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Thank You for the Support
16 years ago
Thank you to everybody for your comfort and support. I'm feeling a little better since yesterday, at least enough to say what happened. Sorry for not saying sooner..
I remember most of its details.
Yesterday afterschool, me and my friend Gunner walked home from school as usual. We were talking about normal things that we usually talked about. The new Call of Duty coming out, homework that night, stuff.. Then there he sorta stopped talking as he was thinking to himself probably. It was that awkward silence an we hadn't had for a long time.
Then he started talking about girls and asking me what kind of girls I liked. He asked this question plenty of times before, but that was a long time ago. I just answered what I usually say.. Then he asked me why I never talk about my crushes to him. I just told him I didn't have anyone in mind yet. Then he paused again.. I was really nervous and he asked me why I was clingy to Apple during Halloween and other times. By now, I knew he was headed and I felt like I was about to cry... I thought this was the right time to tell him and to be honest since I was holding off on it for too long.. I could tell he was looking at me and I was trying not to look at him. And I told him that it was because "I like guys.." Then It was quiet and it felt like the longest time in my life. I really was about to cry at this point and I tried to hold it back.
When we got to my house, he just went home but he usually stays for a while. I tried calling him, but he never picked up each time. So I went to sleep for the rest of the day.
Today at school, he didnt come to school. He didn't pick up when I called, but he told my friends that he was sick so he didn't come.. I'm scared that he's mad at me or feels betrayed by me. I can understand since I've been lying to him for the past three years. I'm just really really scared of losing him.. He was my first real closest friend and my best friend since I came here.
I'm sorry for writing a lot.. I very much appreciate all of the support and comfort from everybody. Thank you again. I will get to replying to all of the comments and notes I have received.
I remember most of its details.
Yesterday afterschool, me and my friend Gunner walked home from school as usual. We were talking about normal things that we usually talked about. The new Call of Duty coming out, homework that night, stuff.. Then there he sorta stopped talking as he was thinking to himself probably. It was that awkward silence an we hadn't had for a long time.
Then he started talking about girls and asking me what kind of girls I liked. He asked this question plenty of times before, but that was a long time ago. I just answered what I usually say.. Then he asked me why I never talk about my crushes to him. I just told him I didn't have anyone in mind yet. Then he paused again.. I was really nervous and he asked me why I was clingy to Apple during Halloween and other times. By now, I knew he was headed and I felt like I was about to cry... I thought this was the right time to tell him and to be honest since I was holding off on it for too long.. I could tell he was looking at me and I was trying not to look at him. And I told him that it was because "I like guys.." Then It was quiet and it felt like the longest time in my life. I really was about to cry at this point and I tried to hold it back.
When we got to my house, he just went home but he usually stays for a while. I tried calling him, but he never picked up each time. So I went to sleep for the rest of the day.
Today at school, he didnt come to school. He didn't pick up when I called, but he told my friends that he was sick so he didn't come.. I'm scared that he's mad at me or feels betrayed by me. I can understand since I've been lying to him for the past three years. I'm just really really scared of losing him.. He was my first real closest friend and my best friend since I came here.
I'm sorry for writing a lot.. I very much appreciate all of the support and comfort from everybody. Thank you again. I will get to replying to all of the comments and notes I have received.
Nevertheless, I'm proud of you. And don't worry; everything will work out for the good. ^^ *hugs*
*hugs*
I hope things turn out for the best though. I know it can be tough to deal with and think about. But, it will blow over from time to time. Just try and keep us updated so we'll know what's going on. You'vegot all of our support here on FA.
-big huggles-
Trust me... Your friend will come around, if he truly is your friend.
oh deary *e-hug*...it was as good as time as any and he sort of knew or had his suspicions about it if he was probing for details. The upside is that you told him honestly and didn't attempt lying about it to him right to his face.
I wouldn't assume the worst just yet, some people just need a bit of time to work through it...people can mistaken unfamiliarity with a situation with other sensations easily.
understandable, a lot of people would prolly feel a bit hurt about not being told sooner and maybe even a little mad. Though the thing is if they have been friends with you that long, I think it aught to turn out for the best...its harder to be angry with someone you have known that long.
pffft...its alright, you are off-loading, so its normal to write a lot...de nada, you needed the support an what not...your welcome.
However, I will say that you just need to give it time. It doesn't sound like he told your other friends, so obviously he still cares about you. Maybe he's just taking a day or two off to collect his thoughts and figure out what to do about them. I went through a similar experience myself, and if your friend is a mature individual he'll come out of his stupor. But, be prepared for the inevitable "Why did you lie to me" question. It often comes up in these kinds of situations. I'm sure you have a good answer for that though, right? :)
I hope everything works out for you. Sorry to push my advice on you though.
Try Visiting him and talk to him. At least, you have the courage to tell him that. so? technically, there's a possible change he's not mad. OK? think Positive man
I hope he comes around, and he really should, you're a great guy and it sounds like at the least a good friend, and even if he doesn't feel the same way about you that you do about him, he should at least see how good of a friend you are and not let that get in the way.
You know... I belive it's something new and surprising for him... Give him time to get the idea, and you'll see everything is fine =3
No too long time ago... Something similar happened to me, with my best friend too... Only that, in this case, I said him that "I liked him", and this for 7 years, since we meet ^^;... After that, some days passed, and I was very scared because he didn't talked to me and I thought our friendship was lost... And you know what happened? After a few deys more, we talked as if nothing had been said by me, all normal, and I was the happiest fox in the whole world because everything was fine!
That´s why I know averything will be fine... If in my experience our friendship survived, even when the guy I liked was him and I kept that secret for such a long time... In your situation, I know that your friend will accept it and all will come back to the normal ^^
Good luck with everything, and cheer up, ok? =3
Atte. Alexandre Black Phénix.
*hugs* I hope you start to feel better soon, and that the rest of the people around you are supportive in all this.
Yes, there will be doubts in your mind, but until you can learn everything, all you can do is hope for the best. Hope for it, and everyone here will help you hope for it, too.
It's good you came out to your best friend and you've got nothing to be ashamed of, okay?
hope you feel better soon. *hugs*
i think you got a great group of similar stories above. bottom line: he must be shocked as hell, and he hasn't dealt with any close friend of his coming out to him before. high school coming-out stories tend to be kind of awkward, unfortunately -- people tend to just be stunned into silence from the HS coming-out stories i've heard. be very open to them in explaining how difficult it is to you (as it is to them), and this is who you are, and no one chose this but you're a good kid and folks will realize that this is what matters, this is what matters. and no, you were not purposefully hiding it from them with any malignant intention to deceive -- it's just really confusing and scary to sort out. a lot of us here have been there. you're a good guy, and you're the same good guy as always. please be fine -- things will be better.
Your friend has just realised that the person he is friends with is not who he thought he was. It's made him re-evaluate his perspective on everything.
If he's a friend he wont care and will be back to normal when he knows you still the same person just with slightly different tastes.
I hope its the best possible outcome, but seriously I'd hope he wouldn't throw years worth of friendship to the wayside cause of your sexual orientation.
and dont worry about it, i have faith that he'll come right around very soon
He has to understand that almost nothing will change between you and him (and also that you don't want to put your penis in his pooper...i mean it). Well, it seems he was talking about girls a lot. This won't make sense anymore to him, talking about them with you, now...you can't do anything about it.
You're worried about him. You didn't want to lie to people, but you didn't know how they would have reacted. You're sorry. It's the big deal here. But your friendship is not a lie. You care about him, cause he's your buddy. You want to play Call of Duty with him and hang out, and plenty things friends do.
HOWEVER being into guys is not a big deal. Life will just go on.
Try not to make a big deal out of you being into guys, because then the other people will think that it is indeed a big deal. It's not.
A good idea to get back his trust might be to tell him a bunch of secrets, answering his questions. Show that you trust him and can be trusted. You're friends after all.
---
Anyway, try to break the ice man! If you prove yourself to still be a good guy, with who he can have fun, he'll likely still hang out with you.
Just think a bit about it, and try to feel what would suit your friend best.
He had a bit of time to think about the whole thing, maybe he needs more, i dunno.
But if i were you, i'd like to make sure he's all right, at least from a health point of view...
Best of luck with that, try to relax *hugs*
I don't know where you stand with him in the whole friendship ring, but i'd need some time to evaluate our past...thinking of "signs i might have missed", "why"...alot of why(s)...There's gonna be alot of psychological bridges being built and burned...
I'm not gonna tell you i would continue my friendship ( i honestly don't know what i'd do...probably what your friend is figuring out), but if i didn't choose to maintain our past friendship, they/myself would have to live w/ it and move on. You're 18+...if not the end of the world...for either of you...
I don't agree w/ alot of people's lifestyle, but i'll give credit when people are honest...
Give the dude some time and space...if it's meant you two remain friends, best of luck to you...if not, don't judge him or make up a reason in anger...just move on
I remember when I came out to the first person in my life. My best friend. He did just about the same thing. He used to come to my house every morning and we would hang out before the bus came to pick us up. After I came out to him, he stopped coming over, and any time we met in the halls or I went to his house, he would ignore the subject, but he never stopped being my friend. It took a little time, but he eventually got over his trepidations and remains my best friend. The one with whom I share the closest, strongest bond.
(he's actually that friend I told you about. The naked one XD. Maybe that'll be Gunner in a year or so haha!)
We have looked at pron together, but I was looking at him. ^////^;;;;;;;;;;
If I may ask.
Give it time and I'm sure everything will be fine.
When you get the chance to talk to him, you have to remind him of what's important. You have to remind him that you're still the same person he's known since forever. What's one little detail going change with a friendship you've had for years. You like guys. So what? That doesn't change the fact that you're his friend.
Hmm... Unless he's just using the "I like girls" facade for something else...
Simple fact, nothing should've changed between you guys. Give him some time and then talk to him again.
I really hope that it works out well for you.
Sounds so heart breaking. Im glad everything worked out in the end.