What can I say, how about a summery:
- Got a real job for once (getting close to four years now)
- Got a little quiet place of my own
- No more chasing hopes and dreams, no more drawing, no more programming
- I can afford the expensive food like vegetables now
- I'm really getting old now, I should post a pick of me.
- I got into brewing, I drank my self into a bad place. I'm struggling to stop drinking
- Lost tons of weight. It's amazing how much weight you lose when hunger doesn't hurt as bad as eating. (due to drinking too much).
- I feel like a dirty old man on these dating web sites
- Still, I'm happier alone; no drama, no noise; Not happy, but happier. The drink makes me happy, but I have to stop now.
- I'll have to give it all up to get a wife and have kids

Why do I want a wife. It's not because a want one, it's my duty. So many fucked up people in this world. I'm ashamed to call myself human, hence being a fur. I want to bring some one into this world I can be proud of. Teach them what people couldn't or wouldn't teach me. My father threw some time and some effort at raising me, but in the end, he just through money at any my problems and walked away. I didn't need his money then, and I don't need it now. Although, for my kids, I don't have the money to do much, so my kids are going to have it rough, I know that. I just hope they will be good humble strong non-victim people I can be proud of.

I want to be alone; Just me, internet, and drink. That's happiness. I have to have a wife and kids, do my part in making the world better. This is the first world issue I am currently struggling with. If my dating-site bio doesn't run off any potential wife, and if this journal doesn't run them off, and they still can love me. Then they'll have a loyal man until the end of time.