Hi, Aya! Awwrr, I always miss you, hun! ;w;

I'm hanging in there. Still rattled from a harsh, vindictive, toxic falling out against me by a BFF of mine around last Christmas that has left me heartbroken, creasfallen, and out-of-sorts (can't even pick up a tablet pen anymore, that's how distraught I am), and my sleep habit and health has been out of sorts since... but I'm still here, doing my best. X'(

...Among any positive news, I'm enjoying the warmer weather, we've been working on fixing up Grandma's house here and there (for future presentation purposes), and when I'm not helping out however I can within my power, I've been out either walking or getting my suntanning on out in the backyard! XD lol

Plus I got my first COVID-19 vaccine earlier this month; now I gotta wait for my next one in September! :3

Hope you're holding up all right! I always enjoy chatting with you. ;w;

As for cute OCs, I sure hope mine are cute! >w<

LEO NEKOZUKI'S 2020 REFERENCE (BY neuli): http://www.furaffinity.net/view/37740343

LEONA MIKA'S 2017 REFERENCE (BY neuli): http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25912301

SEBBY INUNIKKO'S 2017 REFERENCE (BY neuli): http://www.furaffinity.net/view/25775248

Thank you very, very much for the sweet opportunity! ^w^

Leo! I'm so glad you responded <3 ; I was actually really hoping you would see this lol Anytime I think about this site I wonder how you're doing, since I knew you'd been having a tough go of it but wasn't sure how to ask >.< lol

I'm sorry to hear that happened. Losing a best friend is awful and it sounds like you had a really traumatic experience.

I'm glad your still able to look for the positives; I'm trying to train myself to do the same. The Summer sunshine and greenery tends to perk me up as well ^.^

Your OCs are SUPER cute and I would love to draw them soon! Thank you for the opportunity! <3 <3 <3

Awwrr, I'm happy to have responded, Aya! I enjoy sharing comments and messages with ya! ^w^ You were, eh? Glad I discovered this journal then! X3 lol Aw, wow... You do? That means so much that you think of me when you think of this site. ;3; No worries, there's nothing wrong with asking me! I'm never offended; I'd tell you anyway if I were uncomfortable with you asking anything, but that's pretty rare. XP lol But yeah, now that you mention it, things have been rough here and there; not just personally but life-wise, too, at the house. Namely the stuff I just brought up but also Grandma's condition gradually getting worse (she is palliative care after all).

Yeah, it... It wasn't a pretty picture. She overreacted to me not getting back right away over something admittedly serious. But I was busy at the time getting Christmas shopping and errands done with my older brother. And she took it personally since 1) I knew she messaged but didn't get back till late in the evening, and 2) there was a big negative rift between us at the time anyway due to me supposedly being the only one not reacting (positively) to her new union right away even though it was clearly unhealthy for her to jump into something new after several failed relationships before. It's a super-long story. But yeah, not getting back to her in time caused her to take it too personally and blow things way out of proportion; even when I did reply, she still hated my guts, leaving FA and the fandom and openly blaming me and seeing the fandom as nothing more than a sex cauldron when that had nothing to do with the situation. Didn't help that she had a whole slew of mental conditions and identities, making her snap so easily and turn on all her friends including her best friends like me. So yeah... She's made me feel like an accident and a terrible person to this day, making me feel like shit and that I'm the sole reason she left the fandom, disowning me as her best friend. I'll always remember the nice and real side of her, but whatever possessed her then... I'll never forgive her. Not again. She's manipulated and abused me three times already. Never even gave me a chance to defend myself and/or won't listen to me. It... It's been breaking my heart since. Can't focus much lately. Been even having days where I wish I was... well...

...But I'm hanging in there. Not sure why now, but I'm hanging in there. Guess I'm too stubborn to go that extreme.

I try to, Aya. It's all I can do since those memories are chained to me and branding me a loser. That's good; I'm glad you're striving to look at things in a better light. I'm trying my best to, but that toxic incident and COVID-19 aren't making things any easier.

Yeah, the spring and summer weather certainly charges me up for sure. :3 I'm a summer lion at heart; I love the warmer/hotter weather! ^w^

Awwrr, you really mean it, Aya? :'3 Thank you very much! I'm glad you'd love to draw any one of them! It's a real honor getting any sweet drawing from you! You are awesome, and you should feel awesome!

Oh Leo! My heart breaks for you! I have a lot of anxiety around responding to texts or things sometimes, I hate 'read' receipts; I feel like texts are for being able to respond whenever you can up to a day or so later, calls are for emergencies. Having our cell phones constantly glued to us and being at someones beck and call like that can be so stressful, especially when dealing with someone who has mental conditions that make their mood shift on a dime for something as small as not responding to a text right away. I know it hurts beyond words but you are doing the right thing by being done with that friendship.
I've more or less lost contact with one of my best friends, and while it wasn't a negative end (she just stopped reaching out ever) it still breaks my heart even 8 years later.

Hang in there for future you; you never know what kind of wonderful thing might be around the corner.

What kind of Summer activities do you enjoy? I just really love all the colors and green stuffs. And Summer smells! Like neighbors grilling, and flowers, and the smell of fireworks!

And Awww >///< Thanks! That really means a lot to me! <3 For some strange reason I really want to draw you as a Samurai, with aspects from your ninja outfit transferred over to traditional samurai garb; and! I think you'd look adorable with your hair up in a samurai pony tail! Would it be ok to outfit/style swap you like this?

Aw, Aya... I truly do appreciate your empathy. Thank you. ;_; That's understandable; I hope I don't try to cause any anxiety with any of my replies, especially on Telegram with my other friends! And yeah, for real... Now that you mention it, she did have a mental condition. Actually, loads of them. Bipolar disorder being one of them. You can imagine how vicious and vindictive that was towards me.

Yeah... Whether anything bad happened or not in your case, you get how it's still rather hurtful and sad to not hear from them anymore so suddenly. Just like me. It hasn't been a full year yet since she left me, but my heart still breaks, missing the part of her that was warm, caring, empathetic, sweet, and funny... I'll always cherish those times. I've even kept some memories of that to this day, how open, thoughtful, and fun she was... But her toxic, broken, entitled, closed-minded, manipulative self I'd rather do without. All the former qualities I'd love to look for in a new best friend (who would also be a woman), one whom I'd look forward to waking up and talking to every day. ;w;

You're right. I'll never know what'll happen. Painful as those emotional scars are, I gotta hang in there... I'd love something wonderful right around the corner soon. :'3

Not too many activities I can do in the summer where I am right now (Innisfil, which is pretty much the middle of nowhere, far away from civilization), but what I enjoy doing is sun-tanning, talking walks, exercising (if gyms were ever open again), and hitting baseballs if I'm ever in the mood for it. Then of course, there's video games and YouTube, but that's every day. lol Yeah, all those colours are cool, especially red, yellow, and orange! :3 I love the soothing feel of water to swim in and the rays of the sun cooking me all over to make a healthy tan! X3 Can't go wrong with fireworks either of course! Ooh, firepits are fun, too!

Awwrr, you're very welcome, Aya! Just being honest~! ^w^ Ooh, a samurai? :D That'd be a neat idea honestly! :3c Yeah, I'd love to see you try that, applying a samurai look with his ninja gear inspired on it! And that'd be cool seeing his mane/hairdo in that style! X3 By all means, go for it! It's totally okay! :D Thank you so much, Aya! You're so sweet! ;w;

YOU ALIVE, BLESS.

I IS ALIVE!!!!

But you don't got strawberry shortcake ice cream. :3