"In August, came to CYD in order to assert his heterosexuality and to explain why the furries hated him: He was 100 percent straight, he smoked, he was conservative, and he brought females to conventions, because he was not gay. He stated, restated, and then stated some more that he really loved women and was totally straight, and then went on to call everybody else gay. Literally; he responded to every negative post by calling the poster a closet homosexual or a homophobe, and he did so in the kind of haughty manner that makes you want to plunge your hands through your computer screen and wrap your fingers around the throat of the person on the other side.

After babbling endlessly that he wasn’t gay and everyone else was, Cigarskunk began to ramble about cigars and how great they were. It was fetishistic: “Cigars, cigars, cigars, by God, I love cigars. My favorite color is cigar-brown. Cigar smoke, cigar smell, cigar taste; cigars are fucking great. I really, really like cigars. Cigars make my day. Cigars have a Zen-like quality to them, and they’re so damn good. Ooh, yes, cigars. I think about cigars all the time. I fucking love cigars.”

Rest assured, by the time his ass was banned in record time (after a mere 3 posts), everyone knew that he really, really, really loved cigars. Afterwards, Cigarskunk pounded out essays of staggering length, detailing how everyone at CYD was a lunatic and all the hate was heaped upon poor little him. Plus, cigars were great. Everyone pointed and laughed."


HAHAHAHAH WHAT A BITCH YO