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Of Art, Confidence, and that akin
3 years ago
I'm gonna prattle on into the void, but should the void want to speak in turn and offer advices I wouldn't complain.
I've been working on some stuff with my art. It's something that can't be shown as it's mental.
I have art, I have a whole stash. I just didn't want to post it.
So into my mind I go. At first I suspected it was the usual quality insecurity, the whole "It's not good enough" to post. I realized that was not the case. Trying to convince myself that was the issue, because that would be "easy", felt wrong, like I was hitting a wall.
I stepped back and had to wander the depths of my mind.
One thing I realized is "You don't have to do full polished pieces, you can just do things with less detail, things at different stages of the art process. A sketch can be just as complete as a full on painting"
Along with the "Draw what you want to draw"
I'm not doing any sort of freelance work, it is 100% okay to draw whatever I want.
I did a couple scribbles to help myself there (like so: https://tinyurl.com/ysc65ewr) Little known fact, I love drawing me some sighthounds!
The other, a major one is I'm afraid of being judged largely for my subjects. It's a little funny as it's not the typical "Oh no, I don't want to be judged for drawing lewd stuffs/porn" Still a SFW artist, sorry guys :P.
I haven't quite pinned down why this is the case, still working there. Especially since it's been things like drawing foxes or dog, or concepts for a 'sona (Shout out to
Shadowhide and his mate for being my sound boards and giving feedback). Perhaps it's the new subject matter that's coming with the potential 'sona?
Who knows?
Have any of you ever hit these walls? If so, how'd you get through it?
I've been working on some stuff with my art. It's something that can't be shown as it's mental.
I have art, I have a whole stash. I just didn't want to post it.
So into my mind I go. At first I suspected it was the usual quality insecurity, the whole "It's not good enough" to post. I realized that was not the case. Trying to convince myself that was the issue, because that would be "easy", felt wrong, like I was hitting a wall.
I stepped back and had to wander the depths of my mind.
One thing I realized is "You don't have to do full polished pieces, you can just do things with less detail, things at different stages of the art process. A sketch can be just as complete as a full on painting"
Along with the "Draw what you want to draw"
I'm not doing any sort of freelance work, it is 100% okay to draw whatever I want.
I did a couple scribbles to help myself there (like so: https://tinyurl.com/ysc65ewr) Little known fact, I love drawing me some sighthounds!
The other, a major one is I'm afraid of being judged largely for my subjects. It's a little funny as it's not the typical "Oh no, I don't want to be judged for drawing lewd stuffs/porn" Still a SFW artist, sorry guys :P.
I haven't quite pinned down why this is the case, still working there. Especially since it's been things like drawing foxes or dog, or concepts for a 'sona (Shout out to
Shadowhide and his mate for being my sound boards and giving feedback). Perhaps it's the new subject matter that's coming with the potential 'sona?Who knows?
Have any of you ever hit these walls? If so, how'd you get through it?
I don't know if it helps or if I've mentioned it or not; one thing that I often end up finding annoying in some way is how shaded/painted things often end up with quite a different feel and mood from the sketches that lead up to those painted pieces. It's even worse when the idea I had for or from the sketch actually ends up losing itself a bit in the process of shading and so on.
Although I do stuff for others through the commissions and stuff, I had the same issues I do now even back when I only drew "for myself". Similar issues around my choices of subject even with SFW themes, and also about the perceived quality. Themes is less of an issue now because I realised I don't like "one-trick pony" artists and I don't want to become one myself (except in certain circumstances).
To deal with the issue of perceived quality and its effect on confidence, over time I've tried to avoid posting in places that have restrictive or specific standards of what quality is supposed to be; FA is pretty good in that regard I think; dA is too flooded with "perfect" art for that, for me.
Also dealt with it by accepting that I can always try to improve on how I do things, yet also by realising that most people really don't care that much about the actual technique involved in some art piece. Finally, I also avoid looking at other peoples' work in similar subjects when I'm in certain moods. Lately I can't look at any other macro art at all, because my lack of time/energy for practise lately just brings up the complicated feelings of frustration and jealousy, especially within the context of perspective and foreshortening. Need to do a journal on that (negative feelings and their impact on psychological "drive").
And yes, better technique does mean that more people will look at our art, but that's partly down to "wow" factors and other factors related to immediately grabbing attention; something our society now breeds so well, right? I see art that is very attractive to the eye but is technically unremarkable; that doesn't mean the artist is bad at all, it means they're clever about how they "budget" their use of technique. I'm sure we will both see really good art technique from artists who are virtually unknown. They may have excellent technique, but people don't necessarily care more just because of that factor alone.
Do you know or can you guess as to what drives your fear of "choice of subject"? Do you think that might be just within the context of FA, where other subject choices tend to dominate, or just in general, including outside online life maybe?
I realized that if I kept waiting for the right feeling to post my art, I would never take a step forward. I had to share my art even though I didn't think it was quite good enough yet.
Lastly, I did away with any notion of followers, like-counts, commissions: I just focused on doing what was fun for me.
I'm still a little nervous about sharing my art but so far people have been pretty supportive. I think you will find much the same. Your art is lovely.
I actually hadn't considered comparing myself. As I tend not to think in terms "I wish I was as good/advanced/popular/*insert other mindset here*".
Pondering on it though I *am* prone to thinking "I am x age, I should be better". Been like that since mid-20's or so (31 atm) Which I suppose is pretty just the brain saying the same thing in a different ways.
A friend and I (actually the one who also responded) have discussed the follower/ popularity thing. In my DA days I would see that kind of advice...and I took it to the extreme. I pretty much operate under "I'm talking to myself" when it comes to postings. Not in an "I'm not popular" kind of way... I suppose a more...cynical? Hope for the best but expect the worst, wait, wait, no, assume the worst.
Thinking about it, that may be a big cause of this. A sort of "There's no need to post if no one's seeing it. I can see my art without posting should I want to."
Logically I know my art, when posted, is getting looked at, cause seriously, I don't think one could post here and get 0 views XD Negative feelings don't care about what logic says though.
I think one of the things I do need to do is, as you said, just post. First need to scan a stash, as scanning/sditing is also a hurdle of mine XD Being on the desktop, not fun. (At one point I was going to set up a day/date to just dedicating to scanning and edit. At the time I wasn't really doing art though. May have to toy with trying to put it into practice.)
I'm so glad your experience here and sharing have gone well! I love seeing other traditional artists, I'm glad you were to find that motivation to post. I always appreciate when artists are able to show form with more minimal shading, rather than rely on contrast to do so.
I'm looking forward to seeing more of your art (though I am very much a lurky-lou. Something else I may need to work on).
Thank you so much again. You got me thinking about things I hadn't considered! Helps with plotting on how to beat my brain at this muck!
I've never considered scanning in older works, mostly because my skill and style shifts from sketchbook to sketchbook. I want people to see what is current so I only post what I just finished making that I want people to see. I do have a few pieces in scraps that I changed my mind about though lol!
Finding other traditional artists is hard these days. Not sure if you've seen https://www.furaffinity.net/user/cannedtalent/ - also worth a watch. He inspires me very much!