Today I am a year older. Or possibly yesterday/ tomorrow depending one what time zone this gets published in. Regardless, the point is that I have aged a complete year and can say that I don’t really feel any different from the year before, at least not in a positive way. While it’s true that I do feel more existential and depressed, my OCD seems to have gotten worse in some areas, the days sort of just become one long day, like all the others. The times I have lived have been my own, yet still I feel like the days show no difference. I don’t know if I’ll ever feel the difference in age. Maybe I’ll just slowly come accept that I am a year older now. Maybe one day the feeling will hit me like a proverbial brick wall. I just look at my life and think “What have I done so far” especially when compared to other people that I know. “Where is my life going” is also another question that goes through my head as I attempt to make sense of how things got to the way they were. There are things I look back on to try and find out what happened to them. I look forward at the goals I want to accomplish and wonder if I will ever achieve them. I wonder about my passion and drive. I suppose one of the good things that happened has been my creativity growing, but with that comes the realization that I have not managed to successfully complete a story. That I know what I want to happen, but the smaller details elude me. So as a birthday present, I ask anyone reading this, if they even care, for some advice. A way to help me, if you can think of any. Thanks.