Although I began transitioning at the start of this year, it has been one year today that I came out to myself and began exploring a new relationship with my gender. It has been a year of highs and lows, of euphoria and despair, but always with a twofold goal: to embrace change, and defeat fear.

Regardless of how I feel on any given day, no matter how big the challenges seem or how lost I feel, if I think about how I felt as I stood on the shore before embarking on this wild, crazy journey, I cannot find it within myself to want to go back.

Wherever I end up, I know I owed it to myself to go – go, and find out what is on the other side. Because without that, I knew that life would not be worth living. The one precious life I had, the one story of my self that I had to tell, would already be over.

I am not ready for that. I made a promise to myself to life until my life was full, and I have traced anew the edges and contours of what I could be. And I could not wait any longer to know if dreams could be more than just dreams. If not me, then who? If not now, then when?

I am still learning about myself. In many ways, discovering myself for the first time, and challenging every assumption. Thank you to everyone I have met, past and present, who has had my back along the way. I'll see you next year. 💙

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