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5 years ago
I didn't want to leave my latest journal entry as something on the depressing side, so I wanted to write a quick update on here.
Things are going well in my life. I'm married to a wonderful Maned Wolf. Been with him for 13 years now.
I graduated form College 3 years ago (2017). I completed 2 degrees in 5 years (Math Degree and Physics Degree, a lot of overlap, with a Comp-Sci minor). I graduated just below highest Latin honors (Still got Magna Cum Laude, just barely missed Summa Cum Laude). It was hell. Working a full time job while going to school full time for 5 years took more hard work and dedication than I ever want to do again, but it opened a lot of doors for me.
I did poorly in the Physics subject GRE and the Math subject GRE. For those who don't know, these are subject specific tests that are separate from the General GRE. I originally planned to go to Grad school, but I just didn't have it in me to study for the tests specifically. I did poorly, and kind of ran away from Grad school. Didn't apply anywhere, and just kept looking for work as a developer (what I already was doing before, and during school). I won't lie, I felt like a failure, and like I wasted those 5 years of my life. I'm not sure if I'm right or wrong on that, but the fact of the matter is I'm doing well now, so no point in wanting to change the past.
I've gone through multiple jobs, but this latest one is a tech giant, and I've been working here for over a year. It has been great growth for me. A lot of technologies I've never worked with before (A lot of AWS stuff), some new coding languages, and more responsibilities.
I got into car racing. Specifically AutoCross. I trophied at a Solo National racing event (they give trophies to the top 25% of people in a class, so it's not like I made podium). My husband is a big car enthusiast and loves racing, so he got me into it. He regularly beats me on simulators and in races in general, but I enjoy the thrill of it, so when this pandemic is over, I'd like to revisit that.
My fitness and general health are pretty good. Doing a lot of body weight exercises since I don't have access to a gym during this pandemic. A lot of running and DDR as well. It keeps me in shape.
Outside of all of that, I'm still pretty isolated and keep to myself. Still timid, still introverted, but I've learned to accept that. I have strengths others do not, so I'm okay with the weaknesses. I'll work on those.
Things are going well in my life. I'm married to a wonderful Maned Wolf. Been with him for 13 years now.
I graduated form College 3 years ago (2017). I completed 2 degrees in 5 years (Math Degree and Physics Degree, a lot of overlap, with a Comp-Sci minor). I graduated just below highest Latin honors (Still got Magna Cum Laude, just barely missed Summa Cum Laude). It was hell. Working a full time job while going to school full time for 5 years took more hard work and dedication than I ever want to do again, but it opened a lot of doors for me.
I did poorly in the Physics subject GRE and the Math subject GRE. For those who don't know, these are subject specific tests that are separate from the General GRE. I originally planned to go to Grad school, but I just didn't have it in me to study for the tests specifically. I did poorly, and kind of ran away from Grad school. Didn't apply anywhere, and just kept looking for work as a developer (what I already was doing before, and during school). I won't lie, I felt like a failure, and like I wasted those 5 years of my life. I'm not sure if I'm right or wrong on that, but the fact of the matter is I'm doing well now, so no point in wanting to change the past.
I've gone through multiple jobs, but this latest one is a tech giant, and I've been working here for over a year. It has been great growth for me. A lot of technologies I've never worked with before (A lot of AWS stuff), some new coding languages, and more responsibilities.
I got into car racing. Specifically AutoCross. I trophied at a Solo National racing event (they give trophies to the top 25% of people in a class, so it's not like I made podium). My husband is a big car enthusiast and loves racing, so he got me into it. He regularly beats me on simulators and in races in general, but I enjoy the thrill of it, so when this pandemic is over, I'd like to revisit that.
My fitness and general health are pretty good. Doing a lot of body weight exercises since I don't have access to a gym during this pandemic. A lot of running and DDR as well. It keeps me in shape.
Outside of all of that, I'm still pretty isolated and keep to myself. Still timid, still introverted, but I've learned to accept that. I have strengths others do not, so I'm okay with the weaknesses. I'll work on those.
I'm in a similar position to what you were in (recently graduated w/ physics, worked and went to school at the same time, second highest honors, struggling to feel like I'm good enough, etc.), and it is really comforting to see that someone's life is fine despite things not going as planned.
I really needed to see this, thank you.
I hope you have and can continue to grow in the ways that work best for you and your life.
Thank you. I've been going through some rough health issues at the moment, so a kind word from a stranger was incredibly uplifting.
I do hope you're able to find what you need, but also don't fall into the same traps I did. The GRE isn't the end-all-be-all, and a lot of schools are going without them. Sometimes the fact that you held down a job, and have professional references and academic references can carry you further than a test score. People want to know you're a hard worker, and working while going to school is never easy.
Don't let it get to you, and don't let it define your worth. You're more than an end result. You're all the hard work you have and continue to put into yourself <3