Hiya everyone, I want to give an update on where I am and also kind of ramble a little bit, I am still working on coming back but still taking it slow.

I'll start with the more light-hearted stuff. For the past couple of weeks I was on a trip which has helped me unwind and during that time I was able to let go of a good chunk of my 40k stuff. All of my Orks, most of my Chaos stuff, the few Deathwatch, some Space Wolves and a battleship for Battlefleet Gothic along with some old ww2 tanks I did a while ago. Which means I was able to knock out my next force and I am really looking forward to it, some of the stuff has already come in with a couple things already assembled and primed, I have just been waiting on a specific one that recently arrived as I think it will be a great way to kick off starting the army and also to aid in another project to help with miniature storage, switching from foam to using magnets. Foam isn't bad if you are starting out but it is worth looking at other means of miniature storage as foam can and will damage your miniatures over time especially if there are horns, spikes and other protrusions and if you have models holding things like spears and banners it will catch on the foam and you risk breaking that part of the miniature off.

Speaking of which for my new force I will be using exclusively 3rd party miniatures to help show the cheaper alternatives are way better than what GW offers and also they are way cheaper too. Honestly you can find pdf's of the rule books and codexes fairly easily and the second hand market is healthy when it comes to the books themselves, just do some prior research to make sure you are looking for the right ones, this is to help show that GW is not needed to enjoy 40k and the other systems. Heck even the second hand market for GW models has just gotten ridiculous given the cost almost matches the rip off of GW itself.

And yes some GW fanboys and store owners do hate my guts with a passion because I along with quite a few others help point out the flaws and better alternatives.

At some point I will get back to my Dark Angels and plus I have been thinking of adding to my Grey Knights, but one army at a time for now and plus I am trying to get the whole model storage squared away first^^; Heck for fantasy I even have some thrid party stuff for Skaven I had forgotten about but still interested in doing.

I also have a couple models in mind to either help throw in between the submissions for the army I am building or just afterword, to be fair I have been sitting on one for a little while.

Now since I'll be going back to seventh edition exclusively for 40k basically I have come up with some house rules for it and I am pretty sure others have adopted these as well to help patch up the game a little. Which I will share when I submit the model after it is finished, which will be tomorrow.

*Sighs* Now onto the more deep stuff....

Mentally I am still coming around but as I said above I am just taking it slow and focusing on my projects, on the bright side I have been working on some lore and stuff for the Magna-Verse off and on, I still don't really have the will to draw and type up another part of a story but I am slowly feeling better here and there, still going day-to-day, but I am feeling a little more better. I have touched on it here and there, but I will fully admit that I do have low self-esteem, I think that there has been evidence of it but I wanted to just say it outloud. I deeply love and appreciate the support that I have been shown, it has been helping me, the problem is my mind still has a lot of negative emotions that had built up overtime from before I joined FA and I didn't realize just how bad it really was. It is another thing I have talking off and on here and there as I have talked of my constant low morale and how I basically still have scars from Balto Source. I have also been pretty hard on myself I will admit, that is pretty easy to tell especially when it comes to the submission I did when it came to me talking about my creative writting, it honestly went from me doing it for fun to me losing sight of that due to the fear of it being another Journey situation which is obviously not something I want for the Magna-Verse or any series really.

To help myself get my thoughts together I needed to basically unplug, unlike my other attempts earlier this year I just did what I said I would and let it run it's course rather than try to do a speedrun for recovery. The past year has been really crazy with me dealing with everything I have been talking about with getting away from the bots, morale and so on... but I am doing what I can to try to get back on track properly and more importantly get back into the doing it for fun mindset I really use to have. Honestly part of it has to do with embarrassment from getting hooked on the bots and I have been slowly coming to terms with it better. But looking at the comic I made a while back has helped alongside what I normally do to collect my thoughts and blow off some steam,heck I finally got around to trying out that new Umamusume game and it is a pretty relaxing mobile game overall and even picked up the anime which has been a great watch, I have only watched one season so far, but it was cool checking something new out.^^

Alright, I think I'll call the update here, I just wanted to help show that I am doing a little better and also to show I am not trying to force a recovery like I have been trying to do for months and that I am doing my best to get myself back around in a better and more natural way.

I know I have stepped all over here and there, but I hope everyone is doing well and you are having a good day or night where you are *hugs*