Explain Your Hobby Badly
9 years ago
I sit hunched over a desk for hours on end, staring at a computer screen, making incremental changes to Photoshop documents and agonizing relentlessly over minutiae most people won't even notice, hoping that the end result will yield enough e-validation to fill the gaping crater where my self-esteem is supposed to be.
I also like to ruin my knees while daydreaming about being a beautiful, intelligent, talented, rich, overachieving hero set to a soundtrack of the same five or six songs on repeat that I will eventually get tired of as mosquitoes chase me through hot, humid flying spider-infested Florida backstreets every night for about an hour because I have trouble accepting the increasingly difficult to ignore fact that you can't out-exercise a bad diet and if you want to be thin, especially if you come from a family with a strong genetic predisposition towards obesity, you can only eat the things you like once in a very rare while or in such minuscule quantities that you might as well not be eating them at all which relegates you to either eating so little that you feel like you're constantly starving or eating things you absolutely loathe with the seething hatred of a thousand suns such as beets, carrots, and celery that smell and taste like literal, actual poison to you because your parents were idiotic fuckknobs who raised you on a diet of pure sugar so everything that doesn't have sugar in it tastes like bullshit and you're probably going to develop Type 2 Diabetes at some point but perhaps if you exercise excessively enough you can stave it off until your patellas disintegrate at the age of 40 which is coming up a lot more rapidly than you would ever have thought possible because time seems to speed up exponentially with every passing year which makes you afraid to blink as you might suddenly find yourself playing bingo to a soundtrack of wheezing, coughing, and nebulizers but even that is probably fairly optimistic as you'll be lucky to make 45 before that heart attack, stroke, or aneurysm finally decides to happen.
I also occasionally like to sit down with a hunk of dead tattooed plant matter and disengage from reality because that is much more enjoyable than doing the other things I should be doing instead such as paying bills, vacuuming, dusting, talking on the phone with health insurance representatives from India who I can't understand, and interacting with escaped Dunning-Kruger research monkeys in an attempt to sort out why my internet moves at the speed of grass growing... in a place where there is no grass... and why my DISH TV box keeps recording Game of Thrones en Español even though I have it set to record the English channel.
(Would you believe me if I told you I'm actually a decently happy person for the most part? :P)
I also like to shart my navel-gazing prattle into textfields so that maybe five or six other people will read it and reply with their own comments which is more satisfying than doing other things I should be doing like taking a shower and doing the laundry and generally being an adult.
I also like to ruin my knees while daydreaming about being a beautiful, intelligent, talented, rich, overachieving hero set to a soundtrack of the same five or six songs on repeat that I will eventually get tired of as mosquitoes chase me through hot, humid flying spider-infested Florida backstreets every night for about an hour because I have trouble accepting the increasingly difficult to ignore fact that you can't out-exercise a bad diet and if you want to be thin, especially if you come from a family with a strong genetic predisposition towards obesity, you can only eat the things you like once in a very rare while or in such minuscule quantities that you might as well not be eating them at all which relegates you to either eating so little that you feel like you're constantly starving or eating things you absolutely loathe with the seething hatred of a thousand suns such as beets, carrots, and celery that smell and taste like literal, actual poison to you because your parents were idiotic fuckknobs who raised you on a diet of pure sugar so everything that doesn't have sugar in it tastes like bullshit and you're probably going to develop Type 2 Diabetes at some point but perhaps if you exercise excessively enough you can stave it off until your patellas disintegrate at the age of 40 which is coming up a lot more rapidly than you would ever have thought possible because time seems to speed up exponentially with every passing year which makes you afraid to blink as you might suddenly find yourself playing bingo to a soundtrack of wheezing, coughing, and nebulizers but even that is probably fairly optimistic as you'll be lucky to make 45 before that heart attack, stroke, or aneurysm finally decides to happen.
I also occasionally like to sit down with a hunk of dead tattooed plant matter and disengage from reality because that is much more enjoyable than doing the other things I should be doing instead such as paying bills, vacuuming, dusting, talking on the phone with health insurance representatives from India who I can't understand, and interacting with escaped Dunning-Kruger research monkeys in an attempt to sort out why my internet moves at the speed of grass growing... in a place where there is no grass... and why my DISH TV box keeps recording Game of Thrones en Español even though I have it set to record the English channel.
(Would you believe me if I told you I'm actually a decently happy person for the most part? :P)
I also like to shart my navel-gazing prattle into textfields so that maybe five or six other people will read it and reply with their own comments which is more satisfying than doing other things I should be doing like taking a shower and doing the laundry and generally being an adult.
FA+

I also Throw paint and glue at small plastic figurines and then proceed to chuck dice onto a big table in with there are small scale buildings and we have a variety of dice, and books for this unusualy expensive and complicated game.
I also grab a battery powered projectile weapon, and fill it with small white pellets, and then i put on a silly looking outfit, and launch the pellets out of the battery powered projectile weapon at my friends
Also, I enjoy recreating the same picture again and again with minute details changed each time so I can trick people into thinking a still image is moving. These motions often also include graphic sex and body deformations.
I do also like to obsess over data in a console that I can manipulate by use of a piece of plastic with button for thee sake of accolades that don't really exist except on said console. Most of these also include violence, sex scenes and fantasies that may mark me as a maniac.
Jk
i grew up before everything you could buy in the store besides raw veggies had a ton of sugar in it.
what i hate is physical exercise, which i try to make up for by eating as diversely as i can, and in a moderation i don't always achieve.
everything i enjoy involves sitting, one way or another. walking from my tiny room to the bus stop, from another bus stop to a store,
three out of four times a grocery store, which is about three times every two weeks, because i don't have room for a larger fridge,
to lay in supplies for longer at a time, which is just as well, because having to go to the store is most of what exercise i get.
model trains, making art on computers, at home, three steps from my bed, reading, even riding buses and trains when i do pry myself away.
which i should be doing now instead of sitting here.
but i love it. i love pretty shapes and colors. more then ever having to be around the same people very much. and i'm able to appreciate people more when i don't.
everyone on the bus thinks i'm so cheerful, and i am mostly, my secret they don't realize is that i'm able to be, because of not having to live with anyone.
there are tons of things everyone else takes for granted i live cheerfully without. a car, watching television, the use of credit to buy things i can't already pay for.
i've never understood or been attracted to business, or understood the way most people look at art.
why anyone would want portraits of themselves or other humans.
my world is the world of what is there besides people. the world of places and things. and things not as possessions but as parts of that world.
and as things to make things with or things to make things out of.
with never enough space of my own to put or have or make most of them.
which is why, for me, almost everything is on the computer,
because it only takes up the space the computer occupies.
Cracked up there.
>> I also like to shart my navel-gazing prattle into textfields so that maybe five or six other people will read it and reply with their own comments which is more satisfying than doing other things I should be doing like taking a shower and doing the laundry and generally being an adult.
My life right now.
I spend most of my time in front of a screen hunched over pressing keys frantically or staring listlessly, most of my adult life has consisted of either doing this, or lying on a bed dozing off my brief existence away.
I would best say FA is my main "Hobby" as I spend hours reviewing the images featuring the art, costuming, crafting and writing others submit, and I try to give positive comments to encourage these creative people to continue on with their works. I dearly miss being able to contribute my own art, and getting the feedback from the other FA members which helps me improve my creations though. I really. really enjoy getting a two way exchange of conversation and ideas going as the process often leads to more creative actions. I guess I could say that I like using FA to boost my creativity much the same way going to Furry conventions used to do for me, back when I could afford to go "Conning".
My second "Hobby" of sorts is playing the CA Lottery, in the hopes that I could one day use the winnings to improve my way of living, and also get my "Art Machine" back up and working again. This includes not only investing in hardware and programs, but also taking classes to learn how to better use the programs and systems. I've had noting but frustration recently because a very generous friend gave me a 27" , (24"?) Wacom Cintiq tablet, and all I have mastered is hooking the thing up, and turning it on. It reminds me of the time when I was in College, and like a true Science Geek I bought a Texas Instruments Ti 55, which had like 80 functions, (Pretty High Tech for 1977.) and I only used Add Subtract, Multiply, Divide, percent, and occasionally the square root keys.
I also enjoy hiking along the hills and around the city of Pasadena. I discovered going on long, "Meditative" walks through the redwoods above Oakland when I lived there not only helped me keep healthy and trim, but it also helped me work out my writing and story ideas by being able to speak the lines aloud, and feel the way the words Worked as I spoke them.
Other than that, I still enjoy drawing, although my current images are more concerned with figure work as opposed to the complex machinery I like to draw.
Finally, one bit of advice that I like to use is: "Don't ever lose that "Young" person inside of you. You can age, but don't grow old."
Here's one from today. http://www.furaffinity.net/full/22182994/
A scan never does justice to these..
Save that, I use electrical conductors to manipulate light diodes, in order to visually represent homo-sapiens with animalistic attributes, sporting bare mammaries and posteriors, at my leisure.
BTW, tastes can change. Go incrementally, give each step time to acclimate.
Otherwise, I stare at more colorful screens and ask people to make more of those just so I can feel good about something someone else did for me.
Explaining said amazing, terrible, science fiction universe is almost as shameful to describe as admitting I buy, build, and paint my own cripplingly expensive toys. I actually don't have the energy to even try to summarize it adequately. Every time I try, it spirals out of control as I desperately try to make the last insane thing I said make more sense, but that only makes it worse. A 10 thousand year old corpse sits atop a golden throne worshiped as a God by the very galactic empire of humans he tried to free from religion. To keep this corpse-god alive he is fed the souls of thousands of space wizards every day, all to stave off the eventual and impending moment when daemonic entities formed by the whims of real, malevolent, Gods will try to tear reality as sunder and bring their nightmarish hell-scape of reality to life. And those are the motivations of just two of the dozen odd factions involved. As you can see, that impressive run on sentence only opens up more questions, and I feel bad for even trying to explain it.
I also sit on a hard floor and repeatedly press buttons in varying combinations to make a 3D model (made to look like a human) do lots of cool and fun stuff while I sit and envy this fake person for all the stuff I can make them do, but not do myself... QwQ
long version make shit from metal and stuff which is shifting from hobby to career .
wait the tldr version was longer ill just go cry in a corner .
also as someone who by some impossible miraculous amazing event that has utterly nothing to do with modern medicine has managed to maintain enough cell cohesiveness and overall body integrity to make 51 years with zero defects other than childhood onset arthritis, im utterly amazed . go fig huh ?
Adhering heat-treated pulverized pigment powder onto dead tree flesh in the hopes of making it somehow live again.
I also make children's beads into pornography.
The barren monochrome mocks me with its incessant nothing--
a visual silence that I cannot bear, yet feel impotent to alter.
Despite the futility of it, I growl commands at phantom fragments
floating, lethargic and unrealized, in my private periphery.
They shiver and swoon; some fade from sight, others begrudgingly obey
until they coalesce into a whisper of what they might become.
Word spreads, and their numbers swell. The whisper becomes a murmur,
becomes a rumble, becomes a roar, and sparks fly as their fusion
creates a brief but brilliant portrait of something that did not exist
until that moment. It would fade into nothing in equal haste
with only half-remembered shadows to mark its passing.
I strain to transcribe the spectacle before it is lost like the countless before,
cursing the inadequacy of my words and hoping against hope to do it justice.
Then it is gone, without warning or apology, and I am left as I began:
alone with my thoughts, staring once again into the void, watching and waiting--
the impatient medium through which, letter by letter and inch by painstaking inch,
an entirely new world pieces itself into being.
And sometimes I play video games.
I also spend nearly-countless hours sitting in a moderately-uncomfortable chair, staring at a glowing monitor while trying to make pixels form patterns that could be considered optimum responses to other patterns, while fighting the laws of probability by utilizing tactical and strategic prowess within the limits of the current pixel-based scenario. There are many such scenarios.
I also spend time in a box-shaped room with three other people, all wielding butterfly nets at high tension, striking a rubber sphere to propel it around the room is such patterns that 2 of the 3 others (my immediate opponents, the last being a nominal ally) fail to reach the sphere with their own nets before it has struck the floor of the box twice after my strike. ...All this while notionally avoiding actually striking anyone with the sphere or the nets. I occupy myself in this particular way for a couple of hours, thrice a week. ...Somehow, I've survived. Not everyone I've shared this pastime with has done so.
I handle live explosives, stick them into hollow metal tubes before making them explode poking holes in bits of paper
I play minecraft because I have nothing (or no ONE) better to do with my time.
Plus the first one is just cool.
in this den of leftism you can pm me if you feel safer sharing that way
I then take said devices and lug them into the hot, humid and mosquito laden environment of the lovely State I reside in the hopes of finding something that is actually worth looking at more than once. ( Which is rare )
When I DO find that something, it is always something the gear isn't quite configured for so I spend the next frantic few moments trying to get it there before the moment is lost.
Sometimes I'm successful, most of the time I am not.
In the end, I'm always hot, dehydrated and missing a few pints of blood :|
Sometimes I use that device to hit movable plastic cubes on a flat rectangular thing to either interact with a simulation of a fictional world or to assemble a line upon line of symbols, which I also like to look at and decipher, both on the device as well as on the aforementioned photoautotroph skeleton sheets bound into a brick-shaped stack.
I also like to intrude into the lifes of a hyper-diverse strain of land-dwelling crabs and the closest living relatives of trilobites like a creepy voyeur, sometimes using a device that's similar to an eye to conserve the light they reflected at a moment.