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The promise of a new day
8 years ago
yeah it's the title of a Paula Abdul song...eat me XD
Just realized how long it's been since I even updated this journal shit... I guess I should keep things up to date more. So yeah, here we go...
-Still trying to fix my life... realizing that "fix" may not mean what I originally thought...Thinking of trying to get into starting hormone therapy...I know I want to but I honestly haven't even looked into it... I feel like I have other things to fix first, like losing weight and getting back into shape...dunno if I'll ever do reassignment surgery, it'd seem a little selfish if I'm incapable of bearing children...
-Still a happier girl than a sad one, even though I have my regrets and my shames... I know that I have to keep moving forward and keep looking up... I have sworn my heart and soul to others, and I swear I will honor that allegiance no matter what... I am loved, and that is all it takes to start making a difference in the world.
-Still living in the backwoods of Arkansas, got my own place with plenty of space. Overall the whole thing is a work in progress but I have already designed what I want it to be like when I'm finished... just gonna cost like 20-40 grand of modifications and additions, plus furnishings...
...still hurting... but it means I'm alive... the pain in my heart means I'm NOT a monster... a machine, perhaps, but not a monster...
guess it isn't the biggest, best, most informative thing I could post...but at least it's not a mopey pile of emo crap like I sometimes post...
Just realized how long it's been since I even updated this journal shit... I guess I should keep things up to date more. So yeah, here we go...
-Still trying to fix my life... realizing that "fix" may not mean what I originally thought...Thinking of trying to get into starting hormone therapy...I know I want to but I honestly haven't even looked into it... I feel like I have other things to fix first, like losing weight and getting back into shape...dunno if I'll ever do reassignment surgery, it'd seem a little selfish if I'm incapable of bearing children...
-Still a happier girl than a sad one, even though I have my regrets and my shames... I know that I have to keep moving forward and keep looking up... I have sworn my heart and soul to others, and I swear I will honor that allegiance no matter what... I am loved, and that is all it takes to start making a difference in the world.
-Still living in the backwoods of Arkansas, got my own place with plenty of space. Overall the whole thing is a work in progress but I have already designed what I want it to be like when I'm finished... just gonna cost like 20-40 grand of modifications and additions, plus furnishings...
...still hurting... but it means I'm alive... the pain in my heart means I'm NOT a monster... a machine, perhaps, but not a monster...
guess it isn't the biggest, best, most informative thing I could post...but at least it's not a mopey pile of emo crap like I sometimes post...
If you need someone to talk to about gender issues, feel free to shoot me a note. There's actually a transgender support group in Fayetteville, if you live closeby there. That might help, too.
Gender Reassignment surgery isn't selfish, dear. There are plenty of cis/bio women who can't reproduce, either. It's not about reproduction (remember there are plenty of transgender women who aren't even into men), it's about being happy with your body.