons and build on them even more at home. My range has definitely increased, and I'm finally really getting the hang of my mixed voice, which will help me even more in the higher range.
Also in Feburary, but a bit later that month, Dream Theater (my favourite band) released their album "Distance Over Time". Their best album in years IMO. So when I was listening to the album for the first time, I looked at their tour dates, and when they'd be in Germany. The show closest to where I live would be on 15th June. MY BIRTHDAY. So fast forward to that day, and I got to see my favourite band live on my birthday, it was incredible!!
June was also an important month for me regarding my other big hobby, sim racing. I finally got some better pedals, Fanatec CSL Elite LC (with a load cell brake pedal). Probably the best sim racing investment I've ever made. Plus, I joined a sim racing team, and have been racing with them in an endurance league on Assetto Corsa Competizione, starting in late September.
But back to the topic of music. In early July I had my final guitar exam for uni. I did quite well. I think the fact that I've decided to not go for a degree anymore definitely helped, as I didn't really have any pressure going into the exam.
I even made some money through music this year, by playing at art exhibitions, one in September and one in December. At the one in September, I actually debuted a new song that I had written just a few days before, about being at the Baltic Sea. It was inspired by a holiday with my family on the island of Usedom in August, which was awesome, and very relaxing.
Another musical highlight of the year happened just this past Sunday actually, on the 29th December. Got to see the musical "Tanz der Vampire" (Dance of the Vampires) with my family, and it was amazing. It's the third musical I've seen, and my favourite so far. Kinda makes me wanna try to write a musical myself one day.
For the last few months I've mainly been focused on finding job training for next year. To pass the time, I'm still going to uni, but really just to pass some time, I'm just taking classes that I'm actually interested in, and not taking any exams this semester.
I've also been sim racing quite a lot. My brother and I now own an Oculus Rift S together, though I tend to use it a lot more than he does. And ever since early November, I've pretty much been racing only in VR. I love how immersive it is. It absolutely does feel like I'm in the car, sometimes I even seem to feel things (e.g. movements in the car) that I physically could not have felt...
It definitely was a great year for me as a sim racer. Not only because of the new pedals I bought in June, and joining a team to compete in a league. I've also started to make skins/liveries for some cars in Assetto Corsa. For now, I've only made skins for the Porsche 911 GT3 Cup car (which I've sat in IRL), but I'm planning to make some skins for other cars soon as well.
I've also been looking to get into content creation (YouTube/Twitch), about sim racing. Unfortunately, I didn't set myself a good regular schedule, and only ended up doing two YouTube videos this year. Last night I did my very first live stream on Twitch though, playing Assetto Corsa, and I absolutely loved it. My driving was shit for a lot of it, but I really enjoyed interacting with the viewers (even though I probably just had about 3 or 4 viewers). My plan for 2020 is to do this somewhat regularly, let's say at least twice a month.
One thing that honestly fell short this year is ABDL stuff. I think I only ordered one pack of diapers throughout the whole year. I haven't been padded since early August. And honestly, I really want to get some diapers again, it'll definitely help me relieve some stress. But it would be kinda risky at the moment, in that I don't know if I can find a good moment to pick them up (I usually have them delivered to the post office and then pick them up when I have the time, usually when no one else is home).
Part of the problem is that my sister hasn't been going to work for about 2 1/2 months. She doesn't feel like she could handle it currently, she's definitely unstable. And it's a massive source of stress for all of us. A lot of how she uses her energy is being aggressive. There are temper tantrums in this house, daily. And not by the little husky pup... Though I do admit, I can be somewhat short-tempered too sometimes. I'm just incredibly annoyed.
But at least by now least she's willing to go for multi-week therapy in a psychiatric hospital. It'll hopefully start early next year. The doctor there has suggested that in addition to being autistic (high-functioning), she might also have impulsive-type EUPD. And that definitely seems plausible.
So, as I said, it's been quite an eventful year. I'd say it was a good one though. Definitely an interesting way to end the decade. But most of all, it's been a very important year for me. I've decided to change direction for my future. But by the time I'll know more, it'll already be early 2020.
Here's to a happy new year, and a happy new decade!
