Youtube is a treasure chest when it comes to extraordinary videos. Some stirs up our emotions, other awakens emotions we didn't know we had. Then there's those who just gives us a real brainfuck. And now and then we stumble over those who can't be put in any category.

Here's some examples of what kind of phantasmagoric wonders you can find if you dig deep enough:


Lost in the Cycle:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k40eSsndYeM

BOY - Joey:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NWuYL6Fjn2s

Ultimate Muscle Roller Legend:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nk2wViKSh_M


Youtube is also a goldmine for finding the kind of music that fits your brain patterns. Music in itself is therapy for the soul, but if you at the same time is provided with something visual then it just increases the impact. I'm not talking about the kind of music videos that spams the media today, where the main focus is on bodies and big cars, but those rare ones that really gives you something. Those who stays with you.

Like this one: Morcheeba - Enjoy The Ride:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7uMGH3kHhzM


I could have gone on and filled up this journal with tons of Youtube-links, but that would just have made it look more like spam. It's like when you get a Youtube-link in your e-mail, you click on it. But if there's 28 links, then you most likely just deletes it.

Do you have any favorites or gems you want to share? And why are they so special to you?

As a hardcore fan of the games (1-3 + Origins) I must say I'm quite excited over the new movie that comes out this October.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMWrZmD0AN4

What kind of horrors awaits poor Heather? Is Pyramidhead still an exhibitionist? Have the nurses learnt their lesson about not wielding their scalpels like fly swats in crowded areas (like they did in the first movie)? Will Malcolm McDowell get a memorable role?
There's always the chance that the movie ends up as rubbish, but I still have my high hopes. It is after all Silent Hill. The town that gives it's visitors the greatest mindfuck of all.


Since we're already talking about Silent Hill... Yes, Pyramidhead is a hunk. He creeped the hell out of me in 2001 when I was playing Silent Hill 2 for the first time. But after a couple of playthroughs I started to feel something else than dread when I saw him. And that feeling slowly blossomed to a sexual obsession of some kind. By then it was done. I could never go back and be scared by his bizarre looks and behaviour anymore. No matter how much I tried, all I could think of was how he looked under that coat of his. Was he naked? Or wearing a speedo? Thong? Boxer shorts with red hearts on? Or silk boxer shorts with Pink Panther's face on the back and front? Anyway... What I am grateful for, is that neither the games or the movie have decided to show a Pyramidhead's face. Sometimes we need those mysteries to stay a mystery.



In the end I just want to say something about the games.

Silent Hill: It introduced me to psychological horror while being able to BE the main character. Before it was only movies that could to that, but with those you had to imagine yourself being the one getting tormented and haunted. Now I could finally explore the nightmares on my own. The story and all those references to horror in general sealed my fate as a Silent Hill fan forever.

Silent Hill 2: Where do I start? This took psychological horror to a new level, but it also had some sadness over it. It was not just all about survival anymore. The emotional impact it made on me is indescribable. Then there's Pyramidhead, my favorite nightmarish beast that loves to molest both humans and other monsters.

Silent Hill 3: It was great to continue the story from the first game. Both the horror and mindraping was strong in this one. And it showed that even if you manage to get out of Silent Hill, you are still not all out. Silent Hill will find you wherever you are.

Silent Hill 4: The Room: Rubbish. Sacrilege. The music was good, but the rest sucked. What makes it worse is that it wasn't even a Silent Hill game until it was over halfway done. It started out as something else, but then someone said "hey, let us put some elements from Silent Hill in it and call it Silent Hill 4".

Silent Hill: Origins: A prequel to the first game. Here we get to learn more about the story and the characters from the first one. The game was a bit short, but they managed to keep the eerie and disturbing atmosphere which made Silent Hill so well known in the first place. Oh Lisa Garland, you didn't deserve the treatment and cruelty you got.

Silent Hill: Shattered Memories: Is this actually a Silent Hill game? It was supposed to be a remake, but ended up as a reimagining instead. I have to admit I didn't play through it, it was just too nagging and stressful. I'm still unsure of what to think of it.

Silent Hill: Homecoming: Take away the horror and put some more guns and more action in it, yes that may be a good idea... What they did was removing what Silent Hill is all about and instead made a new *bang* *bang* *boom* game. Tougher and bigger enemies doesn't mean better and scarier. The game just felt as a poor attempt at copying the first ones, just with a more "western" mindset. And it didn't work. Stealing elements from the Silent Hill movie didn't work either.

Silent Hill: Downpour: Mnyees, maybe. They could have made it into something great, but why the need of putting action elements in the latter Silent Hill games? Silent Hill is horror and twisted, tormented enemies. Not zombie like enemies that you have to shoot over and over again. I fear Silent Hill as we know the franchise is beyond repair. If a new Silent Hill game is announced in the future I may just go "meh".


Silent Hill; Heaven for some, Hell for others. :p

Considering the popularity of zombies in media today, it's strange that we haven't seen anything with Tank Girl fighting zombies yet. I like Tank Girl as it is, but still... Seeing Booga in tight leather gear as he wields different melee weapons against a small group of zombies would be pretty awesome. But only if it was done in a gloomy style, and not as a comedy. I really don't know what I'm writing. Time for sleep.

In 1993, when I was 13 years old, I saw something strange on the video game shelf in the toystore at my local mall. It had something to do with Mario, but it wasn't Super Mario World. Instead it was Super Mario Kart. (Remember, this was way before internet, and gaming magazines was almost impossible to get a hold on where I lived.) So I was both confused and tempted by this strange game. As I was looking at the box, one of the employees came over and recommended it to me. "It's so fun that you'll laugh till you cry" he said. I now know that he actually meant "it's so evil that you'll cry and then laugh like a basket case".

But I bought the game. It was a Mario game, right? At home I invited some friends over, and together we ventured down in the hideous spiral of despair and miserableness that only a Mario Kart game can create. It was that early autumn evening in 1993 that I was marked for life. It was when my addiction for Mario Kart started, which have had a rather self-destructive impact on my mind. No matter how much insanity I have to go through, I can't imagine a life without it. I'm not asking for a logic explanation, because there are none.

For 19 years I have been a slave of Mario Kart. Been a slave of the twisted characters, who have made a living of making my life sour as vinegar. During these years I have often hated myself for picking that game down from the video game shelf. But at the same time, I can't imagine a life without it.

Super Mario Kart was the beginning, it took me over to the dark side.
Mario Kart 64 was a delight and was also the start of my obsession over Wario's manically laughter.
Mario Kart: Double Dash was twice the fun and twice the madness, it was also the start of my hate towards any baby characters.
Mario Kart DS was fun, but so tiny. I must play it again soon, but not before my mental health is renewed.
Mario Kart Wii was what finally made me snap. And that's it, now I'm damaged beyond repair. I've been defeated.
Mario Kart 7 was a nice, fresh breeze. But why did they make Toad so evil?
Next Mario Kart game will be what kills me, I'm sure of it.



So, what do I think of the characters?


Toad: I just want to put your big, round, delicate mushroom head between my hands, then SQUISH it to a disgusting porridge, and then EAT it in front of your shivering, cowardly friends. You are so God damn annoying.

Baby Mario/Luigi/Daisy/Peach: You are not cute. You are not adorable. You are not heart melting. You are evil and sick. You all make Damien look like a Christian child full of love. I want to drown you all in a bathtub.

Bowser: You... You.. Hmm, how can I stay mad at you? I can't, but you deserve some real beating for always fucking up my 1st place.

Bowser Jr.: You need therapy. And the yellow colored pills. Lots of them.

Yoshi: If I see your over dimensional nose one more time I'm going to cut it off. Stop sticking it in other people's business.

Koopa Troopa/Paratroopa: I have to admit it, you are cute. And I don't want to see you hurt. But sometimes I just want to boil you alive in oil and masturbate to your agonizing screams.

Toadette: Go back to prostitution, because you have nothing behind a wheel to do. NOTHING!

Birdo: You too, you cross-dressing freak. And with a big mouth like that I'll bet you have sucked plenty of cock to get your driver's license.

Petey Piranha: Your head is like a giant wind sail, blocking my view completely. But you have a charming smile, so I'm not sure what to think of you. One part of me wants to chop you into a salad, while another part wants to drive into the sunset with you in your Piranha Pipes kart.

Rosalina: You're a bitch. The worst of them all. A queen bee that deserves to be mauled by a drunk and mean Bowser. And you don't fool anyone, we all know how much you spend on botulinum toxin each year.

Peach: There's only one thing I want to do with you, and that is to push a flamethrower down your throat and watch you burn to ashes from inside out.

Daisy: How old were you again? So stop acting like a "princess". You're a queen mother, a withering leaf. I hope you crash and burn. AND STOP REPEATING YOUR NAME.

Donkey Kong Jr.: You deserve a banana pie. With cyanide. You may have done it good in porn movies, but racing isn't your strongest quality. Now eat your pie.

Diddy Kong: Come with me kiddo, and I'll give you a free lobotomy. Because you have the worst case of ADHD I've ever seen. Afterwards I'll give you a banana.

Metal Mario: Who's nightmare did you escape from? Your voice sounds like someone drowning E.T. in syrup.

Shy Guy: You weird Satan. Can I borrow your head when I go bowling? Why this mask fetish? WHO ARE YOU??

Dry Bowser: That diet didn't do you anything good. You just got more aggressive. Come home with me and I'll make you a good meal and a dessert afterwards.

Dry Bones: Not only did your flesh burn away, but your brain too. You are useless. USELESS, do you hear?

Honey Queen: You're like a bag full of concentrated irritation and loathing. Right now I can't find the right words to describe how much I want to set you on fire.

Wiggler: Are you a male or female? A hermaphrodite maybe? Your shoe fetish doesn't make you any cuter. And come here so I can pull that flower out of your head, maybe your brain will follow?

Wario: You greedy son of a bitch. And how long have you used those purple latex pants? I'll bet you haven't washed them since the 90's. I hope your body one day get smashed by falling rocks while you dig for treasures.

Waluigi: You must have a small penis since you always have to choose the biggest and fastest bikes. I want to tear your limbs off and feed them to starving cannibals.

King Boo: Oh my what a long and powerful tongue you have. Meet me in the shack after the race. But don't you dare to race again, becasue then I have to kill you. One more time that is. Since you're already a ghost.

Mario: I can't uderstand how your body still hangs together. After all that beating and risky adventures your body should be like the one of a 110 year old. My dream is to see you smash into a wall head first. Then Luigi can cry by your grave.

Luigi: Still living in the shadow of Mario? I know a thing you can do that will give you a place in the spotlight. Just mess with the breaks on Mario's gokart. But do you have the brains to do it? Because for me you sounds totally retarded. If God really exist he will let you drive off a cliff without Lakitu helping you avoiding death.

Funky Kong: You should have stayed on your surf board mister.. Why, do you ask? Well, you will regret the choice when I push you down into the lava. The burning sensation will quickly turn to harsh fire and your eyes will melt. It's a very painful death. And don't count on Lakitu to help you out, because his head just got blown off by a sawn-off shotgun.

Lakitu: Lakitu, you have always been an asshole and you will always be an asshole. I'm actually surprised that even Bowser haven't smashed your fragile body with one of the Hammer Bros. hammers.

Mii: Schizophrenia de luxe... I'm confused. And angry.




The games can be fun, yes. But they're also evil.

So very, very evil.

Busy times, man. But luckily I have some spare time to enjoy getting insane by Mario Kart 7 for Nintendo 3DS.

One neat feature in this game is the opportunity to create your own communities and such.
I haven't seen or heard anything about a FurAffinity Community anywhere. It may be too early since the game has just been released.

So I made a community called FurAffinity. I know there's lots of Mario Kart gamers here, and it would be nice if we could fill it up and have some fun.


FurAffinity Community code:
45-4622-2937-7416


Spread the word and let's race as if it's 1999 again!

The boundaries between dreams and reality are smaller than you think. Sometimes the dreams you've recently had stays with you, inside your head, mocks you and transforms everything you see to a reminder of what you dreamt. It's specially those freaky kind of dreams that clings to your soul like a supernatural tick. Drains you of sanity and replaces it with a neverending confusion.

I don't remember how this night's dream started, but I was floating on an air mattress in a pool in my cellar. A red haired woman jumped in the pool from nowhere and asked for a kiss. I kissed her on the forehead just so she would go away. But right after I kissed her, her forehead opened like a sea anemone and a mass of white spermatozoons flew out towards me. It caught me off guard so I jumped back and fell in the water. Gravity suddenly changed and I could swim deeper down in the pool without a hassle. As I descended deeper I could hear a cracking sound. It was huge crystals growing out of the walls. It got tighter and tighter and I was sure I was going to get crushed to death.
Deep down I saw some light and I hurried to reach it before the crystals killed me. The light source came from a hidden door. I opened it and was suddenly dragged into a small room.

The room was covered in purple drapes and there was another door in the middle, with no walls to connect it. I opened it and on the outside chimerasynx was waiting for me in a glowing hearse. I got in the passanger seat and she drove away in an insane speed. Other cars got rammed off the road and burst into flames. My task was to clean the streets of nude people. She stopped on a bridge where a group of people were standing. I got out of the hearse and started to stab a random guy with a huge bowie knife. He screamed and screamed, and I stabbed him everywhere. The stomach, up the ass, the throat, the eyes, in the end his skin melted. It was like watching cheese melt. chimerasynx tossed him over the bridge and ran away. Then someone yelled at me and I saw it was a security guard. The hearse was full of rabbits and onions, and he blamed me for stealing it all. I wanted to get an explanation from chimerasynx but she was long gone.

Following her trail I ended up in a big phone booth. Just as the security guard was about to grab me the floor opened and I fell down. It was a long, dark tunnel. I tried to balance on a log but it just got warmer and warmer, in the end it started to burn, making my legs all burnt and full of blisters.
Down on the ground I entered another room, which led me into a maze that was full of people partying. It was some sort of portal too. If you opened a book of inventions and touched the image you would get teleported to a train station full of trains that could take you there. I also met a friend of mine trying to text message with his wife, but this huge, towering guy cut his ears off with a scalpel. I took it as a hint to leave, so I touched a picture in a book and ended up on the train station.

There I was told that chimerasynx alrady had left in a floating train. She was heading for one of Nikola Tesla's secret inventions. On the train station the floating spermatozoons had also managed to catch up with me. The moles on my body was actually ovums, and all the tiny spermatozoons burrowed themselves into my moles, fertilising them. It freaked me out. Getting this alien lifeform penetrating and changing my body from within made me cringe.
A conductor saw this and told me I could just press the "eggs" out when they got big enough. So when the moles got more sphere like I pressed on the skin around them. Some blood poured out around the now transparent moles and with a "pop" this round, frog egg like thing fell out from my skin. I did this on every mole on my body, pressing out every single fertilized one. I was so busy to remove this horror that I didn't even wonder what kind of specie or creature that would have evolved out from my body. In the end my body was full of small, crater like holes. Small streams of coagulated blood made my entire body look like a part of a circus tent.

After removing the invasion from my body I woke up. But this is not the first time I dream that things grow in my body. One time I dreamt that I removed the skin and flesh on my right arm. And out from the bone in the arm molars was growing. The bone looked like a long, giant jaw. I pulled eveyr single molar, and instead of blood a black goo like substance poured out of the holes in the bone.
What is this thing about getting the body invaded? Changed? Things growing on or inside it? It surely freaks me out and the fear stays with me for days afterwards. If I see the seeds in a water melon I get goosebumps, thinking of seed growing inside of my body.

Dreams have a big impact on life, and it's not always it's the good kind of impact. Sometimes it just fills you with this special kind of fear that won't go away.

Someone have been drinking too much coffee.


Now that the summer is closing in it means that there soon will be small critters everywhere. Most of them so small that you won't notice them until you stop up and really examine the surroundings. Nature is full of fascinating wonders, and I can highly recommend you to take a break now and then and explore the everyday life (and death) of our friends the arachnids and insects.













Spiders would have been the perfect rapists if they were anthropomorphic. All sneaky and clingy, capturing their desirable subjects in their web of lies and using them as if they weren't worth a dime. Flies would probably have been the demented bimbos that you wouldn't have any problems to trick into drinking bleach.

Stolen by  Jonah (together with his couch and microwave)

Been a while since I did a meme. They are fun and also makes you go deeper inside yourself without a scalpel. Here we go:


1. Can you cook?
I went four years to culinary school so I guess the answer is yes. But it haven't made me less clumsy. :(

2. What was your dream growing up?
To be a structural engineer or dentist.

3. What talent do you wish you had?
To master the art of writing.

4. Favorite place?
My own mind.

5. Favorite vegetable?
Cauliflower <3

6. What was the last book you read?
The Destroyer: Terror Squad

7. What zodiac sign are you?
Libra

8. Any Tattoos and/or Piercings?
No tattoos or piercings, and I will never get some either. My body is a temple, it will never be covered with paint or strange bumps. But you're all welcome to enter it.

9. Worst Habit?
It used to be biting my fingernails. Now that I have gotten rid of that habit I have to say laziness.

10. Do we know each other outside of blogging?
Who are you? Are you following me? Have you been sent here to destroy me?

11. What is your favorite sport?
Favorite sport? Pffff.... I'm not interesting in sport. Except bed gymnastics. :p

12. Negative or Optimistic attitude?
Optimistic with a hint of pessimism.

13. What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator with me?
Drive you insane with my nagging and then eat your brain.

14. Worst thing to ever happen to you?
Hmmm... The thing that left me the deepest emotional scar was when some big bullies held me down in a big anthill when I was 5 years old and I could feel them crawl all over me, up my nose, into my ear, down my sweater and jeans, biting, squirting formic acid, making my entire body itch and tremble in pain. The cherry on top was the laughter of the bullies.

15. Tell me one weird fact about you:
The times I tried LSD I didn't feel anything while everyone else were tripping their socks off.

16. Do you have any pets?
No one at the moment but I will probably get some in the future. Maybe you?

17. Do you know how to do the macarena?
The day I do please shoot me.

18. What time is it where you are now?
8 pm

19. Do you think clowns are cute or scary?
They scared the shit out of me before, but now I think they look like transvestite ghosts with mental issues. So no, not scary, rather disturbing.

20. If you could change one thing about how you look, what would it be?
Prettier ears.

21. Would you be my crime partner or my conscience?
Your conscience! Then I could give you one serious mindfuck and manipulated you like a puppet.

22. What color eyes do you have?
Golden brown.

23. Ever been arrested?
Yep! :)

24. Favorite fictional character of all time?
That's a hard one. Let me see.... Bowser!

25. If you won $10,000 dollars today, what would you do with it?
Buy a new couch, delicious meat, a trip to Anthrocon and put the rest into savings.

26. If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
The ability to travel through dimensions.

27. What’s your favorite hangout?
Coffeebar or over at a friend's place.

28. Do you believe in ghosts?
I believe there may be some echoes of the things that have been. Energy and the mind is a strange thing that we know very little of.

29. Favorite thing to do in your spare time?
Watching movies/playing videogames, hanging out with friends, get shocked by the insanity that flows on FurAffinity, cooking, bowling, hiking, swimming and collecting comics.

30. Do you swear a lot?
Too much, but I can live with it. Can you?

31. Biggest pet peeve?
People who stare. I mean, really stare. As if they are mannequins or frozen in time. Not only is it rude and impolite, but also extremly annoying.

32. In one word, how would you describe yourself?
Kind

33. Will you repost this so I can fill it out and do the same for you?
Huh?

I'm still a bit freaked out. Is this the final stage of the dream or have I finally woken up?

Earlier today I laid myself down to rest a bit, but it suddenly went from a 30 minute nap to 8 hours of raw sleep. We're talking real deep r.e.m. here. And what followed was a dream so sinister and freaky that I wonder if I've blown a fuse in my brain.
The madness started when I applied for a job at a sugar company that was frozen in time. It was still 1997 there and my responsibility should be to oversee that the fork lift drivers stacked gigantic sugar cubes the right way. The job interview went on for hours, I had to tell the interviewer everything about myself. Slowly I realised that the woman interviewing me was Mrs. Carmody from the movie The Mist (the insane, religious manipulating chick). The building was surrounded by the same mist and the horrors within it tried to break their way in to us. One of the monsters were this skinless deer like thing the size of an elephant with 8 legs. It's antlers were formed in a strange pattern, almost as they were designed by an eccentric architect.

Suddenly the floor gave in and we all fell down in the basement. I momentarily started to build an igloo of the sugar cubes to protect myself, but it was quickly teared down by an aggressive worm. Just when I thought it would attack me a face grew out of it's middle. I recognized the face, it belonged to a classmate of me who comitted suicide many years ago. He stared at me without saying anything and suddenly his large eyes melted, forming a pool on the floor. He said something like "see yourself to wake up". I then looked at the pool and saw my reflection. It wasn't my face, it was all white and made of porcelain. This made me wake up in my bed.

But I wasn't awake. I was still dreaming. As I sat in the bed I thought of the horrible dream about the sugar warehouse and decided to take a vacation and visit a friend in Singapore. In Singapore I wanted to see the old temples in Thailand, so I took a smaller airplane to Thailand. On the plane I met lincard1000 and his partner, but somehow they didn't know who I was. Half of the trip took place on a road until the plane drove off a cliff. The pilot was deranged, he flew too close to the mountains and too low. Many times I feard that he would crash into temples or forests.
After the plane landed some of the passengers went to their hotel but I and some other passengers wanted to visit the oldest temple on top of a hill. Even if it was in Thailand it was snowing. But we were stubborn and wanted to go up the long hill.

Lincard and his partner went into a side alley and over to a wall with a door. It was just an ordinary, white wooden wall, nothing particular. Why it was there I don't know. But suddenly the door opened and an old woman came out, inviting them in. But they didn't end up on the other side of the wall. Somehow the door was like a portal of some sort.
After a while I gave up walking up that long hill. I was tired and grumpy and wanted to get a warm bath, but the hotel was miles away and I had no money for transport. So I too went over to the wall and knocked on the door. Out came this elderly woman with a mix of blonde and grey hair. The only thing I had to offer her was a handful of peas. She asked if I wanted to get my palm read by her, knowing my future. I gladly accepted and was invited in.
In the living room there was this old man with white hair (probably her husband) and a boy and girl in their early teens (their grandchildren?). She asked if I wanted some tea, because tea often loosen up the soul which makes it easier to read persons.

The tea I got tasted like sweet apricot. The television in the background showed classic music videos and the atmosphere were pretty cozy. The woman continued to pour tea in my mug. I slowly started to notice that she somehow became younger. The white haired man just smiled to her and the two teenagers just chuckled.
I got this really bad feeling that something was terrible wrong. The whole sceneario seemed wrong somehow. And where was Lincard and his partner? And why was the house just a wall on the outside? I should never have entered in the first place and I was getting more and more sleepy. Just when I was about to fall asleep (the moment where you enter deep r.e.m.) I jumped in the chair as if I had gotten electricity through me. I guess it was my subconsciousness pushing me back to awareness. My first thought was to escape, but that never ends good in movies. So I said I had to visit the bathroom. The others just continued to chuckle. I quickly went out in the hallway and grabbed my shoes and jacket and just ran out in the night. From behind I could hear the woman shout my name, her voice almost begging me to come back. It sounded like she was in pain. I didn't turn back, I just continued to run away. The snow was gone and it was raning now.

Suddenly I was back in the old street where I grew up. I looked at my cellphone and saw that I had a bunch of unanswered calls. The one who had been calling me the most had the name Silverlady or Silverwoman. It was the woman that had given me the tea. Her phone number didn't make sense at all, it was as if she had called from all the phones in the world at the same time. I deleted everything on my phone in hope to get rid of her influence. I then called my mother and said I was home but couldn't remember how. She sounded worried and happy at the same time. I asked how long I had been gone and she said 6 years. While I talked to her I saw a burning tower in the horizon, and every time I spoke the flames went higher, even blocking out the sun. But I had other things on my mind than checking out the tower.

I still had the house key to her house and I locked myself in. I found her in the kitchen. She had a different hair color and style, and the kitchen was redecorated. She hugged me and said she never had given up hope, then she got angry and asked where the hell I had been. But I had the same clothes I traveled with and hadn't aged a day. Even my facial hair had exactly the same length I had six years ago.
Even if I was happy something seemed quite wrong, the feeling was very similar to the one I had in the woman's strange house. I then woke up coughing in my bed. I turned around to see if I could find something to remove the slime with and discovered that Pumpkinhead (from the movies with the same name) was laying next to me. He just looked at me with angry eyes, as if I had woken him up from a pleasant dream. I then wake up in my bed again, this time fully awake I hope.


To not know if you are still dreaming or not can be quite tiring on the psyche. Specially if you descend deep into delirium and every attempt at escaping is met by an even more bizarre terror. I really need to learn lucid dreaming, to control my dreams before they end up controlling me like a marionette doll. And who knows what will happen if they still control me after I've woke up?

I need some reality fodder.

I stumbled over this page by accident:
http://www.dinomonsters.com/

The art there is pretty impressive and some of the dinos are rather attractive. A few minutes ago I didn't know about this site, now think about all of the similar sites out there that haven't been found yet. Or is this just old news?
Anyway, while looking at the art I started thinking about the different kind of dinosaurs there have been. Some were cool while others looked like something a drunk, mad scientist would make in a moment of sheer madness.

Do you have any favorite dinosaurs? What was yours while growing up?
I wasn't a fan of dinosaurs when I was young, it's not until the later years I've started to show an interest in them (thank you FA, your perversion knows no boundaries) and there are some types that I really like. The Triceratops, Stegosaurus, Argentinosaurus, Spinosaurus, Parasaurolophus and the Kronosaurus are high on my list over my favorites. There's also some others but I have no idea what their name is.
And a bonus, since it's not directly a dino: The Titanboa, the larges snake ever slithered on the surface of the earth. While todays snakes suffocates birds and rabbits this snake suffocated dinosaurs. Now if that isn't badass then I don't know what is.

Aaaaand another thing that's pretty cool but doesn't end up in the category together with the dinosaurs: The Jaekelopterus Rhenaniae, aka Giant Sea Scorpion - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaekel.....erus_rhenaniae
I'm sure this bugger would ruin many peoples vacation. It looks like a thing that would hurt getting in a fight with. Like here: Elephant vs. Jaekelopterus Rhenaniae

Earth have indeed seen many bizarre life organisms, but I'm sure we are the most sinister one. :D

I just saw the trailer of Green Lantern and I was left with this very familiar and irritating feeling. Familiar because I swear I've seen the 'recipe' of this movie in a ton of other superher movies. Irritated because it will mostly be identical to all the other crap Hollywood vomits out. They are like the opposite of King Midas; everything they touch turns to shit. (I'm talking about superhero movies based off the classic, old, magically comics that really had a plot and a story that it didn't need big boobies to keep the reader interested.)

Let's see... Hal Jordan (played by Ryan Reynolds) is this irresponsible hotshot who loves being single, he have no worries in life, everything is like a game for him. He's a bit cocky and arrogant, can't take anything serious. All the women wants him and he rarely goes to bed alone. But the only woman he really wants do not want him. She's a mature woman with a sad past which made her grow up quicker, and in doing so she missed most of the fun other people get when growing up. He does his best to impress her with stupid and sometimes direct dangerous actions, retarted oneliners and his pretty strong physique.

Suddenly something happens that changes his life. He is given something very important. But he still acts cocky and carefree, he doesn't take his powers serious and use them to show off instead of really doing something good. As the movie goes on he slowly starts to change, but it's not until someone who's very close to him that gets in danger that he becomes the hero everyone need.
In the end he takes responsibility and wins the heart/interest of the only woman he wants. He gets more serious, more mature, because he suddenly discovers that having powers isn't a game. But it doesn't prevent him for still coming with stupid oneliners. And his attitude is still non delicate for the ones over 20.

Add some models in bikinis and some cool parties, maybe a child who is the daughter/son of the director/producer who get a few seconds of screen time, and some few awkward moments that's just there for the laughs. And voilà: The Green Lantern. A movie that could have been great but got turned into fertilizer by the soulless writers. Because it's more important to let the movies be as low rated as possible so they can attract more audience than really making something that is pretty good that makes you go "whoa".

Why do I have the feeling that I've seen this plot before? And why does it make me want to moon Hollywood?
Now before you all burn me alive I have this to say: I may be wrong. I can be dead wrong. The Green Lantern may be a pretty good movie, judging a movie because of it's trailer is the same of judging a book because of it's cover. But from what I saw in the trailer I saw the same things I've seen in the trailers of all the other superhero movies. Heck, even ordinary movies often use this recipe.

I will see the movie, because I was a big fan of the comic when I was growing up. But I won't have any high expectations. If it turns out I have right then ok, you don't have to be a psychic to see the outcome. And if I'm wrong then you can abuse me as much as you want with anything you want.

It just seems like Hollywood have really given up great storytelling. They have given up everything, and instead rely on famous and known brands (comics, videogames, older movies, tv-shows, etc.) that they know will attract people. In that way they don't have to use their own brains.
There's always exceptions though. No rule without exceptions. But the exceptions have been lesser and lesser up through the years.
I wonder what went wrong, and when. Hollywood is becoming a cemetery. I guess that's what happens when everyone focuses on only making movies for kids, no matter what the subject is. Oh, I miss the old days.

As you grow, evolve, getting more mature, old fright slowly looses it's grip on you. Childhood horrors fade away like morning mist. Suddenly you never feel the fear crawl up on you when you have to go down in the basement. Or down a dark, abandoned street next by a creepy forest. You're an adult now, silly things like fear for the unknown or the terror of something ordinary like dolls or clowns belongs to children. Or... do they?

Fear is a primitive driving force that lies deep within us all. It will always be with us, no matter how much we evolve. It is what helps us survive when our delicate and developed mind freeze because it faces a situation it can't calculate or charm itself out of. It triggers our survival instinct to either flee or fight, transforming us to the same primitive being we were 100.000 years ago.

How was your childhood terrors? What were you afraid of? Are you still afraid of the same? How did you get rid of the fear? Do you consider yourself a person with no phobias at all?
What scared the shit out of you when you were young? And what scares you today? Can you see a link between your childhood terrors and phobias and the ones you have today. (That is if you have anyone.)

As a child I was horrified over porcelain dolls. I couldn't be alone in the same room as one. I still find them creepy but I don't care that they're in the same room as me. Clowns was another thing that gave me nightmares. Then you have the ordinary "big hands grabbing at you from underneath the bed" and "disfigured hands reaching for your feet when you walk in stairs".
The worst phobia was ants, but that was because some older kids threw me in a giant anthill and held me down. The feeling of the angry ants crawling all over me and under my clothes was more than pure terror. It was an agonizing fear.

But my strangest fear must be bald men. I was terrified of grown men with bald heads. I thought they all were evil and wanted to kill me. For me, evil was a bald man.

I haven't been so very mobile the last 7 months because of my knee injury. I've mostly been home watching movies, playing videogames and being angry at the world. Now and then I've had friends over, but most of the time I've just been sitting here like a vegetable.
We all love movies and I will here list some movies you should check out if you are a horror and/or science fiction fan.


The Shining
John Carpenter's The Thing
Prince of Darkness
In the Mouth of Madness
Halloween (Carpenter's movies, both the first and second)
Christine
Nightbreed
Hellraiser
A Nightmare on Elm Street
Friday the 13th
Maniac Cop
Slumber Party Massacre
C.H.U.D.
Re-Animator triology
Creepshow
Creepshow II (only segment worth checking out is 'The Raft')
The Blob (The remake from 1988)
Dagon
From Beyond (inspired by Lovecraft)
The Resurrected (Lovecraft inspired here too)
Necronomicon
Pumpkinhead
Incubus
The Beast Within
Something Wicked This Way Comes
Midnight Meat Train
Braindead (AKA Dead Alive)
Bad Taste
28 Days Later
28 Weeks Later
Evil Dead 1 & 2
Army of Darkness
Watcher In The Woods
Feast
Jaws
Last House on the Left
The Exorcist
The Changeling
Poltergeist 1 & 2
Suspiria
The Bird With The Crystal Plumage
Phenomena
Tenebre
Inferno
Deep Red
Don't Torture A Duckling
Killer Klowns from Outer Space
Carrie
The Mist
Stephen King's IT
Stephen King's Graveyard Shift
Demons (1985)
The Club (1994)
Jacob's Ladder
Reeker
Seesion 9
Arachnophobia
Pet Sematary
Tales from the Crypt: Demon Knight
House on Haunted Hill (1999)
Switchblade Romance
The First Power
The Howling
An American Werewolf in London
Darkness Falls
The Descent
The Cave
Dead And Buried
Tremors
The Legend of Hell House
Ghost Story (1981, highly recommended)
Superstition
Child's Play
One Dark Night
Silver Bullet
Dog Soldiers
Cherry Falls
The Prowler
Night of the Demons
Videodrome
Rabid
Shivers
The Brood
The Serpent And The Rainbow
Prom Night (1980)
The Relic
Terror Train
The Gate
Don't Be Afraid of the Dark
Dr Giggles
Deadly Friend
Eyes of a Stranger
Cameron's Closet
Jeepers Creepers
Hatchet
Trick or Treat (1986)
Trick 'r Treat (2007)
Dolls
Piranha
Abominable
Daybreakers
Deepstar Six
Leviathan
The Rift
From Dusk Till Dawn
Fright Night
Vamp
Hell Night
Near Dark
Tourist Trap
Phantoms
Silent Hill
Scarecrows (1988)
Phantasm
The Fly (1986)
House By The Cemetary
Happy Birthday To Me
The Lost Boys
Bad Moon
Silence of the Lambs
Hannibal
Mimic
Dead Silence
The Funhouse
Wishmaster
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Anthropophagus
Rosemary's Baby
Cronos
Maniac
Waxwork
Prison
They (2002)
The Burning
Dead Birds
Salem's Lot
Asian Horrors:
Uzumaki
The Eye
Tomie
The Ring
Bio-Zombie
Kairo
The Grudge
One Missed Call
Dark Water
Phone
The Host
Zombie Movies:
The Beyond
City of the Living Dead
Zombie 2 (AKA Zombie Flesh Eaters)
Night of the Living Dead (Both Romero's original and Savini's remake)
Dawn of the Dead (Both Romero's original and Zack Snyder's remake)
Day of the Dead (1985)
Land of the Dead
Return of the Living Dead 1, 2 & 3
The Living Dead At Manchester Morgue
Shaun of the Dead
Fido
Night of the Comet
Dead Heat
Planet Terror
Cemetery Man
[REC]
Undead
Resident Evil (yes, I like the movies)
Tombs of the Blind Dead
Return of the Evil Dead
The Ghost Galleon
Night of the Seagulls

Science Fiction:
Event Horizon
The Andromeda Strain (1971)
Alien
Aliens
Escape from New York
Star Trek
Dark City
The Matrix (First one was WOW but the two other were 'meh')
Slither
Fantastic Voyage (1966)
2001 Space Odyssey
Moon 44
Looker
Altered States
Screamers
Westworld
Virus (1999)
Starship Troopers
Dune
Dreamscape
Shadowzone
The Abyss
Enemy Mine
Pitch Black
Tron
Immortal
Strange Days
Æon Flux
Sunshine
Barbarella
Cube
Scanners
Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956 and 1978 versions)

Next week: Videogames. (Maybe)


I know I've forgotten some. My brain is pretty much drained for the moment. There were also some movies I didn't add because they belong more in the slasher and thriller category. Some in this list should probably be removed because they fall in those categories. And the more movies I added to the list I realized that there are so many different sub-categories when it comes to movies that its' almost impossible to make a "clean" list.

I'm gonna eat I'm starving!

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!

Or

WHAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!

Or maybe not.
What is this big deal about turning 30? It's just a number, but still there's this little voice in the back of your head that tells you that you're getting older. Your mind may stay as young as it did 10 years ago, but your body grows older and there's nothing you can do about it.
So now I'm 30. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED? How did I suddenly go from 20 to 30? It's like I've been sleeping in between and suddenly reality takes a 360° degree roundhouse kick straight to my face. And afterwards rubs it with ammonia to make sure I really know what's going on.

And what have I accomplished during this 10 year of mental coma? Relationships have come and gone, jobs have come and gone, traumatized experiences have come and gone, the Grim Reaper have come and gone. But between all this, have I done anything I can look back at and say "daaamn I'm good"? I don't think so...

So now I have another 10 years to do something more meaningful with, and I have to say that I don't see turning 40 to be as bad as 30. I think media and the people all around us are to blame. We have grown up and are told over and over again that 30 is the death of the young and carefree life. It may have been in the past when our parents were young, but times change, as they always do.

Now let's have fun and set the city on fire.
Cakes for everyone!

Gah, in just one week from now I'm turning 30. Is it old? I don't think so, but it makes me feel old when youngsters here complain THEY are getting old when they just turn 21. Ya hear me? *Shakes fist*

I'm going to celebrate by stealing the youth of teenagers, sucking their lifeforce from their feeble bodies so I once again can push my hideous self under the magic 30. Because... These days it feels like the big 30 is the same as a death sentance. It may have been in the medieval times, but today turning 90 isn't a big deal anymore. Will that mean I still have 60 more years to spread my obsessions?

Just one week left of the precious 20's. And when that week is up I will undergo some kind of metamorphosis where a new me emerges from a slimy cocoon, all sleazy and dirty and ready to make younger people's lives a living hell by getting all clingy and perverse. Oh joy!


And this is also the perfect time to do that 30 movie meme. One movie represents one year of my life. Or maybe not. Anyway, if your brain haven't been taken over by brain parasites by now then read on.

01. The Shining (Stanley Kubrick's version)
02. John Carpenter's The Thing
03. Braindead (aka Dead Alive)
04. Black Sheep (2006)
05. Tokyo Godfathers
06. Young Frankenstein
07. Rabid
08. Shivers
09. Slither
10. Aliens

11. Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas
12. Labyrinth
13. Dark Crystal
14. Phantasm
15. What Ever Happened To Baby Jane
16. Paprika
17. Hellraiser
18. The Good The Bad The Ugly
19. The Royal Tenenbaums
20. The Secret of NIMH

21. Dark City
22. Tremors
23. Mad Max 2
24. Barbarella
25. Killer Klowns From Outer Space
26. Prince of Darkness
27. Dawn of the Dead (both the original and the remake)
28. Nightbreed
29. The Postman
30. Event Horizon

The fun thing with movie lists like this is that they aren't final, they change all the time. Because a final list would have been too small.
A top 100 list would be better.

If there's one thing I've learned about the furry fandom, is that everyone can be real douchebags and to put it simple: bastards. And that goes for everyone. 'Guests', fans and artists. They act like they have good intentions but in the end they show their true nature. And what you see is something rotten.

I learned it the hard way. You have a favorite artist, the art he makes is not only amazing, but everything from shadowing to anatomy is just perfect. Then you start to exchange words with him, they evolves to discussions, and in the end you have a person you can talk with. Everything from art to movies and landscapes.

So... In 2005 I was stupid enough to donate $125 to him through his webpage. There and then it seemed like a good idea. And he was in a financial crisis for the moment. Yes, I know I only have my own stupidity to blame. Then three months later (november) he said he should sell a big bunch of his sketchbooks. As a big fan of his works (not only porn and mature art, but everything), we agreed that I could buy it all for $400. I transferred $410 to him via Paypal, the ekstra ten bucks was for some bags of M&M's.

First I got messages that he was about to ship the stuff to me. That was ok. But it seemed like he never got around to do it. Then the typical excuses started to come. In the end he just ignored me. And no, I didn't harass him. You won't get any way by acting childish and nauseous towards persons, and that gives them a nice excuse to ignore you. When you start to harass then it means you've lost.
This is 5 years ago, and I know I'll never get what I payed for.

Sometimes you have to learn the hard way. $535 down the drain. People like this person.. It's these ones who ruins the trust many people tries to gain on the net. Being honest and trustworthy is a dying thing when it comes to the internet, and it's sad. I'm still angry at myself for believing in this person.

He have an account here on FA, I also have his full name and real live photographs of him. And I have to admit that I've been tempted to reveal him. Post everything, make a big wall of shame, but what does that make me? It will drag me down on his level, maybe further down. It's a bitter and loathsome thing to do and it will not get you any further. It will not help you, becuse it will somehow backfire and then you are the bad guy harassing a poor artist, and his clan of asskissers will be all over you like angry fireants.

You may wonder why I write this. Yes, why do I write this? First of all as a warning to all of you to be careful with your money and trust. The person you talk with may be nice on the web, but you know nothing of him in real life. Secondly to blow off some steam.
I'm also curious if any of you have been in this situation. What did you do to solve it (if you managed to solve it at all), and how is the best way to just let go of the irritation? It's like a thorn in my foot. I'm not sure who's I'm most angry at; me or him.

Thieves, they ruin your day.

Edit: He's been tagged in the Livejournal group 'Artists Beware'. Click here!

100 question meme, do I really want to?

1. How old will you be in five years?
34 years old (HAH, I'll kill you all)

2. Who did you spend at least two hours with today?
Myself. I've spent a lot of time with myself lately. I just don't hope it transforms me into a schizophrenic. (Oops, too late, french fries and Margaret Thatcher's hairdo are out to get me.)

3. How tall are you?
6'2" (it's not tall, believe me)

4. What do you look forward to most in the next six weeks
Probably getting my knee fixed, or getting involved in something grotesque. You never know what the future brings.

5. What's the last movie you saw?
Dawn of the Dead (2004 remake)

6. Who was the last person you called?
A friend of mine I told him I would piss him in the face, fart down his throat and shit all over the walls.

7. Who was the last person to call you?
My brother, he wanted to tell me that there's plenty of old office chairs in a dumpster next to an old post office nearby.

8. What was the last text message you received?
Hva? Hallusinerer du igjen nå? Eller sett for mye på Little Shop of Horror? Ta deg et glass vann og syng en sang høyt! Kanskje du får sjokolade av naboen.

9. Who was the last person to leave you a voicemail?
Haven't gotten one of those in ages.

10. Do you prefer to call or text?
Texting, with full words. THERE ARE NO SHORTCUTS IN THE LITERARY WORLD!

11. What were you doing at 12am last night?
Sleeping and dreaming horrid dreams.

12. Are your parents married/divorced?
HAH! They're divorced.

13. When did you last see your mom?
This thursday I think.

14. What color are your eyes?
Golden brown

15. What time did you wake up today?
Around 1 am

16. What are you wearing right now?
Blue jeans, black socks and burgundy colored shirt :)

17. Do you like Christmas songs?
Some can be charming, but Christmas isn't exactly my favorite time of year.

18. Where is your favorite place to be?
Either in the water or mountains.

19. Where is your least favorite place to be?
Traffic jam, it manipulates my blood pressure.

20. Where would you go if you could go anywhere?
Another dimension.

21. Where do you think you'll be in 10 years?
In jail maybe? Or in a nice job I really like? Hopefully not where I am now.

22. Do you tan or burn?
I avoid the sun, IT BURNS ME. And using a tanning booth creeps me out.

23. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?
Porcelain dolls. Heck, all kind of dolls. Hate them.

24. What was the last thing that really made you laugh?
An episode of Supernatural. Damn it felt good to laugh. And it was such a hilarious scene too.

25. What was the last thing that really made you cry?
Does crying in sleep counts?

26. How big is your bed?
200x180 cm. (it's big and it's delicious and it can fit more than two persons *unf* *unf* *unf*)

27. Do you have a laptop or desktop computer?
1 desktop, 1 laptop and 1 iMac that I don't use.

28. Do you sleep with or without clothes on?
All in the nude baby.

29. What color are your sheets?
It varies. Right now I'm using these ones.

30. How many pillows do you sleep with?
Just two when I'm alone, with company I just use one.

31. What is your favorite season?
Late Autumn. The frost, the smells, the colors, the freshness of the air. It's all worth desiring.

33. What do you like about winter?
The smell of an open fireplace, that you can be inside all the time, how the snow silences the surrounding sounds, the darkness and walking outside wrapped up in several layers of clothes.

34. What do you like about the summer?
Bathing outdoors, insect life, barbecuing, late summer nights with friends.

35. What do you like about spring?
Perfect temperatures and that speciall odeur in the air from all the plants spiring.

36. How many states/provinces have you lived in?
Just three and they're all the same.

37. What cities/towns have you lived in?
Three here too. Now I'm living in Sandnes (and no, it's not pronounced 'sadness', even if it's a sad place).

38. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?
It's like asking if you prefer food, water or fresh air. Stupid, stupid question. I like using shoes when swimming and bare feet when I walk on shattered glass.

39. Are you a social person?
I'm trying. I can go to social events but I feel more like a social chameleon, adapting and just faking it.

40. What was the last thing you ate?
Homemade stew with chunks of beef, onion, carrots, potatoes, rutabaga, parsley (both root and herbs), celery root, leek and ground coarsed black pepper, then added some salt.

41. What is your favorite restaurant?
In my country you can't have a favorite restaurant because there are no one worth having as a favorite. Bleh...

42. What is your favorite kind of ice cream?
Either chocolate or pistachio, it's hard to choose.

43. What is your favorite dessert?
Homemade crème caramel, I could eat that stuff forever.

44. What is your favorite kind of soup?
Fish soup, it also makes me tired and drowsy. Make me some fish soup and fondle me when I fall asleep.

45. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?
I have never tried an PB&J sandwich, but I would love to, they look so sweet and good.

46. Do you like Chinese food?
Hell yes, pump it directly into my veins.

47. Do you like coffee?
Now and then. Another thing: I've never understood that people can get so addictive to coffee, it's just dirty water. And people who go all crazy after some cups.. *cough placebo cough*. We have been told through generations that coffee makes us into the duracell rabbit on speed and we believe it. It's just crap. Anyway, I like coffee.

48. How many glasses of water, a day, do you drink on average?
I have nooooo idea. 10? 20?

49. What do you drink in the morning?
Milk, water, sometimes juice.

50. Do you have any phobias?
I hate dolls. They creep me out big time. I'm also a bit afraid of strangers in the dark.

51. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
If you are facing the bed then it's on the left side, against the wall.

52. Do you know how to play poker?
Not at all, but I would love to learn. I NEED MONEY! Gimme, gimme, gimme!

53. Do you like to cuddle?
Sometimes. It all depends on the situation. But I'm very ticklish so the situations often results in bizarre scenarios.

54. Have you ever been to Canada?
Not yet. Should I? I want to molest an RCMP (Royal Canadian Mounted Police).

55. Do you have an addictive personality?
What does that mean? That I can easily get addictive on something? Or that others get addicted on my personality? I know I'm addicted to Pepsi Max and sugar. And I can easily get obsessions. My personality is kinda boring so the only ones I know that can get addicted by that is old financial audits.

56. Do you eat out or at home more often?
At home. Have you seen the prices for eating out here? Christ on a bike, it's not cheap at all you stupid whores.

57. Do you believe in ghosts?
I think there's something unknown out there, but with people who lie more than Baron Munchausen and the modern technology that can easily manipulate proof I fear we will never know the truth until it happens to us.

58. Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you?
I know Carrie Fisher have her birthday the same day as me, but I don't know her personally and we aren't born the same year.

59. Do you want kids?
Seriously.. Can you see me as a father? We need less damaged minds in our society, not more.

60. Do you speak any other languages?
I speak english, then you have my native language. I can also speak swedish and dansih. That's four in total. Could speak french in the past, but I never used it so it have slowly faded away from my mind. Want to learn another language, but I'm not sure which.

61. Have you ever gotten stitches?
Oh yes I have and they still make me furiously mad.

62. Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
Not yet, maybe one day if I'm (un)lucky?

63. Do you prefer an ocean or a pool?
It depends on where and the weather. But change ocean with rivers/lakes/ponds and you have me sold.

64. Do you prefer a window seat or an aisle seats?
Window, then I have something to look at instead of the ugly people sitting next to me.

65. Do you know how to drive a stick?
I only drive stick. What is it with americans and their phobia for sticks? I thought at least that gay americans would love to drive stick.

66. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
Food, movies/videogames, comissions(?), travel, gadgets that I really doesn't need, comics.

67. Do you wear any jewelry?
Nope, I don't like having things attached to my body.

68. What is/are your favorite TV show/s?
Lost, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Space: 1999, The Prisoner, Lexx, Farscape, Black Adder, Futurama, Six Feet Under, Dexter, Twin Peaks, Family Guy, Frasier, Keeping up the Appearances, True Blood, Surface, South Park, The X-Files, Battlestar Galactica, Final Fantasy: Unlimited, RIGET, The Office (british version), Just Shoot Me, The 4400, Carnivàle, Millennium. Have I missed any? Probably.

69. Can you roll your tongue?
Yes I can, does it exist people that can't? I love tongueplay. ROLLROLLROLLROLL!

70. Who is the funniest person you know?
It must be one of my friends. He always have these small comments which makes me laugh. He's some sort of young Leslie Nielsen.

71. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
Nope, but I sometimes sleep with a stuffed person.

72. What is the main ring tone on your phone?
The whistling tune from Kill Bill (Twisted Nerve by Bernard Herrmann).

73. Do you still have clothes from when you were little?
Stuffed down in a box somewhere.

74. What red object is closest to you right now?
My lavalamp. It's so pretty. I love lava lamps.

75. Do you turn off the water while you brush your teeth?
No, why should I?

76. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
Closed, guess my childhood frights still resides within me.

77. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of bees?
I'll say a big bear. Bees are many but the bear is just one, even if it's punches can send my head flying through the forest.

78. Do you flirt a lot?
Just when I'm drunk. It's like playing with fire. Augh, and there some awkward memories showed up. :(

79. What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
Hmmm... Sweet'n Sour dip.

80. What is your favorite food?
Let's see.... EVERYTHING!

81. Can you change the oil on a car?
I'm a grudge gay so yes.

82. Have you ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Nope, I drive pretty stable. I should have gotten one many years ago, but the cop was my third cousin I hadn't seen in over 20 years, so I got away with a warning.

83. Have you ever run out of gas?
Yes. In a tunnel. During the night. With a drunken friend in the backseat that vomited like a professional Linda Blair.

84. What is your usual bedtime?
I don't have one.

85. What was the last book you read?
World War Z by Max Brooks.

86. Do you read the newspaper?
Online almost every day, but I'm not sure why because it always makes me depressed.

87. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Magazine? No, but many comic subscriptions.

89. Do you watch soap operas?
Sometimes, it's pretty fun.

90. Do you dance in the car?
Not anymore. Last time I almost drove over an asian guy that was crossing the road.

91. What radio station did you last listen to?
I don't listen to the radio anymore, it just pukes out bad songs by bad artists. I have a CD with many MP3's on. That's all a man need.

92. Who is in the picture frame closest to you?
I don't have any pictures of people in my home.

93. What was the last note you scribbled on a piece of paper?
Del 1A fra lege, 12 mars - 1 April Lever med ny sykemelding.

94. What is your favorite candle scent?
Candles with scents makes me nauseous.

95. What is your favorite board game?
Monopoly I think. And Scrabble. I need to play more board games.

97. When was the last time you attended church?
December last year during a funeral.

98. Who was your favorite teacher in high school?
My math and science teacher who looked like Ian Holm.

99. What is the longest you have ever camped out in a tent?
2 weeks, I never knew taking a shower would feel so nice after that.

100. Who was the last person to do something extra special for you?
A friend of mine with MS (Multiple Sclerosis) went through all the trouble of getting Night of the Creeps on Blu-ray for me.


Seems like I wanted to afterall. Now give me something nice.

I have had an itch on my brain for a while about zombies and fursuiters. Looking at pictures from Anthrocon you can't avoid seeing a bunch of fursuiters walk around. Now what if a zombie outbreak would occur. A worldwide one, real George A. Romero style. Would zombies know that there's a human inside a fursuit?

Think about it, all they see is something fuzzy and hairy. And if the person inside just walks slowly and don't say anything, would it be possible to walk through a mass of zombies to safety? In movies zombies surround houses because they saw some humans enter, or they peeked out and stared right in the face of the zombie. Zombies are stubborn and resistant, once they get their eyes on a human they won't leave. Ever. And this attract other zombies nearby, they see some zombies banging on the walls and doors at the hideout.

If you are hiding and don't let the zombies know you're there, they won't know. But a human can only stay in one place for a while, sooner or later it have to leave. (Get supplies, ammunation, someone in the group is starting to show signs of cabin fever, etc.) This is where the fursuits comes in. A SWAT guy is also mostly covered, but in 'ordinary' clothes. It's a shape easily recognized. But a fursuit is big and have a different anatomy than an ordinary human.

Can a zombie be fooled? And what if a person get bitten before he puts on his fursuit? You think it's a human inside, lets him into your hideout, helps him take off the head, and then you suddenly stare into this pale, decomposing face. Now that's a party pooper.

I'm always looking for ways to fine-tune my zombie plan. Any of you got any tips you want to share?

I'm bored, it's raining, the thunder is over and everyone I know nearby is asleep. So I'll just do this character survey instead. (But who reads these anyway?)


1. What is your character's name?
Draug

2. What is your character's name in another language?
Ehmm.. Draug?

3. How old is he/she?
It's an entity and doesn't have an "age"

4. What is your character's race/species?
He's a thing from norse mythology, mixed with the local folklore where I grew up.

5. Do they have a crush?
Crush? As in love or a habit of crushing the bones of people?

6. Do they have many friends?
A Draug is always looking for friendship, just don't go night swimming with him.

7. What planet is your character from?
Terra (That's planet Earth for you dweebs)

8. Does your character like to eat?
It depends on the location and mood. But mostly seafood and sailors lost at sea.

9. What's his/her favorite food?
Fresh meat from any species.

10. What's his/her favorite drink?
Fresh water or nectar of life.

11. Is your character annoying?
Only if you think it's annoyting to be dragged down in the dark depths of the ocean.

13. Is your character loved?
By some maybe. There's always someone who love something others dislike.

14. Is your character hated?
Mostly by fishermen and widows.

15. Is he/she emo/goth?
Not at all.

16. Is he/she straight, bisexual, or gay?
This one is gay.

17. Is he/she a virgin?
Nope, virginity was lost æons ago.

18. Name 3 hobbies
Swimming, terror, exploring.

19. Is your character normal?
What is normal? By modern day terms probably not.

20. Is your character attractive?
If you like green and slimy things from the sea then yes.

21. How does your character handle emotions?
Plays them like a guitar.

22. Does your character have other forms?
The Draug is originally a shapeshifter, so it can take many forms. But this one stays in hos original form most of the time.

23. Does your character overreact?
Rarely

24. Is your character a criminal?
He have probably violated every written law and rule.

25. Does your character go to school?
Nope

26. What's his/her IQ?
No one knows, but he's not a total vegetable.

27. Does your character have a disease/curse?
No diseases but some curses. Bad things often happens if he shows up at beaches.

28. Is your character dead?
Neither dear or alive. It's an entity. Hard do explain.

29. Does your character have a family?
Only the other entities.

30. Has he/she encountered any tragic times in life?
Have mostly caused tragic times in the life of others.

31. What's the best time in your character's life?
Every day.

32. If you could name 1 friend, which would you relate to your character?
I'm not really sure about this.

33. Is your character single?
For the time being.

34. Has he/she developed any relationships?
Some, but they have all ended badly.

35. Does she/she have an element?
Water

36. Do you roleplay your character?
I don't roleplay.

37. Do you write about your character?
Rarely

38. Does your character have a bad temper at times?
Who doesn't? We all get struck by the lightning which ignites the spark of rage that dwells inside us now and then.

39. Does your character get depressed?
Never

40. What's your characters favorite animal?
Fish

41. Does your character have any fears?
Religious fanatics

42. Does your character have any weaknesses?
Mostly handsome guys skinny dipping in the moonlight.

43. Does your character look up to anyone?
Cthulhu?

44. Does your character like music?
Everyone likes music.

45. What's your character's favorite type of music?
Golden oldies

46. Is he/she impatient?
Patience is gold.

47. What's something funny about your character?
He prefers being nude, but if he have to dress he puts on an old black sou'wester and raincoat.

48. Name 5 nicknames
Draugr, Cadaver, Kvernknurr, Fossegrim, Nøkk

49. Does your character curse?
Very often.

50. This test is over, what does your character have to say?
"I could kill for a slice of oreo cake."

I didn't know where I was or how I had ended up there. It was a moist cellar, but somehow I liked it there. A long vine of some sort came out of my body and started to search in all the cracks in the cellar roof. It found a hole and continued through it.
On the first floor was another me together with a woman. Both dressed in brown uniforms, I ran upstairs in fear, tried to get away from a truth I had forgot. I looked out the window and saw several black tornados reach down toward earth like tentacles. It was the past I saw, the truth about what had happened.

These chimneys of death swept across land and sea destroying everything. Turning the modern civilization to dust, I saw my home crumble, all life perished. Then there was nothing. A mass extinction, caused by something unknown. No humans left, only memories hovering as energy over the silent earth.
Æons went by, evolution found a new path, and on that path a new race of humans evolved. But not from mammals, but from plants. We were these towering, mobile plants walking across the landscape. Then out of one a human was born, pushed out like a butterfly from a cocoon. As the transparent coat of slime dried off the thoughts and memories of the old humans who had perished found their way into this new body, giving it some sort of soul.

I could remember it all, and I didn't like it. Opening the window to jump to my death the other me as a plant grabbed me and pulled me back in. Then a flower bud opened and revealed a big, red flower. Was it the heart? The brain? I touched it and a flash struck my eyes. We merged together, past and future, together in one.


My brain is trying to tell me something through my dreams but I have no idea what it may be.

Sometimes sanity feels like hugging a bunch of blind, epileptic nurses who are carrying chef's knives in a dark alley.

I've tried dream interpretation books but they give as much sense as my dreams.
Do any of you know people who can interpret dreams in a more non-gibberish way? The dream I had tonight is very similar to the dreams I use to have.


I invited a person from FA over to my place for some cake and video game playing. The said person was already eating a cake (white cheesecake) and commented on how much she loved the edge of cakes because they had the most taste. I ate some cake too and remembered I had baked two cakes for the visit. I went to the refrigerator but discovered they were both gone. It must have happened while I was at the bathroom, because I could hear some of my aunts walking into my kitchen uninvited while I was busy.
My apartment was sorta in between the first and second floor in the house where I used to live several years ago, so I dragged my body up through the hallway floor. There I met my father who told me how delicious my cakes were. I got real angry and started shouting at him, the rage wouldn't let go of me. He just told me I should relax because my relatives were in the next room. I entered the room and discovered my grandparents, uncles, cousins and some strangers all sitting comfortably in couches and chairs. They were happy to see me but I was still angry. Blinded by hate and dissatisfaction I punched them all in their stomachs real hard.

At the table I saw the rest of the cakes and took them with me to share with the one visiting me. I was also expecting a friend but he never showed up. Back in my apartment I gave my guest the cake but there was so little left that she couldn't determine a taste. Suddenly my father was back and told me a creature had smelled him and was about to tear down the house to reach him. It was a creature from his past, I can't remember it's name.
I also discovered that is was my brother who had stolen the cakes and given them to my relatives, even if he knew I had baked them for the visit. He was a manipulating bastard so I strangled him with a cable, I didn't feel sad at all. I was just so furious becasue of his manipulative behavior.

Suddenly I was my father and I had two sons that was completely unknown for me. One was named Jacob which tried to shoot my wife with a rifle. Instead of therapy I took my family with me out in a fjord where we could dive, getting or thoughts on other things than the failed attempt of murder.
Jacob would never have his right arm inside his body, it was just dangling. That was his murder arm. We were some meters down below the surface, looking at a dead coral reef. Then we went deeper. Much deeper. The darkness surrounded us and I feared the pressure would kill me.
(One of my fears is to sink down in the dark depths and feel how my head implodes of the pressure.)

Without a warning Jacob got a harpoon through his right arm. His blood was dark and thick, almost like a gelatinous mass. We were stills swimming deeper and deeper into the darkness, and the deeper we got the more blood was pumped out of his arm.
Then we heard a strange sound. Almost metallic like, coming somewhere underneath us. My fear gripped me and I tried to swim away, but we were trapped down there. Soundwaves made Jacob's blood form a strange pattern, almost like ancient symbols/writing. My wife read those and right afterwards a bunch of mutated, transparent sea anemones attacked her. They formed a ring around her and started to glow. The light became unpleasant to look at and when it was gone they were gone with it. The sound under me became stronger and more intimidating, it was directly unpleasant to my ears.

It was this creature that had been looking for my father for all those years. It was both an existing and not existing crature, somehow not of this world but still it was. This is all I can remember from the dream, I woke up right after with a bladder that was ready to burst.

There are some other small fragmens from other "chapters" in tonight's dream. Some of it involved me in a laboratory where I had fused different DNA's together in one body, and this body had become a hideous creature.
This creature managed to escape (big surprise?) and attacked everyone trying to stop it. It had a long, thin tongue it used to split persons in half with. The people it split in half didn't know they were mortally wounded until blood started to flow from their forehed. It looked like a small cut at first, but then it got wider and wider and you could see the person's face get all twisted as the brain started to notice all the damages.
Then their head would split in half, exposing the brain, cranium, musculature unde the skin, etc. It was a nice, clean cut. If it hadn't been for all the blood I'm sure I could have studied all the details. After the head had been split the rest of the body followed, the neck, chest, stomach and down to the groin.
It was easy to follow the experiment because of all the splitted bodies laying in the hallways.


Why can I never have more erotic dreams?

It's the same, every darn Spring, when insects and other critters get a doze of delicious sunrays and realize it's time to get busy living. At first they are slow, almost like me when I have a hangover. But after some hot days they are like a bunch of kids with ADHD high on sugar.

One type of insect that really annoys me are the wasps. I don't know why, but for some reason they are extremely attracted by me. Almost obsessed. They won't leave me alone, they surrond me and if I try to run they follow me. I don't like them, they are like moustached drag queens; masculinity trying to be feminime. Their attitude is also a big no-no. But here they are, stalking me, walking on me, touching me, spying at me through my window.

Are there any entomologists out there who may have an idea why wasps love me? I don't walk around with sugar in my hair or honey in my pockets. And I don't use perfume or after shave during the weekdays. Why don't I have this effect on men? But only wasps? I'm glad a mad scientist haven't shot me with a shrinking ray, because then I would definitely have been doomed. Probably molested to death by a gang of wasps.

What is this terrible phenomenon of new artists who tries to climb up the pedestal of fame by simply RAPING old classics? We're talking about a really deep, forceful, painful anal rape that leaves a gaping, bloody hole which is no longer what it used to be. Scarred for life, because a young bimbo or puppy eyed crème de la crème model with no brains or a teenboy who looks like the "after" image of a pimple removal commercial think they can take the world with storm by taking a classic song and turning it into something completely rubbish trash.

I feel I hear raped classics more and more. It's like a group of disgusting scavengers who digs in the ruins of a fallen house to get their greedy hands on something with a value. And when they find it they not only rapes it, but twists and turns it into something hideous.
And there they are, thinking they are the best in the world and that they deserve the same fame as Madonna and Jimi Hendrix because they took a fantastic hit and turned it into SHIT.

I die a little bit inside me every time I turn on the radio and hear a classic being performed by someone who belongs on the operation table in a mad scientist's lab. That is one of the main reasons for why I loathe listening to the radio. I don't know who I want to wipe out of the existence the most; the radio channels who plays those songs over and over and over and over again, or the artists who do the rape.

Sheesh, stop it. Please.

Ten things I wish I could say to people:

1. Let me help you hide the body.
2. It's only a flesh wound.
3. Wait, aren't you Tom Savini?
4. I never liked you.
5. Do you want me to get rid of the experiment?
6. No, your kid isn't adorable. It's ugly as hell.
7. Welcome to my mind.
8. Pardon my clumsiness, but I have never had sex with an alien before.
9. I'm going nuclear.
10. You killed me.


Nine things about myself:

1. I once smashed a table with the back of my head.
2. I'm 6,2" but I feel I'm still short.
3. I have a zombie plan.
4. I'm obsessed with water (rivers, streams, lakes, waterfalls).
5. I speak gibberish when I shower.
6. I don't like eye contact.
7. I love horror movies.
8. I really HATE porcelain dolls.
9. I'm starting to get bald, but my hair is also turning white. I don't know if I will be white haired or bald when I'm 40.


Eight ways to win my heart:

1. Have a brain and an independent mind.
2. Not afraid of playing it rough.
3. Like to have it tidy and organized around the living space.
4. Share my interests in insect life.
5. Make me laugh and smile (that's a sure heartmelter).
6. Being able to make delicious food.
7. Be a loonie that always surprises me with all kind of bizarre and weird stuff.
8. Respecting the elders.


Seven things that cross my mind a lot:

1. Food
2. Zombies
3. Demons/Monsters/Aliens
4. The Apocalypse
5. Water
6. Sex
7. Interdimensional traveling


Six things I do before I fall asleep:

1. Brushes my teeth (good dental health is good mental health).
2. Reads a comic or book.
3. Put on the alarm on my cellphone.
4. Scratches my groin area.
5. Turns off the light.
6. Thinks of one or more of the seven things that crosses my mind a lot.


Five places I want to visit:

1. The Amazonas Rainforest
2. USA
3. Australia
4. China
5. Antarctica


Four things I'm wearing right now:

1. Shirt
2. Boxers
3. Skin
4. More skin


Three musical artists that I listen to often:

1. Electric Light Orchestra
2. Blue Oyster Cult
3. Jimi Hendrix


Two things I want to do before I die:

1. Publish a book.
2. Travel to outer space.


One confession:

1. I once spermed in the food of someone I didn't like.



I tag you, you, you, you and you. But not you.