I find myself rather unmotivated lately, yet relatively happy, though that emotion is slowly going away. Being the introspective person that I am, I tried to figure out a logical reason to this peculiar change in my mood.

I traced back to the beginning, which was a long period of depression. This eventually lead me to conclude emotional pain is eternal and is merely a part of nature, no different than gravity, and to be upset by a force of nature is idiotic. This lead me to analyze what happiness is, and my ultimate goal to achieve relative happiness, which motivates me to move on. The pain I felt every night was a motivator for me to wake up everyday, always reminding me why I should stay alive. However, the pain lessened over time and I thought it was because I've gotten a higher tolerance for it. Eventually I even feel a bit happy, which coincidentally lead to my lack of motivation.

I think this lack of motivation is due to the happiness, since the extended period of happiness removed stress from me and made me forgotten about the pain, it also means I lost my motivator. As my happiness continues over time, it becomes normalize and therefore relatively speaking, I will no longer be happy since a higher standard norm is set in place. Being unmotivated and lacking any real progress to achieve the ultimate happiness I seek, my well being will once again decline and cause stress since I can no longer maintain the norm. This will drag me back to depression and pain, which motivates me again, until I get use to it to reset the norm to a lower standard, and then I will relatively be happy again, and on and on and on.

Quite an interesting and inefficient cycle of motivation, but at least it makes sense and fit into all my other theories.