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Well....here we are
5 years ago
Having a bit of a weird time lately as I'm sure we all are. Without the meets and the regular contacts I've been spending a lot of time on social media, and it's become pretty obvious that in fandom terms I'm very much a consumer. I don't seem to give much back, and not just in artistic ways. I see cons that require help, but having not yet been to a full one I wouldn't have a clue how to help there, it TBH seems arrogant to think I could do anything but get in the way, so I don't offer. And everyone around me seems to create, be it art, music, suits; or have been involved for ages and have these global friendships of real actual furs with shared interests rather than chatting to a group of social media icons and Telegram stickers. Not being able to be close to those I do know for real heightens this feeling of inadequacy too. It lays just how little I contribute bare.
The fandom isn't a competition, I know that, but it really does feel that perhaps I've broken out of my normie ways too late in life to get the full benefit of the fandom, that all of this is now permanently beyond me. I only wanted to be more involved, to have experiences such as late night drunken conversations in room parties, dead dog dances, etc., and most importantly go that little bit further in getting to know people I really want to know better. People who all seem to have shared experiences that I'm not part of.
So yeah, this year was supposed to be the year I joined in. Properly joined in. And for a moment it really did feel there was a momentum. Parties, furmeets in other cities, even two full conventions all booked. Of course as we know it all got swept away, and now we're starting to see conventions in 2021 already being cancelled I worry it'll never happen. Feels like I'm not destined to be part of this after all, or anything else for that matter. Should have been stronger two decades earlier, and now paying the price.
Yeah, I know. Maudlin rubbish like this doesn't help does it. Nobody is exactly cracking open champagne and enjoying life to the full right now. Would have been nice to finally really feel part of something, that's all.
:(
The fandom isn't a competition, I know that, but it really does feel that perhaps I've broken out of my normie ways too late in life to get the full benefit of the fandom, that all of this is now permanently beyond me. I only wanted to be more involved, to have experiences such as late night drunken conversations in room parties, dead dog dances, etc., and most importantly go that little bit further in getting to know people I really want to know better. People who all seem to have shared experiences that I'm not part of.
So yeah, this year was supposed to be the year I joined in. Properly joined in. And for a moment it really did feel there was a momentum. Parties, furmeets in other cities, even two full conventions all booked. Of course as we know it all got swept away, and now we're starting to see conventions in 2021 already being cancelled I worry it'll never happen. Feels like I'm not destined to be part of this after all, or anything else for that matter. Should have been stronger two decades earlier, and now paying the price.
Yeah, I know. Maudlin rubbish like this doesn't help does it. Nobody is exactly cracking open champagne and enjoying life to the full right now. Would have been nice to finally really feel part of something, that's all.
:(
What is it that you really want to see but might not be something that you have found yet? That’s the question you need to create stuff. :) It’s why I started created primate tf content, as bad and cheesy as it might sometimes be. This is really an opportunity to look within yourself and appreciate what makes you you. Popufurs be damned.