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Operation and Sexuality
9 years ago
Bronchitis - 1993 - 2008
Depression & Social Anxiety - 2008
Chronic Fatigue - 2010
Suicidal thoughts - 2010
Overwhelming rashes and allergic reactions that never physically leave - 2012
Eye infection that has left a dry skin mark on my right eye - 2014
Reoccurring illnesses (ear, eye infection and tonsillitis) - 2014
Mild Anxiety - 2015
Keratoconus - 2016
On August 12th I am going to be having an eye operation for my right eye. From the vast eye infections in the past, and compulsive and obsessive rubbing when my vision is unclear or my eye/lids are itchy it has reduced the quality of vision in that eye. So much that it has become a serious health problem. From what the Doctor told me I got an Eye Disease (Keratoconus) from rubbing it so much as well as the eye itself having a particular anomaly. My left eye has the same anomaly but it hasn't become as much of an issue. My vision in my right makes light distorted and drags it down and a bit right. If it is a light with many small bulbs to make it appear bigger, I see 2/3 dragged down but in a line to make the light an large oval with the remaining bulbs at the top still normal.
So basically my message for the day is, try not to rub your eyes. I fucking can't stop but I wish I could.
Additionally, for a long while I've been doubting my sexuality. Not like it's a big deal but it still means something to me. I kept hearing and seeing shows and people having crushes on people and while I've been in relationships I never felt attracted to a person. People can look good (I'm speaking IRL in context) but it doesn't do anything for me. Sex can turn me on if I see real porn but if I imagine myself in the same situation I get grossed out in many occasions. I love furry art and anything to do with characters I like the look of. But they're not real. I look at the human population and myself and find the same answer of 'We're all not as sexually good looking as we like to imagine ourselves'.
I think I am borderline Asexual, but Greysexual because I ain't convinced that I don't feel sexual attraction for people. I still feel attracted to individuals but it is mostly due to personality, connections, friendship and strong affection. It doesn't really change anything though I ain't going to be getting a real-life boyfriend or girlfriend for a very long time. That fact doesn't really bother me as now I can feel better about not really needing them right now. I've got my porn for the mood I am in at times and that's all I need. I'm pretty happy about that.
Depression & Social Anxiety - 2008
Chronic Fatigue - 2010
Suicidal thoughts - 2010
Overwhelming rashes and allergic reactions that never physically leave - 2012
Eye infection that has left a dry skin mark on my right eye - 2014
Reoccurring illnesses (ear, eye infection and tonsillitis) - 2014
Mild Anxiety - 2015
Keratoconus - 2016
On August 12th I am going to be having an eye operation for my right eye. From the vast eye infections in the past, and compulsive and obsessive rubbing when my vision is unclear or my eye/lids are itchy it has reduced the quality of vision in that eye. So much that it has become a serious health problem. From what the Doctor told me I got an Eye Disease (Keratoconus) from rubbing it so much as well as the eye itself having a particular anomaly. My left eye has the same anomaly but it hasn't become as much of an issue. My vision in my right makes light distorted and drags it down and a bit right. If it is a light with many small bulbs to make it appear bigger, I see 2/3 dragged down but in a line to make the light an large oval with the remaining bulbs at the top still normal.
So basically my message for the day is, try not to rub your eyes. I fucking can't stop but I wish I could.
Additionally, for a long while I've been doubting my sexuality. Not like it's a big deal but it still means something to me. I kept hearing and seeing shows and people having crushes on people and while I've been in relationships I never felt attracted to a person. People can look good (I'm speaking IRL in context) but it doesn't do anything for me. Sex can turn me on if I see real porn but if I imagine myself in the same situation I get grossed out in many occasions. I love furry art and anything to do with characters I like the look of. But they're not real. I look at the human population and myself and find the same answer of 'We're all not as sexually good looking as we like to imagine ourselves'.
I think I am borderline Asexual, but Greysexual because I ain't convinced that I don't feel sexual attraction for people. I still feel attracted to individuals but it is mostly due to personality, connections, friendship and strong affection. It doesn't really change anything though I ain't going to be getting a real-life boyfriend or girlfriend for a very long time. That fact doesn't really bother me as now I can feel better about not really needing them right now. I've got my porn for the mood I am in at times and that's all I need. I'm pretty happy about that.
