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Thoughts + "ghost accounts" (check-in #7)
4 weeks ago
General
Hi! Fair warning that this one will be a little more serious and unhappy
Some happiness to start with, so that this journal isn't just me crying into the void: I met a new friend, she's really sweet and we like to play video games together late into the night. We laugh so hard and it always makes the hard days easier <3
Halloween came and went and I never put together the costume I wanted to show off here, maybe next year? Things have been so hectic lately I totally forgot to get anything I needed to make the costume
Moving on to the hard part of the check-in:
My partner left me near the end of last month. I'm still upset over it and I wish it hadn't ended so suddenly, I saw it coming, it seems like my relationships always end up the same way & that's a big reason I stopped dating initially. I thought maybe it would be different, & maybe I would be ready to try again now that I'm an adult in my 20s but things aren't too much different I guess, lol
I also look at dead/abandoned accounts a lot lately, either on here or on another social media site or on YouTube, and it makes me feel sad even if it's someone I don't follow. I feel so tempted to comment how I wish they would return, just leave a message on their page that someone is thinking of them & someone misses them, even if we don't even know each other & they probably won't ever read what I write. One of my biggest fears is being forgotten, if I were to vanish from here someday for some reason I don't want my account to just sit with nobody to appreciate it or think of me, and I don't want that to happen to others either.
I hope that I can see a light at the end of the tunnel soon, because I need it a lot right now
Some happiness to start with, so that this journal isn't just me crying into the void: I met a new friend, she's really sweet and we like to play video games together late into the night. We laugh so hard and it always makes the hard days easier <3
Halloween came and went and I never put together the costume I wanted to show off here, maybe next year? Things have been so hectic lately I totally forgot to get anything I needed to make the costume
Moving on to the hard part of the check-in:
My partner left me near the end of last month. I'm still upset over it and I wish it hadn't ended so suddenly, I saw it coming, it seems like my relationships always end up the same way & that's a big reason I stopped dating initially. I thought maybe it would be different, & maybe I would be ready to try again now that I'm an adult in my 20s but things aren't too much different I guess, lol
I also look at dead/abandoned accounts a lot lately, either on here or on another social media site or on YouTube, and it makes me feel sad even if it's someone I don't follow. I feel so tempted to comment how I wish they would return, just leave a message on their page that someone is thinking of them & someone misses them, even if we don't even know each other & they probably won't ever read what I write. One of my biggest fears is being forgotten, if I were to vanish from here someday for some reason I don't want my account to just sit with nobody to appreciate it or think of me, and I don't want that to happen to others either.
I hope that I can see a light at the end of the tunnel soon, because I need it a lot right now
In the chaos after a break-up, coast through it any healthy way you can, and once things feel a little normal, like you can eat normally or sleep normally, start focusing on yourself, like doing a small thing that makes you smile. That's always important, but allowing yourself time to think through your emotions first will gain you experience in navigating those tough feelings, and then make the work it takes to build yourself up feel a little easier.
We can all get through this, you are not alone ^^