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♔ Update - July 2022 ♔
3 years ago
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Oh shit it's been 2 months?? ???
There's a lot that's happened with me
so let's break it down into the big 3 once again:
Health, Art and what's coming up.
Health: April was a fantastic month for me that sadly took a turn for the worst by the last day/first day of May. I started having really bad panic attacks back-to-back, every night I feared going to bed despite knowing nothing was stressing me out etc. It got to the point where I had to check myself into the ER every few nights for awhile just to get an Ativan shot to knock me out long enough to rest for a few hours. Eventually after being classified as a "Somniphobic" I broke down and said the wrong thing to the wrong nurse and ended up having CIT cops come to my home. They escorted me to the hospital, stuck me in a mental health facility out in Spencer, OK for 5 days and things got better slowly after that -- for a time. The nocturnal panic attacks started coming back but once I changed my diet and stopped doing medical MJ/having caffeine everything for the most part stopped. I still struggle with heart palpitations here and there but I'm seeing a cardiologist sometime later this month. Oh and they did a Sleep Study on me on like June 16th but they didn't find any sleep apnea, or rather not enough to issue me a cpap machine right away. ...But hey my blood sugar is getting easier to manage!
Art: There's just not much to say here. I feel an immense amount of guilt and disappointment for not having cleared my queue up by now but it's honestly so hard to get into art when you're suffering physically/mentally with all this shit. I hope those who I have left (I've been putting pieces out this past week, I have like 6 left total) understand and continue their patience with me. I am actually starting to get back into my normal routine again so I'm confident this coming week I'll be 100% back on track. Which is just as well, because I plan on reopening my Melty YCHs/making new adopts for awhile. I will need a slow ease back into comms before I open/draw new ideas for them. I want to ensure I'm back and know I can handle the extra responsibility because I hate making people wait on me like this. It sucks. If it all goes well though, I have a lot of ideas for art/merch type stuff so it could be a really good month for me. We'll see!
What's next? So since my medical hiatus I got a lot more organized in my personal/social life. I recently accepted a new trustee position for Oklahoma's Scissortail Fandoms Inc. (Sci-FI for short) and hosted another (HOT) successful SFE Summer Cookout with a bunch of locals. It got up to 104 degrees F out there in Edmond that afternoon but we had 48 people turn out, which was super rad. Hosting events/furmeets just fills me with such joy I just can't explain it. It's a magical feeling knowing you had a small part in bringing people together and watching new relationships blossom from those events. I think volunteer work through the furry fandom might actually be a calling for me as cheesy as that may sound. It's the magic of it all. I look forward to my new position with Sci-FI and helping my local con AnthroExpo continue its growth through the next few years as long as people will have me aboard. 🖤
So in a nutshell that's kind where I am at the moment. I want to again stress how thankful I am to the last few people on my queue for the Uppies YCH. I've never had to just walk away from work for more than a week so it's been deeply upsetting for me as an artist wanting to grow and hone my skills. A lot of people have told me they would rather me put my health before anything I owe them but I still feel terrible about it. So I will definitely be leaning more into adopts for a bit after I'm finished with things. I am making efforts so I hope it shows.
P.S. my schedule can be found here: https://twitter.com/BunnyQuartz/sta.....JIe5V7SSFh8vww
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