Okay, so let's start with more important aspect - hiatus. Short message from my status:

"From the 5th of July I'm going into commission hiatus. I'm not sure for how long - I'm planning some changes... maybe even some radical ones, when it goes to style.
There might be a few YCH auctions or adoptables sets in the meantime.
I feel slightly scared, unsure and at the same time excited and ready to work.
That's weird mixture of feelings."

I've thought about it for past few months and came to few conclusions.
- I don't fully enjoy my semi realistic style and comic style. With the first one, I'd like to push even more for more realistic look, especially when it goes to fur and longer hair texture. Drawing single hairs might have interesting result, but it pushes back realism. Same goes with strong lineart-y outline, when it goes for rim lightening. With the comic style - I feel I'm too TLK-ish with my anatomy. I'd like to make it more... mine, more charactestic for specific *artist (* - I don't consider myself an artist, just a hobbyist, which has a long way ahead of herself).
- I'd like to do more traditional paintings. I had a lot of fun working with gouaches, watercolour, acrylic, alcohol and waterbased markers, coloured pencils and more. To be fair, I LOVE experimenting with different medium and have a blast working with them.
However.
Each of them requires time, patience and practise. And a lot of messing up artworks. So far, my mindset pushes me strongly to finish nearly each artwork, and each artwork needs to be perfect. I want to change this mindset - let myself be creative and have fun, not feeling stressend and angry, if something doesn't turn out good.
- Theory. So far, I've read and watched a lot of tutorials, books and videos. However, even when I know what I should do, sometimes I just... loose it along the way while working with the piece. I need to change that.
- General themes of my artworks. So far, I've been focused on feline or charr charracters. Occasionaly, canine or other fantasy creatures. I feel it's high time to get out of comfortable zone.

So, here are my reasons why I think I need to put commissions on stop and get my focus into controlled and regular practicing.
The other aspect is that I'm looking for a regular job. Getting it means a lot of less time to share between practising and work with commissions.

Health update

1. Got first dose of the vaccine on Thursday. Two days of slightly sore arm, nothing more. I'm glad I have it off my head.
2. My scar (yes, the very same thing is my nightmare for over a year already) is acting up again and I feel very anxious about it. Physical side is one thing, but mental side of it costs me a lot too. The nightmares came back, sleepless nights too. I'm just tired of it.

Tomorrow I'll be contacting my Doctor about the scar trouble... I'm not sure what he'll decide to do about it and the hearing implant. Perspective of potentially loosing something I've been waiting for 25 years... it's heart wrenching.