Foreword and friendly warning

Alright people, I'm not gonna lie, this topic is one that's probably gonna step on a lot of toes so get ready. As of late, it seems like all everyone around me has been talking about is babies and kids: from my coworkers talking about their kids they have, along with the ones that don't have any kids, however, are planning how many they want to have...to random people out and about discussing babies, their kids/grandkids/nieces/nephews and asking where is yours and when it's on the way. Let's face it, it's one of those topics that once you hit a certain age, usually your 20s, is unavoidable. So what do you do when people bring it up but you have no interest in the topic or worse, you don't want kids?

Well, that's what I'm hear to rant about...the story of a raging wolfcat that finally got fed up of everyone talking about babies and how "you're gonna want kids one day..." lecture finally just made me snap ...and again, I'm not kidding people- if you have kids, kits, pups, kittens, whatever you want to classify your demons...err, I mean "bundle of joy" as, or you just like or want kids one day? I highly recommend you stop reading right now. Because my views after this point are gonna turn vicious and you won't like them one bit. I'm not trying to be callous, really I'm not but I know how defensive some of you can get about this topic, especially if you want kids but can't have any or you actually have some and consider it the greatest joy of your life...more power to you and I'm happy that having children makes you happy. Again, not trying to step on any toes, this entry is just my opinion on kids, childbirth and all that fun stuff. Take it with a thin grain of salt and don't come whining to me if you read it even after the warning and you didn't like it

And on that note...

So what brought on this topic in the first place? Well let me tell you what happened to me this morning. I got off work around 8 and me and my mother ran to the store to pick up a few things, you know, just a casual trip to the store...or so I thought. My mom ran into one of her old friends she hadn't seen in forever and they spoke for a while, catching up, reminiscing, you know...being women. Anyway, my mom's friend made a comment about how one day I'm gonna have kids-

...and that's when it all started *sighs* Now before I finish this story and tell you how it ended, I need to digress a bit so bare with me.

I hear enough of that crap at work, hell I work at a hospital for goodness sake and am surrounded by kids. Now don't me wrong, I don't hate kids, I just don't -want- kids, big difference. But I swear society has created this stigma where it's just assumed that you will get married or get in a relationship, have a kid(s) and live happily ever after or until you divorce your spouse and move on. Sounds great huh?

Yeah, sounds crappy to me too, especially the "have a kid" part. For as long as I could remember, like when I was a kid, I was just against the thought of having any demons. When I was growing up, I watched a lot of trauma and medical shows so I actually watched the "miracle of life" happen...and I cringed at it. There is nothing beautiful about being in absolute pain only to produce a little spawn of terror that have to raise for 18+ years. So fast forward to now. I'm 26 years old, time for the old biological clock to start ticking huh? *points to a disabled clock missing several bits and pieces* Yeah, right. Trust me, if I had my way, my tubes would be tied right now but noo...our glorious government feels every woman deserves to have at least one child first or have a medical condition before that can happen. And since neither of those apply to me? yeah, I'm screwed for now. So option 2- either find a guy that's sterile or I load up on some damn good birth control to keep any accidents from happening. Well I suppose there's option 3- find a guy willing to get his tubes tied, which ironically, the process for them to do so is so much more easier than for a female it sickens me...probably because they know not many guys willingly do so. Pfft, thanks for making my life that much harder. Hell, I'm sure they'd stop abortions too if they could (yes, I'm all for abortions and proud of it).

So I know what a lot of you are wondering as I get asked this question a lot- why don't I want kids or what do I have against them? I just don't want any...and don't give me any of that "you just haven't met the right guy..." crap either. No, any guy I date, I always make sure to ask them how they feel about kids, because I can tell you right now, that's an instant deal breaker. But ultimately, I guess you could say I'm selfish. I don't want to share my mate with a kid. I don't want to spend hours up listening to crying, whining, cleaning up vomit and feces or wiping their snotty little noses. No, I don't want any late night trips to the hospital because I'm afraid what might be just a fever could escalate into something worse. No, I don't want to have to reorganize my life and finances to fit a child into the picture. I'm the youngest of two, along with some steps as well so it's nice be settled and alone right now. I'm at the point in my life where I just want my close friends around me and eventually a worthy guy to share my life with. So you can imagine when others hear all this, they're either in utter disbelief or disgusted by what I say, especially coming from the south where such thoughts are unheard of *rolls eyes* Leave it to me to rebel against the norms of society and not look back...

So back to my story from earlier. As I was saying, when I was at the store with my mom, her friend made some comment saying how I'm gonna have a kid one day. No, I wasn't gonna hear that bull. Now I was nice about it...at first. I simply told her that I had already decided that I would not have any children and figured she'd leave me alone after that. Ha, of course not. You know how the older generation can be, they swear they know what's best so she said "No, you will, you just need to give it time..." (...). Okay, patience was starting to wane at this point. Now my mom was there so I had to bite my tongue while still trying to get my point across so again I politely said that no, I will not have any kids and even went so far to say if I could, I'd get a tubal ligation if it were possible. Okay, that hit home as she was slowly starting to back off. However, at this point, we were standing near the deli in the store (I wanted to grab some dinner for work tonight) and one of the girls there was listening in and you could see such a look of disgust and confusion on her face...I merely smirked at that, somewhat satisfied and continued to go on by saying how I've felt this way for years and NO ONE will change that about me, no man, family and if for some gah awful reason I get pregnant, there will be some damage control (aka abortion) involved asap.

Well that certainly shut up everyone and gave me some funny looks as a result. My mom merely said I can be so hateful at times: I'm not hateful, I just know what I want out of life and children falls into the "not" category. As I grabbed my food from the deli (at the point, the cashier was speechless and I don't think she'll ever look at me the same way again), my mom tried to talk some sense into me, asking me what will I do if I don't have kids? Who will take care of me when I'm old and alone? I just shrugged and said I guess I'll be alone and miserable with my dogs and left it at that. Now what kills me is that me and my parents have discussed this topic before, me not having children that is, and I thought we came to an understanding that me+kids = unhappiness. Hell, my sister has enough demons of her own to appease my mom and my dad has enough grandkids of his own to look after. Why do they want more?! But when I first made this statement years ago, my mom was all for it, she actually seemed happy. Yet this morning, she was upset...I don't get it. Sheesh, must be a maternal thing I suppose. Hell, I'm not screwing up my life over a kid like my mom did (again, no offense to you people out there that have them, assuming you're even reading this or made it this far). I think that's another reason I'm so hellbent against having children as I've watched them...I won't say destroy but "alter" people's lives, either in a good or bad way. My mom is the perfect example. When she was my age, she spent all her time working and when she wasn't at work, she was trying to fend for herself and my siblings. She always wanted to do so much more with her life but guess what? she had to put the kids first like any good mother would do. How noble right? but now that's she's older, she has so many regrets...so much she wishes she could have done but it's too late now. All because of what? putting her family first. I don't want that...at all. And yes, I know that's not always the case with people and it's never to late to change your life but guess what? I'm not gonna risk that so meh.

So that's my thoughts on the matter. Sorry again if I offended anyone but hey, it's my body, my life and if I choose not to let another demonic spawn loose on our already overpopulated planet, so be it. If anything, I think I'm doing the world a favor. It seems like the ones that don't need kids are the main ones having them...which bothers me more than you can imagine. So what happens if for some horrible reason I do get pregnant? as I said above, abortion or morning after pills. Yes, I suppose I could do adoption as well but meh, I don't think I could fathom nine months of torture just so someone else can avoid it and go straight to the "fun part" of raising it. Nope, though we'll see...or not see huh? I have a feeling a lot of people are gonna look at me differently after reading this; I know they certainly do after hearing me say all this stuff. It's funny, people are so presumptuous at times; I guess everyone just assumed that I like kids and would just naturally have kids *snorts* So please, if you're reading this entry, please do not ask me if I want or plan to have kids...hmm, actually I should post this somewhere public for future reference because I know I will be asked this again and again until people get it in their thick skulls.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna find me a cuddly dog to take care of- that's the closest thing to a child you'll see me with. Yes, they're like children but guess what? less drama, they're obedient, they'll always love you no matter what and hey, if I want to travel? pack them up and take them on the road with me, they don't care. All they know is that they're about to go somewhere and want to go with you. Kids? extensive planning, setting money aside for food and other expenses, or if they can't come, gotta find a babysitter or someone to tend to them. Which yes, you can do the same thing with pets too but guess what? at the end of the day, they're still less trouble than a human.

*This entry has been made possible by the men and women against having children. You don't have to agree with us, just respect our choice in life.