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You probably shouldn’t read this random word vomit
5 years ago
It’s literally 3:40 and I don’t have my diary to write in so I’m taking note here. It’s gonna be my teenage babble so feel free to tune out XD
It’s- weird to me. About how much I really care about my character. Damien doesn’t even exist as a real person. He’s completely fake unless you count my fursuit as a real life representation. I love him I really do. He feels like my best friend that I can tell anything to. It’s ironic because he can’t even speak back unless I write the dialogue.
I guess it is pretty narcissistic to feel like someone could be your best friend because you made them based off your favorite qualities from yourself haha. But really that’s just what makes characters so special? You make them to be like you. To be like the you you want to be, and we admire it like it could be real. Damien doesn’t feel fake, nor does my brain acknowledge it, but hey I think that’s okay :3 at least for my age.
At 18 I don’t think I need to know everything, nor do I think I need to be so realistic that I put silly things like talking to my character like they’re a real friend of mine out of my life. It’s okay to be a bit childish... I just wish I would let myself be that way more ahha.
I can get so caught up in the image that everyone else has of me that it can be hard to, not to be myself, but rather to let myself express the- less.. mature side.
I mean I can look at a silly costume I commissioned with literally two years of summer camp job money and feel such joy to where it feels like he is the love of my life. That’s completely silly to someone who might not understand and especially those that can’t figure out why someone would get an expensive costume at 16. I’m okay. I just want to be okay more with these kinds of things before it’s too late. I don’t have a lot of responsibilities right now, and I wish someone could show me how to utilize that more.
-Wolfy Age 18, Oct 24 2020
It’s- weird to me. About how much I really care about my character. Damien doesn’t even exist as a real person. He’s completely fake unless you count my fursuit as a real life representation. I love him I really do. He feels like my best friend that I can tell anything to. It’s ironic because he can’t even speak back unless I write the dialogue.
I guess it is pretty narcissistic to feel like someone could be your best friend because you made them based off your favorite qualities from yourself haha. But really that’s just what makes characters so special? You make them to be like you. To be like the you you want to be, and we admire it like it could be real. Damien doesn’t feel fake, nor does my brain acknowledge it, but hey I think that’s okay :3 at least for my age.
At 18 I don’t think I need to know everything, nor do I think I need to be so realistic that I put silly things like talking to my character like they’re a real friend of mine out of my life. It’s okay to be a bit childish... I just wish I would let myself be that way more ahha.
I can get so caught up in the image that everyone else has of me that it can be hard to, not to be myself, but rather to let myself express the- less.. mature side.
I mean I can look at a silly costume I commissioned with literally two years of summer camp job money and feel such joy to where it feels like he is the love of my life. That’s completely silly to someone who might not understand and especially those that can’t figure out why someone would get an expensive costume at 16. I’m okay. I just want to be okay more with these kinds of things before it’s too late. I don’t have a lot of responsibilities right now, and I wish someone could show me how to utilize that more.
-Wolfy Age 18, Oct 24 2020
Adondis
~adondis
OP
Just noticed this comment, but dude thanks I appreciate it still!
