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My PTSD and life ATM
5 years ago
One of my exs is doing something he threatened to do back in 2013. He is making fake accounts (fetlife) and posting all of my old porn vids I did. Back in 2013, he took my laptop after giving me a concussion and left it somewhere. I don't know where but in 3 days he brought it back. He told me at the time that he had made copies of all of my vids and images. He went on to say that if I ever left him he was going to send them to my job and my parents/children. So I didn't leave. Fast forward to him getting arrested in 2016. I was away from him. I was able to think. I was able to go through every bit of our relationship and see the abuse. The times he had pointed his hunting rifles at me (I do not know if they were loaded or not). The times he threatened to anally rape me if I didn't do something he wanted sexually. When he almost killed me via choking and I went to work hiding bruises on my neck. The times he started to force himself between me and my kids/family. Shutting me off from MOST of my local friends. How he lied for years saying he was terminally ill and dying. His ex wife even reached out to me and helped me by talking about her own experiences.
So, I left him. I left him and started to work on me. I was in the trouple (i had ex's consent to fuck them while he was in jail) and they helped me start to see my own worth. I met my husband a few months later. I wasn't looking for another one on one relationship. Spartacus and I started talking, hanging out. And things blossomed. Everytime I moved though, I brought all of exs stuff with me. I didn't want to be THAT person who just left them and all of their worldly possessions disappeared as well. When ex got out in 2018, he texted me and he came and got his stuff while Spartacus was home. I felt we left at that point on better terms. Cue him not contacting me until about 2/3 weeks ago. He texted me that he was coming to my job to talk and he didn't want to tell me about it via text. Spartacus drove to my job. I met him, Spartacus staying a few feet away to give us space but to be there if I needed him. We talked. He left.
Last wednesday, I was made aware to the fake Fetlife profile he had made. He linked it to my personal facebook account telling people to message me there. I got a slew of friend requests and messages from people I didn't know nor had any friends connected to. These people told me about the account. They gave me screen shots and other information that I needed to take the account down. Friends of mine that are on Fetlife (not outing them) reported the account. The people who contacted me also reported the account on my behalf. Friday, the account was taken down after two days of people sending me dick pics and the like. I thought that was the end.
Today he accessed my old tumblr accounts that I haven't been on since 2014/2015/2016. He posted the vids on my account. I deleted the post. Changed the password and am now in the process of exporting my accounts and deleting them. I have deleted 2 blogs so far. I have about 6 more to go. But as I do this I am shaking. I am crying. My Costochondritis is acting up due to all the mental and emotional instability that I am right now with my PTSD acting up. I was diagnosed with PTSD back in 2013 during the biggest part of the abuse. I do not take that diagnosis lightly. I have had to make my boss of where I work aware of all of this so that I will now be escorted to and from the building to ensure my safety.
So, I left him. I left him and started to work on me. I was in the trouple (i had ex's consent to fuck them while he was in jail) and they helped me start to see my own worth. I met my husband a few months later. I wasn't looking for another one on one relationship. Spartacus and I started talking, hanging out. And things blossomed. Everytime I moved though, I brought all of exs stuff with me. I didn't want to be THAT person who just left them and all of their worldly possessions disappeared as well. When ex got out in 2018, he texted me and he came and got his stuff while Spartacus was home. I felt we left at that point on better terms. Cue him not contacting me until about 2/3 weeks ago. He texted me that he was coming to my job to talk and he didn't want to tell me about it via text. Spartacus drove to my job. I met him, Spartacus staying a few feet away to give us space but to be there if I needed him. We talked. He left.
Last wednesday, I was made aware to the fake Fetlife profile he had made. He linked it to my personal facebook account telling people to message me there. I got a slew of friend requests and messages from people I didn't know nor had any friends connected to. These people told me about the account. They gave me screen shots and other information that I needed to take the account down. Friends of mine that are on Fetlife (not outing them) reported the account. The people who contacted me also reported the account on my behalf. Friday, the account was taken down after two days of people sending me dick pics and the like. I thought that was the end.
Today he accessed my old tumblr accounts that I haven't been on since 2014/2015/2016. He posted the vids on my account. I deleted the post. Changed the password and am now in the process of exporting my accounts and deleting them. I have deleted 2 blogs so far. I have about 6 more to go. But as I do this I am shaking. I am crying. My Costochondritis is acting up due to all the mental and emotional instability that I am right now with my PTSD acting up. I was diagnosed with PTSD back in 2013 during the biggest part of the abuse. I do not take that diagnosis lightly. I have had to make my boss of where I work aware of all of this so that I will now be escorted to and from the building to ensure my safety.
