✨ Good evening, dear friends and clients! 🌙

I’m stopping by to give you all an update on how things are going! 🥺💖

I’m still doing physical therapy 3 to 4 times a week, as the doctor recommended, to prepare for my upcoming surgery.

I won’t lie to you- it hasn’t been easy. The pain is…... immense. Even now I still have swelling around my right knee; it has gone down a bit, but it’s not completely gone yet… 😔 As you know, after the knee injuries from the accident and all the resting time, my knee started to “protect” itself by stiffening up. This is called arthrofibrosis - it’s like a kind of “atrophy” that gets worse over time. So in physical therapy, we have to FORCE the knee to bend, a little bit more every session, to gradually “release” the stiffness. But honestly, it feels like my entire knee has turned to stone.

It hurts so much that I have to bite down on a towel because I cry and scream from the intense pain..... every session. It’s embarrassing sometimes because other patients at the clinic come to check what’s happening. I try my best to stay quiet, but the pain when they push it is so intense that everything goes black for a moment, and I feel like I’m leaving my body. It’s a pain like they’re ripping my leg off - no exaggeration. (And I used to have a really high pain tolerance, seriously!! This is something completely new to me.) Just writing this here gives me chills. But I’m trying to stay strong. I have to......it’s for my health!! Time is ticking...

After each session, I’m in a lot of pain for the rest of the day and the day after. It only starts to ease a little by the third day… which often comes with moments of vulnerability, lots of crying, and anxiety at home about the whole situation. I feel a little embarrassed sharing this with you, but it’s the reality.

So many people have been believing in me and sending positive words, and I feel I need to be honest and transparent, this is what it’s really like.

When I’m back home, my knee slowly stiffens up again, so I’m still using a walker around the house, or crutches, or leaning on Kyan for support. That’s why it’s so important to keep the sessions frequent so we don’t lose progress!

To help you understand better: the doctor wants me to “release” my knee enough to bend at least 90° ROM again, and also regain some of the muscle I lost, most of the lean mass in my leg, because after surgery my body will weaken again and try to “protect” the knee with the same inflammatory process that caused the arthrofibrosis. We absolutely cannot let it form again on top of the previous one, or it could become impossible to bend my knee without surgically breaking the adhesions (a risky procedure that could even break/damage bones.... we really don’t want that). So, the road is long and painful… but I know it will be worth it in the end. 🌸

The orthopedic surgeon said that doing this pre-op physical therapy will help a lot with my recovery after surgery. Once I hit this milestone, we’ll be able to schedule it soon. I have a new consultation on the 23rd, and I’m waiting on the doctor’s next decisions.


>>> The good news? So far, we’ve made progress! We’ve managed to release the knee to 45° ROM! ✨


It might not sound like much, but believe me.... it came with a LOT of pain. Still, I know it’s our first victory, and we need to celebrate it. Soon, we’ll hit the 90° target and finally be cleared to schedule surgery! After that, it could take 1 week to around or a litte more than 1 month (hopefully sooner) to actually schedule it.

I’m doing my best. I have faith that everything will work out. 💖 I’m also seeing a psychologist now, which has been essential during this time.....

Between the painful days, on the days I feel a little better, I’ve still been working on art, though at a slower pace…

Recently, I received some unexpected donations on Ko-fi from old and dear clients (seriously, I’ll be eternally grateful!!). Thanks to them, I was able to get a new display tablet to work with. It’s helping me SO much since I’m stuck in bed most of the time. At least now I don’t have to balance my computer and a thousand other tools on my legs anymore..... it’s just the tablet, and that has been a huge help! I truly believe it will make me more efficient and help me finish commissions faster. 💖

I realized I’d been working “the hard way” all this time, using old tools and outdated software (as much as I love Paint Tool SAI....… phew!! 12 years together!). All of that was slowing me down, but I really think things will improve a lot now with my art overall. (Thank you so much again for making this possible!! But that’s a story for another day.)

I know I have commissions pending, and it’s been making me so anxious, especially because most of them are literally 99% finished. With the new tablet, I’ll finally be able to complete them soon, I promise!! Things have been so chaotic lately, and these have been some very dark times in my life. 😞 *facepalm*

P.s.: The rest of the donations I’ve saved and been saving entirely for the surgery costs and the related costs like physical therapy!!!!

I’ll be forever grateful to everyone who donated, even the smallest amounts. You’re all amazing, kind people. Every tiny bit helps so much with everything going on right now, and I’m truly, deeply thankful. 💖 (P.S.: Please don’t worry if you can’t donate! Just your kind words, supportive comments, and likes help me a LOT. You’re incredible!! Thank you infinitely!!)

Honestly, I never expected to find such kind, caring people here in the furry fandom and online, in general... Wow!!! 💖💖💖

And I dare say… it’s not even surprising anymore that my online friends have given me way more support than most people in real life, and even some family members. That’s life, isn’t it? well...

To all of you, I just want to say a huge THANK YOU for your patience and support during this tough time. 🥺💕💖💖💖💖💖
It means a lot!!!!!!

I’ll keep doing my best and trying to keep my head up, my friends. 💖💖💖💖

I know we’re going to win this battle! 🌸

Sending a big warm hug,
Millie <3